Jacob Marleys Daughter
by The J.A.M. a.k.a. Numbuh i
Summary: Also some Romance and Suspense in this. The Dakota problem of the previous stories is taken care of, in a very unique way. Christmas story! Nominated for 11 UKE Awards! Reuploaded with corrections and additions.
1. Authors Note

Additional information for this fanfic is available in my profile. I can't post it here because FFN will remove the links. 


	2. Trailer!

**TONIGHT**

**ON THE ABC WEEKEND SPECIAL SATURDAY MORNING MOVIE:**

"Posterity doesn't necessarily require genetic compatibility in order to be so." — The J.A.M.

**_STEVEN SPIELBERG PRESENTS / PRESENTA / APRESENTA / PRÉSENTENT..._**

THE RE-TELLING OF A CLASSIC IN A WAY YOU NEVER EXPECTED...

_ "Dee, it's over."  
_

___ Over…over…over…over…over…over…  
_

**OHHHHHH FORTUNAAAAA......!!!**

___ It wasn't the dust that had her completely riled, and it wasn't the rubble, or the hole on the wall, or even the emptiness of one of her most secure vaults._

**VEEEEELUT LUNAAAA...!**

_______ She glanced out one window, noticing how the snow magnified the moonlight and-_

**STAAAAA--TU--VA--RI--A--BILIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS--!!!**

_________ "What do you want, Uncle? If it's money, there's none. I'm deep in debt right now."_

**...Semper crescis...**

___________ "The debt is finally paid in full!! You're finally out of the red!"_

**...Aut decrescis...**

_____________ "But why would he? Was he approaching bankruptcy and needed hard cash immediately?_

**...Vita deteeeestaaaaabiliiiis...**

_______________ "--and please--just take away all the love I still have for her--all of this is just--just--consuming me--"_

**...Nunc obdurat...**

_________________ "Far from it! NOW is the perfect time to take advantage of all those idiots on a shopping frenzy!! NOW is the time to hike up prices, lower production, and cut warranty time...!"_

**...Et tunc curat...**

_________________ Remorse.  
__________________ Conviction.  
__________________ Pain.__  
__________________ Pity.  
__________________ Repentance?_

**________**

**_______________...Ludo mentis aaacieeeem..._**

___________________ ...she asked, as femininely as she could muster for her young age, complete with eye flutter._

**...Egestatem...**

___________________ A homeless grey dog was trying to warm himself next to a steel drum that had a very low fire inside._

**...Potestatem...**

___________________ "I'm not going to stand for this anymore, Tex. With or without you, I'm going to make changes around here! And I'm talking RADICAL CHANGES!!!"_

**...Dissolvit ut glaciiiiiieeeeem...**

___________________ "Is it just me, or is the snow below them melting?"_  


**...Sors immanis...**

___________________ ...pull out a rose out of nowhere, and lay it down in front of a very small headstone..._

**...Et inanis...**

___________________ The lagomorph appeared to be speaking to an empty chair..._

**...Rota tu voluuubiliiiiis...**

___________________ Several days later, the family climbed on their dark green pick up truck, and drove to the city._

**...Status malus...**

___________________ "...you're not a villain anymore; you've become a criminal..."_

**...Vana salus...**

___________________ "Why don't they let evolution take its course and eliminate that freak before it's born, geez!!"_

**...Semper dissoluuuubiliiiiis...**

___________________ ...repeatedly dipping one of her hairs in a liquid to watch it dissolve..._

**...Obumbrata...**

___________________ She spat, "Go to Hell."_

**...Et velata...**

___________________ ...white silk curtains filtered the moonlight coming in from the balcony doors to the right of the bed..._

**...Michi quoque niiiiiteriiiiiiis...**

___________________ "You do the works of your father."  
____________________...and you will do the lusts of your father. He was a murderer right from the start…"  
_

**...Nunc per ludum...**

___________________ On and on they guessed, until a buzz from the stopwatch stopped them..._

**...Dorsum nudum...**

___________________ ...apparently showing off chest muscles she didn't know he had..._

**...Fero tu--i sceleeeeriiiiiis...**

___________________ "My father hates charities, so I hate charities even MORE!!! Isn't it enough that he has to cheat on taxes and employees' salaries and welfare that you have to make me (gritting teeth) GIVE in order to compensate...???"_  


**SORS SALUTIS!!!**

___________________ The J weakly raised his right fist in victory._

**ET VIRTUTIS!!!**

___________________ "...I want to make tons of money just as much as you do, but I will NOT do it if it means breaking the law and committing fraud!"_

**MICHI NUNC CONTRAAAARIAAAAAA!!!**

___________________ She couldn't scream.  
____________________ She couldn't cry.  
____________________ She couldn't speak.  
____________________ She couldn't think._  


**EST AFFECTUS!!!**

___________________ He waved his revolver toward a building...It only took her a moment to deduce that he was telling her where to go. She turned--_

**ET DEFECTUS!!!**

___________________ The darkness was oppressing her, filling her with fear she had never felt before._

**SEMPER IN ANGAAAAAAARIAAAAAAAA!!!**

___________________...shackled all over the phantasm's back, arms, and legs, and shackled to the chains were huge bags of gold ingots, coins, and bills..._

**HAC IN HORA!!!**

___________________ The clock struck TWO._

**SINE MORA!!!**

___________________ "We're wasting nightlight. Come on!!"_

**CORDUM PULSUM TAAAAANGITEEEEEEE!!!**

___________________ He turned to the band as A.J. padded to the keyboard, and began playing..."Oi don't suppose you'd want to sing, would you? Maybe vent a little?"_

**QUAD PER SORTEM!!!**

___________________ "I was expecting some complications due to your species difference, but I didn't expect them so soon."_

**STERNIT FORTEM!!!**

___________________ WHAM!!!  
____________________ The ghost looked at the floor, which now had a flattened teenager under an ethereal mallet he had pulled out of nowhere. _  


**MECUM OOOOOOOOOOOOOMNES PLAAAANGITEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE...!!!**

___________________ Tex toppled and fell on the rubble... / ...his broken heart continued to pour tears... / The cry of someone lost, perchance, forever / ...she could see them all around, crying, wailing... / All her brothers and sisters, and parents, cried in mute agony. / ...his eyes were red once again, and he was weeping openly... /...his heart starting to fill with pain... / ...suddenly opened her eyes wide and put a paw on her abdomen. "Whoa!!" / Suddenly, he dragged his foot-paw along the carpet... / She ran for her life... /...a burst of smoke exploded through the floor... / SHOOF... / They fell off the balcony... / The sleigh was airborne! / He broke down in sobs now, and fell on the floor... / ...a double flying kick to the jaw... / ...she fell on her face... / ...And pull out a pistol. / BANGCRASH!!! / ...the ghost stumbled and fell with infernal clanking / he placed his last rose on the lonely grave..._

**...EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE......!!!**

**CREE SUMMER FRANKS**

___________________ "I AM MY FATHER'S DAUGHTER!!!!" _

**IS**

**...EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE......!!!**

**SCROOGE & MARLEY**_________________**  
**_

_________________**  
**_

**  
**

**...EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE......!!!**

**JACOB MARLEY  
**

**  
**

**  
**

**...EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!  
**

******JACOB MARLEY'S DAUGHTER**

**___________________  
______________________ "This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this isn't happening…"_**

**______________________****NEXT / NÄCHSTE / NÄSTA / A CONTINUACION / A SEGUIR**


	3. Prologue

(…unWARP!)

Good evening.

PROLOGUE

(It's recommended that you read "Mary", "The Fourteen", and "Mary's Quest: Only A Scar", available on this server, in order to understand this story.)

Everything that is done by one, eventually comes back to oneself, whether for good, or for evil, whether for reward, or for judgement, and it is all accounted for in Eternity. One toon will learn this first hand, and she will also learn that there is more than one way to leave behind an inheritance, a legacy, a posterity, a successor, and why not, offspring, whether for good, or for evil. And all that is left behind will continue to bring dividends, whether for good, or for evil, until the end of time.

This is the story of one such toon, and it begins with a vault.

This vault was…

* * *

…Empty. 

Completely empty.

Save for a heap of rubble, and a layer of dust on the floor, obviously caused by a wall that had been blown apart.

It wasn't the dust that had her completely riled, and it wasn't the rubble, or the hole on the wall, or even the emptiness of one of her most secure vaults.

What had Dakota Dee completely riled was the fact that everything was exactly the same as she had left it. It was as if she had never travelled back through time and space to alter the destiny of her father's nemesis, who happened to be the father of _her_ nemesis. Furthermore, Acme Looniversity was still standing, with no traces of riots, bigotry, religious intolerance, racism, or speciesism, save for her own, of course. She was so riled she didn't even bother to change the clothes she used in her time trip.

_The J was still alive._

And not only that, that black panther was more of a Waiting One now than before.

The M, J's older sister, was alive as well, but that was beside the point.

_And The J.A.M.—J and M's father—still had his left eye in his face._

What was also getting her riled was the fact that she had failed miserably, AGAIN.

But what was sending her wrath to the stratosphere was the fact that there would be no more time trips for her, or anyone, anymore.

The time machine was gone.

The hole in the wall was too small for such a huge machine to be pulled through, so it was somehow stolen through teleportation, i.e., warping.

And the only toons she knew who had the ability to warp, or at least simulate a warp, were the fourteen older sons and daughters of Buster and Babs Bunny (the Bunny warren actually had seven more kits, but they were still in kindergarten or diapers), The J, The M, and The J.A.M.

Professor Coyote and Calamity Coyote had mechanical transporters; so somehow, all of these toons got together and stole the time machine right out of her vault.

And now, all her plans to remove The J, The J.A.M., and Acme Looniversity from the plane of existence had themselves been removed from the plane of existence.

"Dee?"

Behind her stood her insanely faithful sidekick, Tex, a young green buck with a black shirt, one of Buster and Babs' kits.

"Dee, you're fighting a Higher Power."

She considered that perhaps her nemeses' victories were nothing short of miraculous. Since she didn't believe in miracles, even though she lived in toonity, the only explanation to her defeat was that _someone_ must have helped her nemeses without her knowing it.

"Dee, you might as well be trying to stop an earthquake. You've already wasted too many resources into something you simply can't change!"

The humanmaid turned and saw that her sidekick's almond brown eyes were reddened and appeared to be pleading, and his ears were pointing straight down. Perhaps he was allergic to all this dust. She turned again and continued walking aimlessly through the empty vault.

"Dee, it's over."

Over…over…over…over…over…over…

At this point, something within Dakota Dee, daughter of Montana Maximilian and Elmyra Duff-Maximilian, not only snapped, but actually rebounded itself out of the plane of existence.

The Caucasian ran up to him, grabbed the buck's shirt with such force that her fingers tore through the fabric, and hissed into his face, "No, Tex, it's NOT over. Not until J or J.A.M. are gone. I WILL win. I'm RICH. I HAVE to win. No (CENSORED) felines are going to get the best of me, EVER! I WILL DESTROY THE J, IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO!"

With that, she threw him out of her way, and stormed out of the vault.

Tex toppled and fell on the rubble, and for a long time, he simply laid there.

And his broken heart continued to pour tears for the female he loved.

* * *

"Posterity doesn't necessarily require genetic compatibility in order to be so." — The J.A.M. 

Cree Summer Franks is

JACOB MARLEY'S DAUGHTER

also starring:

John Kassir

Cree Summer Franks as Mary Melody

The N.I.M.H.

Francesca Marie Smith

Dick Van Dyke

and Chuck McCann

Special appearance by Bill Cosby.

Written by The J.A.M. (but please call me J.A.M.)

Some segments were co-written with Jennifer Cleckley a.k.a. Rottin Kid/The Incredible Werekitty.

Edited by professor Nathaniel T. Freeman

_To Ebenezer Scrooge, Nicholas of Bari, Shaul of Tarshish, Zaccheus of Jericho, James Cash Penny, Milton Hershey, Adam Smith, Abraham of Ur, and all their sons and daughters._


	4. Stave 1: Red Numbers Red Letters

STAVE ONE - RED NUMBERS, RED LETTERS

Tex was right, of course. It was impossible for Montana Max _not_ to see that enormous amounts of energy, which his factories needed, had been suddenly depleted in the previous days. A quick investigation led him to his daughter, and as punishment, her allowance was suspended and her savings were depleted until the electric bill had been paid off. Naturally, this forced Dakota to work longer hours after school and weekends. Even Christmas Break didn't provide any relief for her, because now that she had no school she had to work all day long in order to bring her balance out from the red.

All that made her more resentful than before. Normally she would be working day and night for her own pleasure and gain, not to pay off debts, much less to pay her father. She resented her father, her nemesis, and the green buck who, for some reason, didn't mind working with her throughout all this.

On one particular winter afternoon, it was precisely that green buck who burst into her office within her father's mansion. The office consisted of a large room tiled with mahogany, with a matching desk and bookcases, save for the red brick fireplace on the wall, currently burning, and a large window behind the desk. Most of the furnishings were gifts from her father, but the silk curtains and the red carpeting were her own idea. The humanmaid, in her charcoal business blouse and skirt, with black dress shoes, didn't seem to be affected by the relaxing effect of the lavish set up, for she was busy typing furiously in front of her ultra-thin monitor.

"Dee! I've got great news!" burst the green buck, bounding to her desk, and unable to stay still. "The debt is finally paid in full! You're finally out of the red!"

The Caucasian stopped typing for a moment, brushed back some of her almond-brown hair, glared at her jovial sidekick, and returned her attention to her on-line business.

"Dee? I got the quarterly report here! It's all paid for!" He pulled out a pawful of papers from his body pocket, but his boss didn't seem to notice. "Dee?" He tilted his ears toward her, placing the report beside the keyboard. Still she typed furiously. Taking a chance, he gently placed his gloved paw over her left hand, "Dee, it's over, it's okay, it's paid for. You can relax now."

She stiffened at his touch, but not because of any romantic causes. "Relax?" she asked dangerously, slowly turning to him.

Quickly, Tex removed his paw, and lowered his head and ears as fright took over him. "Y-yes, Dee. Your hard work paid off. You're finally making profits again. And since we won't go back to school until January, well, maybe you should take a break and—um—I don't know—uh—go skiing?"

Her father's favourite winter sport, practiced in Switzerland, or New Zealand if it was June. "Tex, have you any idea how much catching up we have to do now?"

"Catching up?" he winced in confusion, raising his ears.

"Oh yes. We spent the last two months paying off a debt—which SHOULD have been an investment—that I SHOULDN'T have had to pay in the first place. We've lost two months of profits because SOMEONE foiled my plans." She turned back to the monitor. "Luckily for me, we're in the Christmas season."

"So you're going on vacation?"

"Far from it! NOW is the perfect time to take advantage of all those idiots on a shopping frenzy! NOW is the time to hike up prices, lower production, and cut warranty time! If I time things just right, in two weeks I can make up for the lost profits of two months." She continued altering numbers and typing out orders, but suddenly, she stopped, sat back on her tall leather chair, and sighed with resignation. "But even if the debts had come from elsewhere, they would have been paid off sooner if The J were here to help me. And the profits of the holiday season would have gone to the moon if he'd only listened to me and stayed here!"

The lapine turned slightly away. There was that name again: The J. Though Tex considered him a good friend, he knew that Dakota's heart would never let him go, even if it was for material reasons now. And despite the fact that The J had a girlfriend, Tex's younger sister, Anni, Dakota would continue pining after the black panther, which meant he would continue pining after her, unless something drastic happened.

"Dee, you know J would have never cheated his customers, like you're doing now. But he _still_ would have found a way to make a profit without cheating! It _can_ be done, you know!"

"J is an IDIOT!" The brunette glared at him and huffed for a moment, then turned back to her work. "And so is the rest of his family. This holiday is the only good thing that his religion has come up with—except maybe Easter. I just love it when chocolate, sugar, and egg stocks go up, don't you?" The male remained silent at that comment, his heart starting to fill with pain once more. "Oh, and before I forget," she shoved him a written order, "take that to the printers. Make sure that 'Christmas' is spelled 'X-mas'. Can't be too careful when it comes to political correctness." A smile appeared on her face for the first time in two months. "It's amazing how one little letter can save us millions of dollars. I love political correctness, don't you?"

She continued typing, so she didn't notice the lagomorph pull out of his shirt a gold chain, which held a Cross and a Star of David. With his ears behind him, he murmured, "Sure, it's done wonders for this planet."

The object of his affections obviously ignored that comment, and continued ranting, "But still, J was a fool to let religion get the best of him! He simply doesn't know the wealth he's missing!"

Tex looked at her. He had to make her see the Light. "You don't know that. He _could_ be sending it ahead."

Dakota raised an eyebrow at him. "Ahead? My dear Tex, you know toons can't die—heh, of old age, at least. So we CAN take it with us, because we don't go anywhere!" Suddenly a scowl replaced her smile. "J was a (CENSORED)! We could have made beautiful music—and profits—togeth—"

Her romantic ponderings were interrupted by an unexpected visitor who burst through the large double doors. "DEE!"

The teenager winced as an adult human with white skin, light brown hair, blue eyes, white jacket, blue jeans, and black and white sneakers, invaded her sanctum. Words had to crawl through her teeth. "Hello, Uncle Duncan."

Elmyra's younger brother ignored the grinding teeth and walked happily around her desk, standing next to the rabbit, leaning down and planting a kiss on the female's head. "How's my favourite niece?"

How she hated him. "What do you want, Uncle? If it's money, there's none. I'm deep in debt right now." Tex would have said something, but he knew that Mister Duff didn't care either way.

"Is that all you think about, Dee? Please. I just invited your mother to our annual Christmas party and she told me I could find you up here so I could invite you as well! And as long as we're all here, I guess I'll invite your boyfriend as well!" he gestured at Tex.

"HE IS **_NOT_** MY BOYFRIEND!" she screamed, gales of wind blowing through hair and fur.

But he still continued smiling. "He's not? My oh my, Dee, it looks like you're missing out on plenty. I mean, look at him! He looks like the pick of the warren, doesn't he?" Tex's cheek fur turned purple as he blushed. "Or are you waiting for a human boyfriend?"

Or half-human, at least, thought Tex. Perhaps one reason why Dakota sought J was that he was half-human and half-jaguar, genetically, at least, though The M showed more of a mix than her brother did, as she was an African-American human, but with jaguar-patterned hair and orange eyes. Perhaps Dakota, too, was seeking to have genetically enhanced offspring one day, and J was a perfect candidate for that. However, everyone _knew_ that the outcome was unpredictable. After all, Nolan Carrotte, a friend of his, had an albino rat for a father and a black cat for a mother, and he came out very mixed, with a Siamese-type fur pattern and rodent incisors between carnivore fangs. Nolan's younger sister, Talleen, instead, came out as a perfectly normal black cat with green eyes. A.J. Fox, Nolan's cousin, had a red fox for a father and a brown rabbit for a mother, and he came out nearly 100 per cent copper-brown rabbit, save for a white belly and muzzle, brown points in his paws, foot-paws and ears, blue eyes, a slightly longer tail, slightly shorter ears, and fangs as well, though not as long as his father's.

The adult continued, "Oh, never mind that, you have plenty of time. But still, he can come too, even if he's not your boyfriend. We're going to have TONS of fun!"

The female teenager slowly put her hands on either side of the keyboard. "Uncle, you invite me to your Christmas party every year."

"That's because I've held one every year since I moved out of your grandparents' house."

"And what have I told you every year you've asked me?"

"Well, let's see," he pondered. "You get all nasty, you yell at me, and you decline my invitation."

She glared cryogenically at him. "And what makes you think that this year will be different?"

He glared back at her, but with determination and conviction, "Love, hope, faith, prayer, and perhaps the far-fetched idea that your boyfriend here will soften you into acce—"

"**_TEX——IS——NOT——MY——BOYFRIEND!"_**

Moments after the burst, Duncan swept his light-brown hair back into position, and straightened himself up. Then he set Tex back on his foot-paws, as he had fallen over. "It's your loss, then, Dee, even though you KNOW that no one there will ask you for money. And if someone does, they'll have to deal with me. Oh, and someone else is here to see you."

She sat back, "Who?"

On cue, Granny, attired in her ever-popular nineteenth-century dark blue dress, entered Dakota's office. The younger female mumbled, "Who lets these people inside the mansion?" Then, she asked the elder directly, "Professor Granny! Did you forget to give us ten tons of homework to do over the holidays?"

The elder waved that off as she shuffled to the desk, "Oh, heavens, no, Dee. I already gave you your homework. I came to speak to you about more important matters."

Eyebrow. "More important?"

"Yes. A lot of toons in the Looniversity have been getting concerned about Leo and Miranda's baby."

Those names appeared to draw a blank on the young female's memory. "Who?"

"Leo and Miranda Carrotte," explained Tex. "Nolan and A.J.'s aunt and uncle. Miranda is some three months pregnant right now."

"Oh, them," she said uninterestedly. "What about the baby?"

Granny continued, "Well, the doctor ran some tests on Miranda and the baby, and the results have got him worried. There might be problems later on with hybridisation, so she's been hospitalised." Here she stopped, expecting Dakota to show some interest, but the young entrepreneur simply looked at the elder as if wanting to know how all of that concerned her. So, the elder resumed, "I don't know if you've heard of this, but both of their families put together a fund, first, to prepare for the baby shower next year, and second, to help medical research for toons in her condition, and newborn toons in the baby's condition."

Dakota closed her eyes and shook her head slightly, as if trying to digest all this information and see where exactly she, her fortune, and any potential profit, managed to fit in. This was fruitless, of course. "So what exactly do you need me for?"

Granny pulled out a clipboard, "Well, I first talked to your father and asked him to give a research grant to Acme General, but unfortunately, you know how he feels about charities. So, I came here to talk to you. How much do you wish to give to Acme General?"

For some reason, the word "give" appeared to trigger something within Dakota, something primeval, almost genetically programmed. Slowly, she stood and walked around the desk. "Let me get this straight: you want _me_ to give _you_ money, for free."

"If it's not too much trouble."

"And you already asked my dad, and you saw his reactions."

"You _can_ remain anonymous, if you feel it might help—"

Standing in front of her, Dakota asked, "Professor, if you saw my father's reactions, what makes you think I'll react differently?"

Granny's blue eyes looked tenderly down at the youngster. "Well, for starters, you're young, eager, and very good at business, almost as good as The J." Dakota's right eye twitched. "Also, you've seen all that your father has done before, and how his lack of interest has made things difficult for local charities. What's more, it's Christmas, Dee. It's the perfect time to giv—"

"I AM MY FATHER'S DAUGHTER!" screamed the teenager, silencing the office. "My father hates charities, so I hate charities even MORE! Isn't it enough that he has to cheat on taxes and employees' salaries and welfare that you have to make me (gritting teeth) _GIVE_ in order to compensate? And do you actually _think_ that because it's Christmas that I'm going to think differently?"

Duncan interrupted, "Now, now, Dee, watch that attitude! Santa Claus might hear—"

"LET HIM HEAR!" she burst back. "As if I _need_ that old fatso! I have all the wealth I want, and I will MAKE more!"

Her uncle sighed, "So, let me guess: you think Christmas is a 'humbug', Scrooge?"

"Scrooge" chuckled, "'Humbug'?" Then, she scowled, "Christmas is a **_(CENSORED)!"_** That word was enough to make Granny pale, clothes and all, and with a scream, she dashed out of the office, leaving her panicked silhouette carved neatly on the double doors. Dakota looked at that and commented, "Well, that was easy."

Her uncle had paled a trifle, but not enough to make him follow Granny just yet. Instead, he walked up to her and said, "We will save a spot for you at the table, just as we do every year. I hope to see you there, Dee. Good night." With that, Elmyra's brother calmly left his niece's office.

"The _nerve_ of some people! As if I'd actually want to help furry toons! And a _freak_ furry toon at that! Why don't they let evolution take its course and eliminate that freak before it's born, geez! I'll help DNA improvement MY way!" The whole ordeal had reminded her of her truncated plans of further combining jaguar and human DNA, for _her_ benefit, of course. But, she reasoned, she was still young. Still, with a disgusted sigh, Dakota turned and was about to return to her desk, when she saw Tex standing nearby, facing away from her, the printer order on the floor, ears completely down, and grinding his teeth VERY loudly. "And what are _you_ waiting for? Go home already!" The male didn't move, but instead kept up the loud grinding. The female didn't need annoying noise in her office, so she whirled him around and ordered, "Hey, didn't you hear me! I said GET OUT—!" When she turned him around, she saw that his eyes were red once again, and he was weeping openly. Shocked at this display of emotion, especially from a male, she stood back and asked, "What the hell is wrong with you now?"

Tex could only look at the red carpet now. He simply couldn't bring himself to look at the female he loved directly in the eye, not after what she had said about Christmas. "Dee," he sobbed, voice cracking, "tell me something: did you _really_ love J?"

She wondered why he was asking this, but she quickly replied, "Hey, who didn't? He's handsome, has an awesome body, he's great in business—" Her brief romantic thoughts were suddenly replaced, "But that (CENSORED) betrayed me!"

"So, you hate him now?"

"**_YES! _**I hate him with every atom of my being! We could have done so much together, and he threw it all away!"

The buck continued, still looking at the floor, "Dee, you did _not_ have any love for J."

She was surprised to hear someone challenge her feelings, but even more that it had been this cream puff of a rabbit. "What-did-you-say?" she asked dangerously.

"You heard me. You really didn't love J at all. If what you had for him had been _true love_, you would have wanted him to be happy with whatever choice he made. And you would have been happy for him now despite the fact that he's dating Anni. Instead, you tried to destroy him _twice_. You never really loved him, Dee. You just wanted him as an asset, not as a person. If he had been a computer business programme, you would probably be happier."

The humanmaid grabbed his shirt and pulled him to her face, "You (CENSORED)! You have NO IDEA what it's like to be betrayed!"

He still wouldn't look at her in the eye, "I know more than you could possibly fathom, Dee. That is why I must now give you an ultimatum."

"'Ultimatum'?" she asked, as if he had asked her for a gold ingot.

"Dee, you have no idea how much it hurt me when you said what you felt for J now, Passover, Christmas, or our beliefs in general."

Another mental speed bump. "Huh? 'Our' beliefs?"

Tex pulled out his gold Cross and Star of David, showing them to Dakota, and finally, he looked at her in the eye. She saw in his almond-brown eyes a spark she had never seen before. "I've been a Waiting One long before J left you." For a moment, she felt fear when she saw the symbols, remembering that The J had a chain exactly like that. Before she could retort, her employee continued, "You've tried to destroy him, his parents, his sister, and all that they've accomplished, and all that's done is bring hardship to _you_. But there is a way out of all this hate, greed, and evil." He paused, trying to pull himself out of her eyes. "Dee, I'm asking you—begging you, to leave J and Anni alone, and move on, and let me lead you into this life we have. You've already gone beyond the limits of any normal villain we've known: Dee, you're not a villain anymore; you've become a _criminal_. I'm offering you a way out, but you have to _want_ it. I can't hold the lifeline for you forever, because I too, must choose between my own convictions of what is right and just—or joining you in the Dark Side, which I _will NOT_ do." He gently put his paws over her hands, which still gripped his shirt. "Please, Dee, stop this! Stop all the evil and the greed, and come with me! You won't believe how much happier you can be without all the bitterness and hate! In fact, you could help Miranda's baby more than you think! You may not have the time machine anymore, but all the data and research you did to make it work and all you did to prepare yourself for the time trips—and to prepare another human-jaguar mix—could easily branch off into medical breakthroughs, if you put all the data in the correct paws! And _you'd_ get the credit for it, not your dad, not Professor Coyote, or even Calamity!" She just looked at him. "Please, Dee, come with me!"

The brunette hesitated. She felt his paws on her hands, and after a moment, she shook him off, throwing him back. "You pathetic rabbit! Do you think religion can soften me?"

To her surprise, he replied, still crying, "No, Dee. No religion can soften _any_ heart. What we have is much more. And you, as a human, can get _much_ more than me, a rabbit. We know the original and _true_ meaning of Christmas—"

"HA! Do you really think that (CENSORED) Christmas will change me? My father never needed your religion, so I don't either!"

The lapine sighed, and ground his teeth in pain. Suddenly, he dragged his foot-paw along the carpet, pushing down the strands momentarily, forming a line on the floor. "Dee, this is the last chance I can give you: I've drawn this line, and I can't cross it to go to you, because you are in the Dark Side. _You've_ got to cross it to come with me, and you will have something much better than what you have now." The Caucasian looked at him, shocked at the challenge he gave her. "Please, Dee, come with me!"

She spat, "Go to Hell."

That was like an ICBM going through his chest, as his teeth ground louder than before. His eyes were practically waterfalls now. "Then I will do you one last favour, Dee, and then I will have to leave, and never come back here, or do business with you." He pulled out a Book, and handed it to her. "Read this, and it will explain everything we believe in, why we believe, why we behave differently from others, what Christmas and Passover are _truly_ about, why J had to reject you—and—and—why now _I'm_ forced to choose, like J had to choose before."

"Huh? What do you mean _you're_ forced to choose?"

His response was to suddenly grab her shoulders and pull her in for a deep kiss, as he had always wanted to do since he first saw her. She, of course, was stunned and frozen, unable to return his embrace. An eternity later, the buck released the stunned humanmaid, and shuffled toward the door. Before he left, he turned and said, "You don't have to read it all at once. The important parts are in red."

And with that, Tex Bunny walked out of Dakota Dee's office forever.

She didn't know what to make of all this. Did he just quit? Did he just cut himself off from her and her businesses, without even asking for severance pay? Did he love her as much as she wanted The J? Confused, she held up the Book in her hand. It was somewhat thick, but according to Tex, she did not need to read from beginning to end in one sitting, as the important parts were already marked with red ink.

"Dim!"

The office's lights darkened at her command, and she sat on a black leather recliner near the fireplace, where she opened the Book and searched for the red segments. At this moment, a light rain began to fall outside the large window, momentarily drawing her attention there.

The Fourteen & Co. (originally by D.C. Talk)

"Red Letters"

SUPERNATURAL

© 1998 Achtober Songs / Out of Twisted Roots Music / Blind Theif Publishing / Fun Attic Music

(andante)

She also thought she heard sleigh bells, but dismissed that as a figment of her imagination.

Turning to the Book again, she read: **_"Happy are the merciful, for they will obtain mercy…"_**

Ethereally, a piano began to play.

An odd event took place now: for some reason, as she read, fourteen young rabbits faded into her office. Junior, Alexi, Miriam, Tex, Friz, Shotsy, Morty, Bekki, June, Hunni, Anni, Mel, Buck, and Chuck, were standing there, in their everyday attire, apparently spread about randomly. All had very serious expressions on their faces, yet none looked at any other, or even at Dakota. Then, other toons faded in as well: The J, in his white t-shirt; his older sister, The M, in a green sleeveless blouse and blue slacks, her jaguar hair flowing in a breeze that no one could feel; Nolan Carrotte, in his red shirt, yellow vest, and blue shorts; his little sister Talleen, in her pink shirt and shorts; A.J. Fox, wearing a white Credence Clearwater Revival shirt and blue jeans; and finally, a twenty-two-year-old female rat with light-brown fur, pink headband and tail bow, long brown headfur, white t-shirt, and rolled up blue jeans: Roberta Rat.

Dakota read on as the other toons faded in and out, as they sang:

Junior held open his own copy of the Book, _"Pages—filled with a holy Message—"_

Alexi blew a kiss upward, _"—Sealed with a kiss from Heaven—"_

Miriam opened an aged scroll, _"—On a scroll long ago."_

Tex, arms crossed, _"Phrases, words that were bound together—"_

Friz, ears sideways, broke a twig,_ "—Now have the power to sever—"_

Shotsy held up a Roman sword, _"—Like a sword evermore."_

Morty looked up, _"Heed the Words divinely spoken!"_

As did Bekki, raising her fists, _"May your restless heart be broken!"_

June held a fist to her chest, _"Let the Supernatural take hooold—"_

Junior, _"There is love—"_

Behind him, Team Aleph,_ "—In the red letters."_

Morty, _"There is truth—"_

Behind him, Team Beth, _"—In the red letters."_

Anni, _"There is hope for the hopeless!"_

Behind her, Team Gimmel,_ "Peace and forgiveness!"_

The Fourteen, _"There is life—"_ that word echoed through the room. _"—in the red letters…in the red letters…"_

Tex trailed off, _"Ohhhh…"_

Dakota read: **_"I have come that they might have life, and might have it abundantly._****_"_**

Hunni continued, holding and looking at her Cross and Star, _"One Man—came to reveal a mystery."_

Anni, looking at a B.C.-A.D. timeline, _"Changing the course of history—"_

Mel, also looking at it, _"—Made the claim He was God."_

Buck, _"Ageless, born of a virgin Mary,"_

Chuck reared and proclaimed, _"Spoke with a Voice that carried through the years—!"_

Team Gimmel, _"It's persevered!"_

The J and The M directly to Dakota now, _"Heed the words divinely spoken!"_

A.J. and Roberta as well, _"May your restless heart be broken!"_

Also Nolan and Talleen, _"Let the Supernatural take hooold—"_

Everytoon, _"Take hold…"_

The humanmaid now saw all the toons around her.

Team Aleph, _"There is love—"_

Tex whispered, looking up, _"I come before You."_

Team Aleph, _"—In the red letters."_

Tex, _"I come unto You."_

Team Beth, _"There is truth—"_

Tex asked her, _"Do you see it?"_

Team Beth, _"—In the red letters."_

Tex, _"I believe it."_

Team Gimmel, _"There is hope for the hopeless!"_

Tex exclaimed, _"Hoooope—for the hopeless!"_

Team Gimmel, _"Peace and forgiveness."_

Tex, _"Peace and forgiveness!"_

The Fourteen, _"There is life—"_echo, _"—in the red letters………in the red letters………"_

Suddenly, the entire room darkened and everyone disappeared, leaving Dakota alone in complete darkness. She jumped up, and could only see herself—and a light in the distance?

(allegro)

The darkness was oppressing her, filling her with fear she had never felt before. She knew that she had to reach the Light in order to escape—but—it was so far away! She ran for her life, and she was approaching it, yes, but now it seemed to be above her.

The J faded in and out, his voice echoing, _"What You say—moves me."_

She had to reach the exit, away from all the echoing voices…

The M, _"Revelation—"_

Tex,_ "Oh, no…!"_

The M, _"—Come and take me."_

Roberta, _"The more I look—!"_

Tex, _"…The more I look…"_

Nolan, _"—The more I see—!"_

Tex, _"…The more I see…"_

A.J., _"The Word of God—!"_

Tex, _"…The Word of God…"_

Everytoon, _"—Is what I neeeeeed—!"_

She was climbing on something—on words?

"**_And you will know the Truth, and the Truth will set you free."_**

The Words seemed to form a ladder toward the light—that was in the shape of a cross?

Talleen shouted, _"Ooh, yeah! Ooh, oh yeah! It's the Book of Love!"_

Roberta added, also shouting, _"Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's the Book of Love—of Looooooooooooooooooooooooooooove—————!"_

When she saw that it was indeed a cross, she stopped.

(andante)

And suddenly, she was sitting on her chair again—everything was normal—and Tex was kneeling in front of her, ears down, holding her hand—

And weeping?

Tex looked at her eyes and sobbed, _"There is love—in the red letters._

_There is truth—in the red letters!"_

The J, beside them, _"Oooooo—!"_

The males, _"There is hope for the hopeless!"_

The females, _"Peace and forgiveness!"_

Tex, still kneeling, _"—and forgiveness, yeah!"_

Everytoon, _"There is life—"_

Tex, _"There is life—!"_

Everytoon, _"—In the red letters—"_

Tex shook his head, _"Ahhh—!"_

Everytoon, _"In the red letters———"_

Tex stood, turned, and whispered, _"I come before You, I come unto You."_

The M, _"Ahhh—"_

Everytoon, _"In the red letters———"_

Tex asked her again, _"Do you see it? I believe in:"_

Everytoon, _"In the red letters———"_

Tex looked up and shouted, _"Speak to me, reveal to me Your Life!"_

Nolan whispered now, _"I come before You, I come unto You."_

Everytoon, _"In the red letters———"_

Tex, _"Speak to me, reveal to me, ohh…"_

The J whispered, _"Do you see it? I believe it."_

The Fourteen, _"Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na na._

_Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na na._

_Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na na._

_Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na na._

_Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na na._

_Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na na."_

The Fourteen & Co. (originally by D.C. Talk)

"Red Letters"

SUPERNATURAL

© 1998 Achtober Songs / Out of Twisted Roots Music / Blind Theif Publishing / Fun Attic Music

All the toons faded away as they na-na-na'ed, leaving the young entrepreneur alone to catch her breath from her apparent run. Had all of this been a dream, or a cheesy music video sequence? She then looked at the Book again, and decided to continue reading. That previous passage had her intrigued; yet it seemed preposterous.

"**_And you will know the Truth, and the Truth will set you free."_**

Set free from what? Lies? Bah, one can only be set free if one is first captive, which she knew she wasn't—

"…_**Whoever does wrongdoing is a slave to wrongdoing, and the slave does not live in the house forever…"**_

For some reason, she almost felt her blood pooling to her feet, as her previous statement of toons living forever seemed to hit a snag according to this—

No.

This book was just a pathetic amalgam of pathetic ideals of right and wrong. Doing wrong never stopped her father, and he had always stayed in this house. She, too, would always stay in her house, after all, neither she nor her father were slaves to wrongdoing, or anything or anyone else, for that matter. It was _she_ who dictated what to do and how to do it, it was _she_ who dictated wrongdoing, and not the other way around. In fact, she was even better at it than her father was, seeing that she was much more intelligent than he was. She followed in her father's footsteps, and had gone beyond what he—

"_**You do the works of your father."**_

Uh, exactly. He taught her well, and she had even surpassed him. True, she had failed to destroy The J, but sooner or later, she would wipe him off the face of—

"**_You are of your father, the Devil, and you will do the lusts of your father. He was a murderer right from the start…"_**

She gasped at that statement. Though she always knew, in the back of her head, that everything she did was tantamount to attempted murder; this Book seemed to throw that fact right in her face, as if It was speaking directly to her—

Enough. She flipped to another section—

_**"Does this offend you?"**_

(CENSORED) right it did! Her father was Montana Max, not a confabulated personification of evil! And this Book had yet to explain why The J or Tex did what they did—

"_**He who follows Me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of Life…"**_

She suddenly remembered the oppressing darkness from which she wanted to escape. Could that be what Tex was referring to? Is that what he was trying to persuade her to do? Leave the Dark Side?

"_**He who hears my Word, and believes in Him that sent Me, will have eternal life, and will not enter into condemnation, but has passed from death to life."**_

Not that it did The J any good, because she had seen him disappear from existence—

—and return, for some reason. But this couldn't be right. How can anyone escape death, especially premeditated termination?

**_"If I want him to remain alive until I return, what's it to you? Follow Me."_**

There it was again.

**_"Follow Me."_**

Follow, follow, follow. Why couldn't _she_ be the one leading? She was a leader, an entrepreneur, others should be following _her_.

"_**Follow Me."**_

That phrase seemed to be all over this Book. And she could do that, follow, and join Tex, his brothers and sisters, following the rules written here, along with The J—

(THUD!)

She flung the Book into the fireplace, where the flames began consuming it.

Like (CENSORED) would she walk beside J, Tex, or a bunch of rabbits, no matter what, or Who, they themselves were following. She needed no one to follow. She would lead, and others would follow her, now, and forever.

She stood and left her office, leaving the Book to burn to ashes.


	5. Stave 2: Ghost of a Father

STAVE TWO - GHOST OF A FATHER

The humanmaid stormed down the halls of her mansion toward her room. It was late and all the lights were off, but there was enough moonlight coming in through the windows to allow her to see her way. She glanced out one window, noticing how the snow magnified the moonlight and—

_**SNOW!**_

She did a double take to make sure she wasn't seeing things. Wasn't it cloudy and raining just now? How could the weather have changed so quickly, and leave such a huge imprint so quickly as well?

Or, maybe she _thought_ it was raining earlier. Yes, that could be it.

Continuing her path toward her room in her ridiculously large mansion, she walked down a hallway that had portraits of people she and her father admired. Most were long gone, but all, at one point or another, were, or had been, incredibly rich: John D. Rockefeller, Bill Gates, Lee Iacocca, Henry Ford, Montana's father, and of course: Montana Max himself. All were people she looked up to, admired, and learned from, besides conjuring up plans to seize their fortunes for herself. She continued toward her—

"PHHHLLLBBBTT!"

She whirled and looked back at the hallway, furious that someone had just given her a raspberry. But there was no one there, except herself. For a moment, she thought Uncle Duncan had stayed behind to tease her, but he wasn't there. It had obviously been someone taller than her, because she distinctly heard the raspberry coming from above her and toward her right. But there was no one there, except her and—

"PHHHLLLBBBTT!"

She jumped back with a start. The raspberry had come from the wall! But there was no one there, either! Just the portraits—

"PHHHLLLBBBTT!"

—and one portrait, of the tycoon she admired most, had just stuck his tongue out at her and given her a raspberry, or at least that's what she _thought_ she saw. This set her heart racing with paranoia. Either Tex slipped something in her drink—

"PHHHHHHHHHHHHHLLLLLLLLLLBBBBBBBBBBBTT!"

The figure in the portrait leaned down and gave the raspberry to her face.

Her colour drained out of her feet one instant before she dashed out of the hallway and into her room one second later, locking herself in. Leaning back on the large double doors, gasping with fear, she kept trying to convince herself that she had _not_ seen what she had just seen. Calming down a trifle, she wiped sweat from her face—or was it saliva? No, (CENSORED) it, it was _sweat_! Looking around her room, she calmed down even more when the familiarity of it slowly sank in.

"Light!"

The chandelier obeyed and illuminated the room: A light brown lush carpet covered the entire floor. Her king size cedar canopy bed, with orange silk covers and curtains, dominated her right. Cedar drawers and closet doors framed the bed, and white silk curtains filtered the moonlight coming in from the balcony doors to the right of the bed. To the left of the balcony were more closets and the entry to her bathroom. On her left was the fireplace, in front of which was another black leather recliner. On the centre of the room was her computer workstation. To the left and right of the entry were more cedar bookcases, filled with books on how to get rich quickly, and others on how to manipulate DNA. A large digital clock was on top of the main doors.

Despite the fact that the room had been designed to help her relax, it did not remove her previous crankiness, fright, or paranoia. The main thing that was out of place, however, was that the fireplace wasn't lit, which explained her shivering. "BEAUREGARD!" she hollered. She changed into her orange silk pyjamas while she waited for the butler to reply. Grovely, her father's butler, had retired several years ago, and a new one came to take his place. Tall, silent, and submissive, he was basically the same as Grovely, only somewhat younger. In charge of the logistics of the mansion, Beauregard should have kept the fireplace going here, the same way he kept it going in her parent's bedroom. And as soon as he got here, she would tell him a thing or two, namely, a demand for an explanation as to why the thermostat didn't kick in at these low temperatures. She was ready for bed now, but no one knocked at her door. "BEAUREGARD! GET YOUR LAZY BUTT OVER HERE!" If he wasn't at her door in thirty seconds, she would have him fired.

Thirty seconds later, the chandelier shut off.

A blackout? But didn't the mansion have its own generator?

Then, bells and chimes began ringing. Odd, didn't Beauregard shut off all the hourly alarms for the night? That lazy bum was slacking off again—

But here, Dakota noticed that the bells weren't coming from her wall clock. Instead, they seemed to be coming from all around her, including the window. What was happening? She ran to shut off the alarm of her digital wall clock and alarm clock, and even her wristwatch, but all of them were off already, and what was more odd was that none of them were set to ring at this hour. The ringing continued all around her, above her, below her, and even through her, seemingly lasting for hours and hours.

She stopped her ears and shut her eyes in a vain effort to stop the noise—

The ringing didn't so much stop as it suddenly faded down to a clanking.

She had seen enough cartoons and movies to identify the sound as being the dragging of a _very_ heavy chain. "B-Beauregard?" she mumbled. The clanking was increasing in volume, and accordingly, so did her heart rate and breathing. Fear and terror gripped her once more when she distinctly identified the noise as coming from _below_ her, near the door, and continuing to approach. "This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this isn't happening…" she mantra'ed to herself, without much success, for the noise drew nearer still. Suddenly she jumped back, thinking that the carpet was on fire. Not that she had felt heat through her bare feet, but she saw wisps of smoke start to billow up from it. The acrid stench of sulphur hit her olfactory bulb, making her eyes water. Then, a burst of smoke exploded through the floor and her door, causing the fireplace to suddenly blaze.

And at last, she saw him.

Though believing in ghosts was part of the curriculum at the Looniversity, this was her first actual encounter with one. The spirit, glowing a pale white-blue, ascended through the floor and the door, rising higher and higher, making her look up in order to meet the horrifying glare it gave her.

She barely managed not to wet herself.

So frightened she was that she could not move at all. All she could do was look at the apparition as it walked toward the fireplace and sat on the recliner. An eternity later, her vocal chords came back on line, but with a distinct cracking. "J—J—Jacob Marley?" was all she could ask, knowing full well the legends of this time of year.

"Actually, no," replied the ghost nonchalantly, and with a slight Texan accent. "Jacob Marley's spirit left the Earth long ago, and sadly, he's now in the place of eternal torment."

"Th—then—who are—?" Before the ghost could reply, "Ask me who I _was_," Dakota received a revelation. The ghost was transparent, like most ghosts she heard about, and apparently a male, with long hair, but he was not dressed in a ragged nineteenth century business suit. Instead, he wore a modern, albeit still quite torn and decayed, business suit, including a tie that was visible through the long beard. What was frightening was the fact that the chains Dakota heard earlier were shackled all over the phantasm's back, arms, and legs, and shackled to the chains were huge bags of gold ingots, coins, and bills. The only non-business attire he had was a bandage on his head that went around his jaw. It was then that the revelation slammed into her mind. Despite the ghost having hair and beard down to his thighs, creepily long fingernails, and hypodermic needles poking from his arms, she recognised the face, one that she had seen hundreds of times before.

"**_HOWARD HUGHES!"_**

"Ah, good, you admitted it. We can cut the cheesy introductions then. Heh, old Marley had to pull off a production before Scrooge finally admitted that he was looking at him."

"And how do _I_ know I'm actually looking at _you_?" she asked, suddenly regaining her obnoxiousness. "I know that Scrooge's story has a bazillion versions, and my enemies just might want to pull one on me." She stepped closer to the ghost. "For all I know, Tex could have slipped something in my soda earlier, and right now I could be sound asleep and dreaming all this."

"Oh? So you don't believe this is really happening?"

"The mind is very complex, Mister Hughes, _if_ that's who you really are," her scowl and attitude returned with a vengeance. "How do I know you're real and not a pizza dream?"

The ghost loosened the bandage on his head, and much to Dakota's fright, that caused his jaw to swing down to his chest, allowing a horrifying shriek to explode from the apparition. After it had echoed into silence, he asked, "Well?"

Perhaps it was the fact that Dakota was used to Anni and The J screaming/roaring in her face, but though she shook with fright, she stood her ground. "I've seen movies with scarier screams than that!"

(WHAM!)

The ghost looked at the floor, which now had a flattened teenager under an ethereal mallet he had pulled out of nowhere. Removing it, he asked, "Real enough?"

"…okay…" she replied, muffled.

(POP!")

Education works wonders, she thought, as she popped back to her normal shape. Her scowl and attitude took a slight step back to allow fright and terror to step forward, or at least, just enough to treat the apparition with more respect. "Okay, so you're real," she admitted. "But why are you here? You were never my partner, as Scrooge was with Marley! You died long before I was born!"

"True, I died the year your _father_ was born, though I did have plenty of dealings with your grandfather, that is, your father's father. Nevertheless, you read my biography, and I became your role model. Like your father and grandfather, you admired me and all the work I did, and the fortune I gathered. You wanted to be more than me, your father, and grandfather combined."

Okay, this was getting creepy. "How do _you_ know that?"

The ghost sighed again. "The spiritual world has better communication than this one, Dee. I've been beside you in your office several times, though. How is it that you can see me now, I don't know. But when I learned that you were trying to follow in my footsteps, my torment increased ten-fold."

Eyebrow. "Torment? Why? What do my goals of riches have to do with you? I may have looked up to you, but who wouldn't? You were the best businessman since Rockefeller—"

"'**_BUSINESS!'"_** A sudden shriek silenced the girl, making her cower down in front of the screaming phantasm. _"'Mankind was my business. The common welfare was my business; charity, mercy, forbearance, and benevolence, were, all, my business. The dealings of my trade were but a drop of water in the comprehensive ocean of my business!'"_ Then, he sat back, calmly. "Wow. Jacob Marley couldn't have put it better. But what he said is true. Humanity was my business, as is yours, _besides_ toonity."

"Huh?"

"And my torment continues, because I see my legacy passing before me."

"Mister Hughes, what are you talking about?"

"Dee, you don't know the torment it is for me to see a young life be corrupted because of my actions, no matter how long ago I did them. And now, you and others suffer because of the example I set." The female just looked at him, seemingly unable to comprehend. "I thought that my punishment would stop accumulating once I died, but I was wrong. The dividends will continue to accumulate until the end of time: reaching returns of 3,000, 6,000, and 10,000 per cent. Not even Marley had it this bad; he had Scrooge, and because Scrooge turned to the Light, one speck of punishment was removed from Marley. I had no one."

"Hold it, hold it," she interrupted. "You speak of Marley and Scrooge as if they were—"

"Real," he leaned toward her. "Yes, Dee, they were real, in every way. Perhaps their original names were different, but they were real, and even more so because they lived in Reality, not Toonity. Ebenezer later talked to Charles Dickens and told him his story, which he then wrote."

Now this was getting _very_ frightening. "So, if all of it was real, then you're here to warn me?"

"Oh yes. As it happened with Scrooge and Marley, and me, three ghosts will come to visit you, and you _know_ when they will come: the first at one a.m. tomorrow night, the next one at two a.m. the next night, and the third at midnight of the third night. I suggest you do as they say, or you will end up worse than me. The chains you see here were custom built by me, for me, but I didn't know that until I died. And right now, the chains _you_ have built are as long as these, which is _very_ frightening, considering you're barely a teenager, and not an old miser as we were. If you continue the path you've chosen, you just _might_ cut yourself off before the prime of life, and you'll end up just like me and Marley: endlessly wandering the Earth, seeing those we could have helped, and cannot help now, in order to make amends. Even I, who travelled the world, didn't do what was required of me. And you know how I ended up: holed up in a room in Las Vegas. It's too late for me to fix what I did, as it was for Marley, and it will be for you, if you don't do as the spirits tell you. And just like Marley, I suffer most during this time of the year, because I see everywhere people giving, even what little they have, and I have all this wealth shackled to me, and I can't give anyone a dime. That is my torture, as it was Marley's, and it will be yours, too, if you don't change your ways." Hughes looked at the wall clock, and concluded, "Well, I must go now. I can't stay in one place for too long. That is part of my punishment as well." With a resigned sigh, he looked toward the balcony. "Until the end of time, I will continue to walk down the path of my father—" He tied the bandage around his head again, and looked at her eyes, "—and _your_ father as well."

At that, the trance was broken, and she blurted, "Huh? What? But my father isn't dead yet!"

He stood. "Oh, I'm not talking about him. You see, we both chose the same father, and it's not Howard Hughes, Sr., nor is it Montana Maximilian."

She stepped closer, "Mister Hughes, what are you talking about?"

He leaned down at her and declared dramatically, "Dee, I'm talking about my father, and _your_ father: **_JACOB MARLEY_**."

There were many things that Dakota had been forced to accept in this encounter, but insulting her family was one thing she would NOT take. "MARLEY ISN'T MY FATHER!" she screamed. "If he was real, then he left behind no descendants, and you didn't either! I may not know Scrooge's story by heart, but one thing I DO know is that Marley died unmarried and without children! And even if he did, I'm a toon, and he was real! There's no way I could be his descendant!"

Hughes just smiled. "Dee, the words 'father', 'mother', 'son', and 'daughter', don't always refer only to those who share similar DNA. They also mean 'role model' and 'successor', and 'he or she who carries on the walk and works of someone else'. Neither Marley nor I may have sired sons and daughters, but those who do our works _become_ our sons and daughters, and you don't know how much we wish that we had left behind _no_ legacy for _anyone_ to follow. But if you walk the path and do the works of Jacob Marley, then you are Jacob Marley's Daughter."

Her rage exploded at that declaration. **_"I AM THE DAUGHTER OF MONTANA MAX!"_**

Hughes insisted, "Montana, too, follows the path of his father. He chose me as a father as well, besides having his own biological father, who _also_ chose me and walks my path, just as I unknowingly chose Jacob Marley as my father."

Here, she noticed a discrepancy. "Wait a minute, if my father and grandfather are doing the same thing you and Marley did, then why haven't _they_ got visits like these? Why me _now_, and not when I'm really old?"

"Their works of evil and greed have not yet reached the critical point that would merit a visit such as this one, and what frightens me is that your father, grandfather, Marley, Scrooge, _and_ me, put together, have not done HALF of all the evil you've done until now. And you're barely a teenager, which means that your cut-off point has been moved to a much earlier date than expected." The look on the humanmaid's face declared that the statement had gone clearly over her head. "Dee, you burned the Words of Warning, but that doesn't make them ineffective against you. The ghosts will try to persuade you to choose another father, for your own good, and for a better eternity than what I will have." He stood and walked toward the balcony, but stopped and turned, "Choose another father, Dee, or the Words you read will become truer than you could ever fathom, and they will become true much earlier than you think. Cutting you off much earlier will actually be a _favour_ toward you, because if you grow old unchanged, the punishment you will get will be _infinitely_ greater than mine or Marley's combined." The balcony doors suddenly flew open, letting in a freezing blast of wind into the room, making Hughes' decayed suit billow eerily. He walked backward, ready to fly away. "Let my eternity, and our father's, be a warning to yo—"

(SHOOF—WHEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…)

Dakota dashed to the rampart, quite shocked at seeing the ghost fall off the balcony like Professor Wile did in his old shorts. As soon as she looked down, though, Hughes' ghost suddenly shot back up to her face and quipped, "Spooky, ain't it?"

(SHOOF—WHEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…thud)

He finally fell on the snow five stories below, with a muffled thud. And though the mansion was surrounded by large tracts of land, and the estate by a large fence, in the distance just outside the fence she distinctly saw even more ghosts of past figures, some of which were on the hall portraits, all shackled, and all trying to help the living needy, without success. She thought she saw a ghost try to give a stray cat a bone or something, but the spirit was bound to an ATM, unable to reach it. Shackled spirits were all around the perimeter of the estate, and since she was on the top floor, she could see them all around, crying, wailing, and shrieking in torment, unable to help those in need. Panic overcame her again, so she dashed back inside, slammed shut the balcony doors, and barricaded them with two-by-fours and padlocks. Leaning back against them, catching her breath, she looked at her room again.

The chair was intact, the floor and main doors were also untouched, and the fireplace was dark. No trace of sulphur remained. Had it all been a dream? Did she have a very strange hallucination?

Suddenly feeling very exhausted, she shuffled to her bed. As she threw the covers back, she glanced at her digital wall clock.

23:58:55

_Sheesh, it's nearly midnight. No wonder I'm seeing thi—_

Suddenly sitting up and glaring at the clock, she saw that it was nearly midnight.

Of the next day.

The clock declared that exactly twenty-four hours had passed since she entered her bedroom, apparently without her knowing it. Did she sleep for twenty-four hours? And if she did, why didn't Beauregard, her mother, or her father wake her up? If she had indeed slept for an entire day, that meant she missed a crucial day of working! She would have some serious catching up to do—and layoffs to do as well—in the morning. But because of the previous visitation, as much as she tried, she simply couldn't fall asleep. She just lay on her left side contemplating the endless blinking of the wall clock as it paced one second at a time.

She couldn't sleep.

For an entire hour, she glared at the clock with bloodshot eyes, the visitation repeating endlessly in her head, and its implications bringing terror to her, expelling whatever somnolescence had previously attempted to surface.

Finally, the clock struck ONE.


	6. Stave 3: The First of the Three Spirits

STAVE THREE - THE FIRST OF THE THREE SPIRITS

Though more than struck, it actually chimed the hour. Dakota sat up and was about to call Beauregard and order him to turn off the hourly chime so that it wouldn't go off an hour lat—

"DAUGHTER OF JACOB MARLEY."

Slowly, the teenager turned.

And then, she saw the ghost.

Her temporal disarray was further disarrayed when she examined him, however.

Standing next to her bed was a male ghost, quite muscular, yet middle-aged. He was at least two metres tall (6'6"), his long brown hair curling down to his shoulders, and his beard down to his chest. He wore a regal green robe with white furred borders, quite large, yet not enough to close on his muscular chest. His brown belt appeared to have a holster of some sort, perhaps a sword scabbard? A beautiful holly wreath, girded with diamond icicles, crowned his head. With his left hand, he held up an old lantern that shone so brightly it made the humanmaid's eyes hurt, to the point of making her want to blow it out with something—anything. And with his right, he had pulled back the orange silk bed curtain to address her. Like Dakota, he was currently barefoot.

Dakota didn't know what to make of him. Sure, he seemed friendly, perhaps even fatherly, but something here was quite amiss. "I thought I was first going to see the Ghost of Christmas Past," she stated.

"You're meeting him now," he replied, with a fatherly voice.

"No, you're Christmas _Present_," she insisted. "Aren't you supposed to be—um—well, _shorter_ and dressed in white?"

"Oh, no," he explained. "That ghost was of Scrooge's past. What you see before you is the form that appeared to him and Marley as Christmas Present, but now, their present is your past."

She just looked at him. "And where's all the food that was brought to Scrooge?"

"That will come later."

She looked at him with haughtiness. "Okay, so you're Christmas Past. Now what?" Without a word, the ghost grabbed Dakota by the back of her shirt and hoisted her off the bed. "Ow! Hey, what are you doing!" she protested as he carried her to the balcony. With a swift kick, the doors fell outward, and he proceeded to walk off the balcony, as Howard Hughes had done earlier. "Whoa, wait! I may be a toon, but hitting the ground still stings! Put me down, you pathetic poltergeist! Put me—AAAAHHH!" They fell off the balcony, but landed on the snow an instant later as if they had stepped off a sidewalk. He dropped her on the snow rather indignantly, making her sit on it rather hard. Immediately she scrambled to her feet, not noticing that she didn't feel cold despite the fact that she was only wearing her pyjamas. Thrusting her finger to his face, or at least in its general direction, she bellowed, "You are in a LOT of trouble! I can call the Ghostbusters and they'll ship you off to—!"

Once again, she noticed something was amiss. Her mansion was gone, as was her yard, and even the entire estate. Instead, she was in another large estate. "What is the meaning of—hey, I know this place!"

"Do you now?"

"Of course", she replied, her scowl reappearing on her face. "This is Soho Junior Academy! How I hated this place!"

"You did? Why?"

"I never wanted to come here. I just wanted to go to the Looniversity and be funny, but 'nooooo,' said my dad, 'you must first learn how to behave like the rich!' Once Soho Prep opened an elementary, he decided to start a family tradition to send the kids here first. But I managed to survive." At this point, several boys and girls of various species, including human, approached them. Their uniforms were more like business suits, with charcoal jackets, pants or skirts, and a dark blue tie. The group dashed past them, apparently ignoring the two odd visitors.

"As Scrooge was in his visits, we are now invisible, inaudible, impalpable, and inolfactable."

"Somehow I knew that." More boys and girls ran past them, making Dakota squint as her memory overhauled itself.

"Trying to remember old friends? It wasn't that long ago, you know." said the apparition.

She scowled again and crossed her arms. "Bah. I hated everyone and everything here. No one was worth my time, or my memory space." The ghost looked sadly at her, and pulled down the scenery.

They were now in the library, watching a very sad little girl sitting all by herself at one of the tables. A book cart was beside her, and as she looked at it with teary eyes, a particular book caught her attention. She took it and examined it for a second, and then began reading. Several minutes later, her pout was replaced with a _very_ evil smile.

The title of the book was "The Life and Times of Howard Hughes".

"That was a sad turning point," sighed the ghost, pulling down the scenery to another point of Dakota's past at Soho.

When Dakota saw the next scene, she smiled and put her hands on her hips, "Sad? Why would you say that? I merely discovered a way to make my stay here worthwhile." In a polo court, several children were surrounding an eight-year-old Dakota, and all of them had money in their hands/paws/wings.

And the girl was smiling like never before.

"Fifty pounds for a doctor's note. Take it or leave it," she said.

The snobbish grey rabbit in front of her grunted with anger, and silently agreed with the price, shoving her a fifty-pound note while she gave him a falsified doctor's note which would excuse the buck from football. With his ears stiff behind him, he stomped away. "Now who was next? Oh yes, you needed three hall passes for tomorrow, here you go, it's a pleasure doing business with you as long as you give me money, hee hee, and you? Oh yes, 100 pounds for your report card: your parents are going to be _so_ proud of you. Oh, and here's your report, that will be thirty pounds because I had to include misspellings. Okay, now you—hey, don't look at me like that! This little paper has YOUR handwriting in it, so I could throw the blame on YOU if I so choose! Now hand over the cash!"

The teenager was looking smugly at the child. "I learned how to do profitable business very early and very fast, don't you think?"

The ghost glared down, "You learned how to cheat, blackmail, and embezzle—very early and very fast! Many children feared you, and you enjoyed that, but that was simply to compensate for the attention your parents didn't give you." Dakota just humphed at that, and would have enjoyed watching more shady dealings continue, but the ghost pulled down the scenery to another time and place.

Now they were inside a dorm, where the young Dakota had just cleaned out another customer, and she was happily counting her money on her bed. Then, a relative of hers entered the room just as the now broke female red squirrel exited. "Dee?"

She didn't bother looking up. "Not now, Uncle Duncan. I have to make sure I have enough for my next investment."

The male walked up to the bed. "Dee, you're every bit like your father. But I have good news! Your mother finally convinced your father to have you attend school in Acme Acres! Your dad sent me to take you home!"

The child looked up. "No thanks, Uncle Duncan. I finally figured out what I want to be when I grow up. I'm doing great business here, so I will stay here."

The teenager commented on this, "Heh. Only when my father saw that I was just as good a businesstoon as he was did he finally decide to send me home. He even sent someone to take over my little business here so that it wouldn't go to waste."

Duncan leaned down and stopped the money counting by placing his hand on Dakota's. "Dee, you have to come home with me, otherwise your dad will be very upset."

The child protested, "Oh? Then why didn't he or mom come and pick me up? Do they _really_ want me home?"

"Now, now, Dee. You know your mom gets lost just going shopping, and your father is busy preparing your transfer. Now come on. I'll help you pack your stuff."

"But what about all the dealings that I still have pending?" she protested.

"Oh, don't worry. Your dad sent someone with me to deal with those. Trust me, he's the best!" Both looked at the door as Dakota's replacement strutted in, also wearing the school uniform.

"Buckawk!"

"I sure hope so," she scowled.

Somewhere out in the hall, a child exclaimed, "He's a chicken, I tell you! A giant chicken!"

"And he's still doing business in Soho," quipped the teenager. "He sends his quarterly reports right on time!" As the ghost pulled down the scenery, she added, "Though I never was able to establish something similar at the Looney Elementary."

The next scene was precisely at the Looney Elementary, inside a classroom, Yosemite Sam's, to be exact. But there was no class in progress; instead, the Christmas party was in full swing. Here, she had no choice but to remember her classmates, since she still saw them practically every day. There was herself, slightly older than she was in England. She didn't have a uniform here, just a dark blue dress and white sneakers. Also in the class were Junior, Alexi, Miriam, Tex, Friz, Shotsy, The J, and several others.

"All right, you varmints! It's time to exchange presents!" Despite his normal rashness, Yosemite Sam seemed to be very happy, and appeared to be enjoying the party as well. "Now, sit down and don't twitch a whisker until I call your name! Then get yourself up here and take your present, is that clear!"

"Yes, Professor Sam!" hollered the entire class, instantly sitting down, eagerly watching the huge pile of presents on the teacher's desk.

Sam grabbed the first one and read the tag, "All right! This here's for Alexi!"

As the grey doe bounded up to get her present, two toons in the back, sitting next to each other, talked to themselves. "You know," said The J, "if the school picks up all of the leftover wrappings and shreds them, they could save a fortune on the confetti if they sell it for New Years."

"Or, _we_ could pick that up, and sell it to individual suppliers and make some profits for ourselves," added the young Dakota.

J turned to her. "I hope my 'exchangee' likes what I bought. I really didn't want to buy the first thing I saw, so I looked around a bit and found something that could be _very_ productive."

"Really—?" Dakota turned and looked at the feline's eyes, and was about to comment on bargain hunting and possible profit for herself on something she got somebody else, but her vocal chords appeared to have suddenly failed.

"Yes, really, Dee. You know, it's amazing what great prices you can find if you know where to look." The young Caucasian just stared at the Mexican-American, and kept on staring. "Dee?"

Finally, her speech powers returned, "Whoa, baby! Where have you been all my life?"

This brought confusion to him for a moment. "Huh? Well, for starters, I've lived here all my life, and from what I've heard, you were in England until last year—"

"J?" she asked, as femininely as she could muster for her young age, complete with eye flutter. "How would you like to be my business partner? With my money, and both of our brains, I think that we can go far. REALLY far," she leaned toward him.

J leaned toward her as well, _quite_ interested in making a possible deal with her, but before he could say a word, a troop of younger furry toons entered the classroom. "Cake and ice cream! Cake and ice cream!" hollered a slightly less buff Morty Bunny, pulling a small refrigerated cart. Some of the younger classes had been assigned to hand out desserts to other classrooms, and to do it in a very jolly way. Among the toons in the troop were Nolan, Bekki, June, Hunni, and a reluctant and scowling blue doe with a yellow blouse and orange dress.

"Stupid teachers," murmured Anni, ears stiff behind her, as toons gathered up for dessert. "Each class should get its own food and not do something as ridiculous as this!" She was stomping and throwing scoops of ice cream on the student's plates, splattering a bit, and really didn't care for that, until she looked up and saw that The J was in front of her.

She froze in mid-throw.

"Well now, this is interesting," he purred, looking at her almond-brown eyes. "I wonder what the Local Bully did to deserve this?"

The angry lagomorph suddenly snapped out of whatever had taken over her, and threw the ice cream on his plate. "None of your beeswax, Blackie!"

Dakota, who was beside J, asked, "Pushed down one too many nerds, Barbara Anne?"

Anni stomped, "You'll be the one pushing up daisies if you don't watch your mouth, brat!" Both were about to jump at each other, but fortunately, the panther pulled the humanmaid away, while the semi-muscular pink buck pulled his sister away.

It was here that the teen Dakota noticed that as they padded away, J and Anni kept looking at each other.

Also, Bekki was looking at Nolan, whose attention was immersed in a Christmas card that he was preparing for The M, but no one noticed.

The ghost commented, "It was during this Christmas that you saw that The J had incredible business potential—potential that you wanted to exploit for yourself, but everyone thought that you had simply fallen in love with him, which you hadn't."

The teenager scoffed at him, "I really don't need that reminder, Casper."

"Do you now? Dee, you were so wrapped up in your own plans that you completely missed someone who had just laid their eyes on _you_." The pyjama-clad toon looked around but didn't see anyone that even remotely appeared to be doing what the ghost claimed to have been doing—

—until she saw Tex, way on the opposite side of the classroom. The herbivore followed the girl's every move, even as she sat down with the carnivore to discuss business.

"He has ogled you from the moment you stepped into his life, Dee. But you never noticed."

"Yeah, right, as if I would want to be romantically involved with a cream puff rabbit!" She turned to him, "And with all that my dad—AND Professors Sam and Fudd—went through before, I doubt he would allow it. Besides, I already had someone else in mind for me." The ghost said nothing, but instead pulled down the scenery.

Now, they were in the middle of Acme Forest, currently blanketed by snow. Dakota looked around, and saw herself, wearing black mittens, a dark blue winter jacket and matching pants; and J, wearing a white jacket and trousers. This time, however, they were in less than amiable spirits.

"No, Dakota."

She blinked. "What do you mean 'NO'? I'M DAKOTA DEE! NO ONE TELLS ME 'NO' ABOUT _ANYTHING_!"

Fangs flashed, ears flattened, and a tail twitched, "Dakota, don't get me wrong. I want to make tons of money just as much as you do, but I will NOT do it if it means breaking the law and committing fraud!"

The younger humanmaid's fists trembled with rage. "J, stop those nonsense morals of yours! Your parents just don't want you to have fun making money by bending the rules! And do you know why?" She stepped closer and said to his face, "Because they know that if you get rich faster than they did, and if your assets surpass theirs, then they'll know they are nothing but financial failures!"

The panther didn't buy that, and growled in her face, "Mom and Dad made money the RIGHT way, Dakota! And the reason why I'm saying NO to YOU is because of what they and I believe in!"

She flopped her arms. "Oh, great. Your religion again. You know, J, religion should be banned from business! It does nothing but block profits!"

"You _wish_ this was about religion, Dakota. But this goes _beyond_ a simple 'thou shalt not steal'. This is about what we BOTH know is right and wrong, and what you're asking me to do, by the simplest logic, is COMPLETELY _WRONG_!"

"WHO CARES!" she screamed back in his face.

The Mexican-American stood back, huffing; his breath condensing in his whiskers. "I care, Dakota. I care more than you can possibly imagine. And even if we _could_ get away with it, and my parents never found out, I will not betray their trust, AND, I will not betray Him Who I wait for!" He reached inside his jacket and pulled out his gold chain with the Cross and Star, much like his father's.

The young Caucasian was even more furious now, so she dragged her foot across the snow, making a line, and gave him her ultimatum. "J, this is your last chance. Leave your pathetic religion, deny yourself and your parents, and follow me. If you do, we'll both become richer than Howard Hughes, The Rockefellers, Bill Gates, Steven Spielberg, AND my dad and grandpa combined! I made this line, and I dare you to cross it to come and follow me, but I will NOT cross it to follow you and your pathetic beliefs and ethics!"

"Sounds familiar, doesn't it?" asked the ghost. The teenager said nothing, stunned at the parallel she had so long pushed into a suppressed memory. "Amazing how history repeats itself, don't you think?"

J looked at the line, and sadly looked up at her. After a moment, he calmly declared, "Good-bye, Dakota. You don't know how much it pains me to see you choose the Dark Side and the Wide Meandering Path, because I cannot walk it. I chose the Bright Side and the Straight and Narrow Path long ago, and I won't go back, because I know what waits for me at the end. I'll pray that you will see the Light someday." Wiping his eyes, the black panther turned and padded away.

Dakota watched as her younger self became stunned at having been denied something so huge so bluntly. The younger one called out, "J, wait!" The male stopped, but didn't turn around. "You know, it doesn't have to end like this! You know we've been though a lot together, right?" No reply. "Well, I know that we have trusted each other on many things, but you left out one thing that you were going to tell me." The cub still stood there, tail twitching. "Look, before you leave, just tell me your complete name, and then we'll go our separate ways, okay?" Tail still twitching, he resumed padding away from her. She insisted, "I'll _pay_ you if you tell me your name! J? J! Stop! You won't believe how rich you can be if you just tell me your name! J?" He became smaller and smaller. Fists trembled again, "**_J_**! I _will_ find out your name, J! One way or another, I WILL know! AND ON THAT DAY, I WILL CURSE YOUR REAL NAME AND YOUR RELIGION!" By the time Dakota finished screaming, the young onça was out of sight. **_"I WILL TAKE YOUR HIDE AND USE IT FOR PYJAMAS!"_**

The teenager turned, also with clenched fists, and hissed, "I've seen enough! Get me out of here!"

The ghost spoke, "This is when you ratified your decision of walking the path of evil. You couldn't buy The J's love, loyalty, or talent, much less his real name."

She grabbed his robe and tried to pull him down, but instead lifted herself up to his face, "I SAID I HAD ENOUGH!"

He just smiled, "You never loved him, Dee, because you couldn't be happy with the choice he had made, nor with the female he chose." With the humanmaid hanging from his robe, he pulled down the scenery.

"What do you mean you refuse!"

Back inside the halls of the Loony Elementary, Dakota saw an angry blue doe getting very much into J's face.

The black panther just stood there, ears back, glaring at her. "You heard me. I don't have to prove anything to you or anyone, Anni. But if you don't like me _not_ letting you push me around, that's just too bad for you. Any fight would prove nothing. Now, excuse me, I have to get to class."

This wasn't looking good for the female, if she wanted to keep her bully image. "Why do you refuse, J? Are you afraid you're going to get beat up by a little girl?"

Onlookers "ooh'ed" at that, but the male returned, "Or, maybe I'm afraid of putting you in the hospital, but I guess you'll never know, will you?" The doe fumed at that. "But why do you want to fight to prove dominance? You _know_ that even the teachers outrank you."

She pointed at him, "The problem is that YOU think YOU outrank ME! Why else would you back down from my challenges? Why else would you defy me?"

"Because I'm trying to ignore you? Because I don't want to take part of this silly ranking system of yours?"

Anni didn't know how to counter that, so she watched him pad off to class. But then, a white LED lit above her, and a very sly smile exhibited her dental work to the world. "Okay, it _doesn't_ have to be for ranks, J!"

He stopped and turned, "Oh?"

Smiling, but still with her ears stiff behind her, she explained, "Let's say that I don't want to fight you in order to prove who's the alpha around here. Let's say that I simply want some—well—some 'competition', if you will. You wouldn't be my enemy, adversary, or nemesis; you'd simply be my opponent: someone to measure up against."

His tail curled with curiosity, and he straightened his ears. "Like a sparring partner?"

"Or more, if you wish, but now that you mention it, I kinda _do_ need a new sparring partner. Morty has been getting rather sore lately."

"Sounds interesting, but if you want to—compete—then we'll compete in everything else, _not just in boxing_. Would you also go against me in chess, karate, and other disciplines?"

She stiffly stomped up to him, smiling, "Anything, anytime, anyplace, cat."

He smiled too, showing his carnivorous dental work, making her heart jump with fear, despite her efforts to maintain a fearsome face. "Then you have a deal, doe." And both shook paws.

The female teenager watched this scene with boredom, but then stood back as the next scenes were actually a montage played with the "War" theme from "Rocky IV". The scenes included J moving a black bishop to set a checkmate, and then it changed to him moving a white knight again for the checkmate, causing the lagomorph to angrily throw the game board and the pieces in the air. The same thing happened after taking the final checker, and making the last move in Backgammon. The scenes continued with him shoving her arm down, winning at arm wrestling, shoving down her _other_ arm, and then pinning her down in Greco-roman wrestling. Finally, they were in a boxing ring, with full protective gear; The J clad in white shorts, and Anni in orange shorts and top. At first, they appeared to be doing some _very_ intense boxing, and suddenly Anni fell to her side in a technical knockout. Then they were fighting Judo with gi's, with J in white and Anni in yellow, and the jaguar cub back flipped the doe to the mat; then some scenes with karate, where J kicked her legs under her and she dropped to the mat again; and finally, with a large audience, they were now kickboxing.

Dakota watched as they bounced around the ring, punching and kicking, but the cub was moving too fast for the doe to land any hard blows. The bout went on and on, with Anni barely scoring a hit, and J having problems getting past her defence, and blocking her fierce kicks, for she had apparently inherited her mother's legs. Finally, the herbivore had the carnivore cornered, and with a final swing, she threw an uppercut to his chin.

(WARPUNWARP!)

And made a complete miss.

And the panther was no longer in front of her?

Suddenly, she whirled—

(KAWHAMSLASH!)

—right onto a double flying kick to the jaw, with a tail lash to top it off.

At that moment, everything and everyone hushed and moved in slow motion.

Anni fell back and bounced on the ropes. For a moment, as she bounced forward, Anni looked at The J's eyes, expressing mute resignation and disappointment. Finally, her eyes rolled up, and she fell on her face.

The J weakly raised his right fist in victory.

All of Anni's brothers and sisters, and her parents, cried in mute agony. The J's parents and sister stood, threw their fists up, and screamed/roared in mute victory. The rest of the audience, especially all the weaklings, nerds, and geeks, also joined in the mute celebration.

At this, Dakota also felt quite satisfied that a Bunny had finally been defeated and humiliated in such a manner, but a sudden change of scenery halted the smugness like a brick wall.

The celebrations were over, the audience had gone home, and the combatants were in their orange and white winter gear as they painfully padded through the snowed forest. Swollen portions of their faces and a band-aid here and there proclaimed it to have been a gruelling fight. Anni had her head slightly downcast, and her ears were bent back a bit, now displaying slight fear toward her companion.

For the first time in her life, she feared someone.

Also, her nervousness was quite evident in her speech. "You—you know, J—those were—um—really good workouts we had—especially today."

The J's tail dragged behind him. "I know. But we're going to be as sore as bleep in the morning, I tell you that!"

The doe remained quiet for a moment, and then asked, "J?"

"Yes?"

"I—um—if you want to—well—I'd like—to continue the workouts—and—and all the competition. I know—I know now that you're—you're—(grunting)—better than me—but—but—that doesn't mean—well—that we can't—we can't—um—train—with each other."

"Sounds fine to me. I never knew you could take so much, and I'll tell you, I had to pull a lot of advanced stuff on you! I'm really impressed!"

"Impressed? J, you—you—you really impressed _me_! I mean—well—I never—never fought—anyone—who could take all that I could dish out, and _man_ did I dish out everything I had! Well, what I'm trying to say is—is—that I—um—need someone like you—to help me—" She suddenly stopped and held the panther's arm, halting him as well. She leaned closer, leaning her ears toward him, "You—you can—um—can you be my sparring?"

He leaned closer too, suddenly seeing something in her almond-brown eyes he had not seen before. "Better—better yet—Anni—you can be mine—"

The moment their furry muzzles pressed together, Dakota screamed at the apparition, "I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!"

He looked down at her, smiling, and as he replied, his torch grew brighter and brighter, "You still can't accept the fact that you never loved him, otherwise you would be happy for him now."

"GET ME THE (CENSORED) OUTTA HERE, YOU PATHETIC POLTERGEIST!"

The torch shone brighter, "By the way, you burned the Book, but there is one segment you need to read. It's not in red, but it's important anyway." He handed her a note, but she refused to take it.

The torch was so bright that it made her eyes hurt. "SHUUUUUUUT UUUUUPPPP!"

His smile was lost in the light. "'Search your feelings; you know it to be true'."

"**_SHHHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTT UUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPP!"_** With a final scream, she pulled out a fire extinguisher and blasted the torch.

When the carbon dioxide cloud cleared, she saw that she had just emptied an extinguisher on her chandelier, and that she was panting with spent rage.

The sudden quiet scared her; making her wonder if her screams had awakened her parents, despite the fact that their bedroom was on the opposite side of the mansion, but no one came to the door. For a moment, she thought about calling them and telling them about this, but the fact that she was a teenager, and a proud one at that, reminded her that it would not look good for her to go crying to mommy and/or daddy because of a nightmare.

Was that what she had just now? A nightmare?

She looked around her room, and saw that it was still the same way she left it. No chilly air hinted that the balcony had been opened, the fireplace was still out, and there was no one else around but her.

She was scared, though. Something was making her shiver, and it wasn't any memories of cold air. But still, her previous display of emotion had taken a lot out of her, and scared as she was, she flopped on her bed and instantly fell asleep.


	7. Stave 4: The Second of the Three Spirits

STAVE FOUR - THE SECOND OF THE THREE SPIRITS

She awoke with a start when the clock on her wall chimed that it was one a.m. again. Shakily looking up at the timepiece, she saw that she had slept for twenty-four hours _again_. Either there was something wrong with current time and space, or she was having a ridiculously long dream. Once again, she lay on her bed, wide-awake, watching the clock slowly advance; her trembling slowly subsiding. As she did, she considered her previous experience.

Who did that ghost think he was, telling her what she felt and what she didn't? She knew she loved The J at one time, as much as she loved her money, but the difference was that money never betrayed her, unlike that miserable feline. From her discovery of her talents in Soho, she had worked hard to reach the status she had now. It was rare when she asked her father for money, much to his delight, though the recent depletion in his factory's energy reserves had put a strain on their already distant relationship. Still, she had paid him back, with interest, proving to him that she was more than capable of rescuing her own finances without asking for help.

Though again, she wished that The J had been there. What a deficit he was turning out for himself!

Looking at the clock again, she realised that if the whole experience was going to play through, then that meant that there was another ghost coming up at the top of the hour. But if Christmas Past, who originally was Scrooge's Christmas Present, had already appeared, then who—or what—was going to be _her_ Present? Was she going to be hauled away to see how the "peasants" lived their holidays?

Well, not if she could help it.

She got up and was about to leave—

—when she saw a piece of paper on the floor.

Normally, Beauregard kept her room spotless, so this obviously wasn't a screw-up on his part. Suddenly she remembered that in his last moments with her, the ghost tried to give her a note, and the memory of that event was suddenly sticking out in her mind, almost unwillingly. And almost unwillingly as well, she picked it up and held it to the light that was coming in through the balcony doors.

"Come now, you rich! Weep and howl, for your miseries that are coming upon you! Your riches are decayed, and your garments are eaten by moths! Your gold and silver are corroded, and their corrosion will be a witness against you and will consume your flesh like fire. You have heaped up 'treasure' in the last days. Indeed: the wages of the workers who mowed your fields—which you kept back by FRAUD—cry out; and the cries of the reapers have reached the ears of the Master of The Armies! You have lived on Earth in pleasure and luxury; you have fattened your hearts as if it were time for the slaughterhouse!"

That was enough to frighten her even further, but when she read the next phrase, her colour drained completely:

"You have condemned—you have murdered the just! He does not resist you—"

She suddenly dropped the note as if it were on fire, and backed away from it as if it were a lion.

Still pale, she _knew_ that she had murdered The J, The M, _and_ The J.A.M., despite the fact that all of that happened in another timeline and no one remembered it.

But now it seemed as if Someone _did_ remember, and was now about to hold her accountable for her actions.

A sudden crackling from the fireplace made her gasp. Despite the low light, she saw fragments of soot and ash falling from the chimney. She dashed toward the door, but no sooner had she touched the knob when—

The clock struck TWO.

She froze in place to glance up at the clock. The moment she did, the fireplace lit up again, and a booming voice, well, boomed, behind her, "HO HO HO! MERRY CHRISTMAS, DAUGHTER OF JACOB MARLEY! HO HO HO!" She had heard that voice before so many times in so many Christmas specials and street corners and never gave it much thought, but this time it seemed to resonate through her body. She knew exactly who was standing behind her, and though it was quite surprising to have him visit her now, nothing could have prepared her for what she saw when she turned around.

(CLANG!)

For starters, her room suddenly seemed ten times larger than it was before. Secondly, there was a HUGE banquet table next to her bed. The food was served: many meat delicacies piping hot, many desserts glowing with sugar, many types of pastries and ice creams glistening with moisture, and many salads crisp and tossed. It was as if cooks from all over the world had come together to prepare meals for every culture known to toonkind. And, either her eyes were deceiving her, or one of the dishes served was indeed a roasted camel.

That in itself made her quite hungry, but the person who apparently brought the banquet, and what he brought the banquet _with_, was even more impressive, despite the fact that she knew who he was, and what his method of transport was.

Nine reindeer stood three metres (9'10") at the shoulder: eight were side by side, and one was in the lead. Their brown leather harnesses and bridles were lined with gold, and gold bells clung to them. Every hair on their fur was in perfect place, and not a single blemish was on them. Their antlers were all different, but all seemed perfect in every turn and point. Different white markings were on their foreheads, except for the lead reindeer, who had none, though his nose was so red it almost looked like a large LED. The reindeer were attached to what Dakota could only describe as a red sleigh, but it was the size of a bus. Perfectly polished and waxed, it glinted off the moonlight and firelight. On the back of the sleigh was an incredibly huge red bag; the rim lined with white fur and stitched with gold. Something inside was giving off light, though.

And on the front seat of the sleigh sat the Ghost of Christmas Present.

**_"SANTA CLAUS!"_** blurted the humanmaid, after lifting her jaw back into place.

"If you wish to call me that," he boomed. "It took me a while to get used to that particular distortion of my original name." Then, he stepped off the sleigh, standing 3.5 metres tall (11'5"). He was wearing the traditional red suit lined with white fur, black gloves, black boots, black belt, and red hat, but a closer inspection revealed that the seams were gold lined. He wasn't overly obese, but a combination of Nordic musculature and a round abdomen made him look like a water tank. His long silvery hair curled perfectly on his shoulders, and his long beard blended with the white fur of his jacket. Though he was from the present, and no wrinkles were on his face, his blue eyes seemed ancient.

He walked to the third reindeer pair to adjust a loose harness, and as he did, Dakota asked incredulously, "Let me get this straight: _you_ are the Ghost of Christmas Present?"

"Exactly."

"And it's Christmas already?"

"Exactly."

For the love of Bill Gates, how long had she been sleeping? "So, I guess this banquet is my present?" she asked, with slight expectation.

He turned, "Oh, no, the banquet is to share with others. After all, you couldn't possibly eat it all by yourself, now can you?"

She turned to the huge table, barely able to see the opposite end. "No, I suppose not."

The ghost noticed something in her tone of voice, "Disappointed that you actually have to _share_, Dee?"

The brunette smirked back at him, "Or, I could buy a huge freezer to store all of this. My family would never have to buy food until the end of the century, Santa." He turned and looked down at her, sadly. She continued, "So you _are_ real, indeed. How is it that you became the Ghost of the Present, anyway?"

"Well, more than being a ghost or a spirit, I'm actually the general atmosphere or attitude of the times. I've changed a lot through the years, just as society has changed. As to me being real, well, in Reality, I'm simply a legend, though here in Toonity I'm quite real. Still, what you see before you is a far cry from what Nicholas of Bari was."

"Who?" She really hated being thrown off like that.

"Nicholas of Bari," he repeated, petting a reindeer's head. "Or, the original Saint Nick, if you will. Like you, he was quite wealthy, but _unlike_ you, he chose the _right_ father."

"Oh, please, don't start with that," she moaned, rubbing her head. "I had a lot of lip from your partner concerning that."

"But it's true, Dee. Nicholas of Bari chose to be generous, and because of that he became a legend, and here in Toonity he became, well, me. The father _you_ chose isn't going to give you a good eternity, you know. But enough talk," he said, walking back to the sleigh. "We're wasting nightlight. Come on!"

Before Dakota could decide to follow him, the ghost picked her up from her pyjama shirt again and slumped her on the left of the front seat. "HEY!" she protested. She glared up at him, "You know, this is getting reeeeally old—" Her complaints were cut short when she saw what was in front of her.

Instead of a blank plate, the front of the sleigh was a panel filled with switches, buttons, LED's, GPS readouts, satellite weather maps, world time settings, and two long screens that scrolled with hundreds of names, with the labels "NAUGHTY" and "NICE" above them. On the "Naughty" list, the scrolling stopped, and one name began blinking.

The Knight Industries Two Thousand would have had his scanners turn green if it had seen the panel.

"You're reluctant to follow directions, Dee, and you know that." He sat on her right and took hold of the leather reins. "We wouldn't need to do that if you just do as you are told." He noticed that his companion could barely see above the front of the sleigh, so he commanded, "Adjust passenger seat."

"YIKES!" She jumped with a start when she felt her seat rise to give her proper visibility, though she was expecting to be ejected or something.

"Safety restraints!" Two four-point seat belt type harnesses tentacled from behind them and latched in front of their torsos, making Dakota yipe again. Before she could say anything else, the ghost leaned down to her and whispered, "We all love this part." He straightened, whipped the reins lightly, and commanded, "Ahem:

Now, Dasher!

Now, Dancer!

Now, Prancer and Vixen!

On, Comet!

On, Cupid!

On, Donner and Blitzen!" He stopped for a moment to smile at his companion.

"And ON RUDOLPH!

To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall!

Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"

Each reindeer raised his/her head and perked his/her ears as his/her name was called out. When Rudolph's name was called, his nose shone with the intensity of a floodlight, though red, and the balcony doors burst open once again. As Dakota felt the sleigh lurch forward, and her insides quiver with vertigo, all she could say was "WhoooooOOOOOAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" There was a clattering of hooves and a scraping of metal as the sleigh slid forward, but both sounds stopped when the reindeer leapt off the balcony rampart and into the snowy night.

The sleigh was airborne!

The sleigh bells jingled beautifully, as if playing a song no one else knew. The teenager looked down and saw her mansion and estate grow smaller and smaller, and now all she could do was clutch at her harness and say, "This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this isn't happening…"

But despite her mantras, it was happening, and it was happening to _her_. As they left the estate, however, space and time seemed to frown upon the teenager. "What? It's morning already?"

"Evening, actually. Normally I only travel at night, but in cases such as yours, I make an exception." On and on they flew over the snow-covered Acme Acres, and apparently invisibly, since no one seemed to notice an object the size of an 18-wheeler flying several hundred metres above them.

After a while, the sleigh descended on one of the less prosperous parts of town, and not at a mall, but a simple corner grocer. Despite the lack of shopping centres and large business offices, Dakota noticed that the toons were jostling all over the place, not shoving each other, but with a happy sense of urgency. The sleigh landed on the street, without anyone noticing, the two harnesses detached themselves, letting the passengers step off. The ghost then pulled off the huge red bag as well and flung it on his back. Meanwhile, Dakota saw several toons of various species walk out of the grocery store, quite happy, yet not carrying much. Then, a male brown bear and a female cougar walked in, and from the look of them, they were obviously on the lower economic levels.

They stepped inside too, with Dakota looking in shock as a 3.5 metre-tall man, and his huge red bag, easily squeezed himself through the single door. Inside, the lowly toons were paying for their groceries, when the clerk, a young hound, suddenly said, "Oh! Excuse me, but you gave me too much cash. Would you like the rest of the change, or would you like another item?"

This shocked the brunette to no end. Having plenty of experience with money, she had clearly seen the amount of money given, and the total amount to pay. "What's that idiot doing?" she blurted. "Is he giving money to them for FREE?"

"He's giving of himself to others, because he knows it is in his power to do so."

"It's also in his power to NOT lose profit! What a waste?"

"A waste?" asked the ghost. He reached into his bag, and pulled out—not a present—but a handful of gold dust.

"GOLD!" screamed the teenager, lunging for the bag.

(SMASH!)

Despite his size, the ghost easily dodged her tackle and let her smash her face on the wall. As gold sparkles swirled above her and she peeled herself off, he explained, "This is more than gold, Dee. These are eternal riches—the money and gold _you_ know are strictly _temporary_. When someone gives—out of love—to someone who cannot pay back, that goes to their eternal account. They receive interest here AND compound interest when they reach the end of their journey, with returns of 3,000, 6,000, and 10,000 per cent. In many cases, including this one, there are those much richer than you." He proceeded to sprinkle both giver and receiver, watched by the scowling teenager.

They walked out of the store, and as they prepared to leave, she asked, "So, all those corporations with huge charity budgets, they are richer than me as well?"

"Not necessarily. The conditions are to give out of _love_, not _pity_. There are those who give only to make themselves, and their businesses, look good to everyone: they only give to boost their Public Image and Public Relations, that is, they _buy_ their 'generous image and reputation'. But deep within them, they are just as selfish and miserable and proud and ill willed and hateful and envious—and murderous—" she shivered, "—like you. They'd be better off not giving than giving to white-wash their selfishness."

That was quite an oxymoron for Dakota; she wasn't sure she understood. And she wasn't sure she _wanted_ to understand.

The sleigh took off, and they went on their way. After a few minutes of travelling, they stopped in front of a large Tudor-style house. Its upper stories were white with a dark brown trim, and its first story was of red brick. Its arched doors and windows gave it a certain "cottage" feel, but its three stories made it one of the largest houses around. They stepped inside, walked past the living room, entered what appeared to be an elevator, and the ghost pressed the "basement" button. Once there, they stepped out and walked down a long hall. Dakota didn't know where they were or who lived here, but then they walked past a laundry room and stepped into what appeared to be a recording studio. This time, she didn't pay attention to the ghost somehow fitting himself in passages so narrow for him, bag and all, because she recognised the occupants.

"All right, what's the big idea here?" she demanded of him. "Why the (CENSORED) do I need to see my enemies, ESPECIALLY that black panther!" She was also feeling quite self-conscious being clad in only her pyjamas, but then she remembered that they could neither see, hear, smell, nor touch her.

"Just listen. You'll be very surprised."

Indeed, inside the room were Nolan, Bekki, The J, Anni, and A.J., tuning up their instruments. And Dakota was scowling at every one of them. She wasn't the only one who wasn't calm, however.

"All right, what the (CENSORED) are we going to CALL this (CENSORED) band anyway?" asked the orange doe, tuning her bass.

"Well we certainly can't call it the (CENSORED) Band. Unless we only wished to play rough clubs," chuckled her boyfriend, and host, tuning his guitar.

"Sounds like fun," she smirked at him.

Anni stared at her sister from over the drums, "Wow, one whole sentence without a bleep, Bekki! It must be a record for you!"

"Yeah! It looks like Nolan is rubbing off on you, right Bekki!" added Anni's jaguar boyfriend, preparing some sheet music.

The older doe ground her teeth seductively at _her_ boyfriend and winked at him. "(CENSORED) yeah!" Pause, "Hee hee, just not in all the (CENSORED) ways I'd want." That comment made Nolan blush full-body, and A.J. laughed at his cousin's reaction.

Turning on his keyboard, he turned to the band, "We can't call ourselves the Bloomin' Loonies, either. Our parents took that name already. We need something to identify _our_ generation."

"Well, how about the Loonin' Bloomies?" suggested the jaguar.

The cat-rat host shook his head, "Nah, it still sounds too much like Dad's band, _and_ it's also vaguely naughty."

"Naughty?" questioned the Mexican-American, his tail curling in curiosity.

"Um, yeah. 'Bloomies' could be translated as 'bloomers', don't you know?"

"I still don't get it."

The fox-rabbit explained, "Well 'bloomers' were a type of ladies underwear that took the place of petticoats, back in the day. _And_ it's used as an alternate term for lingerie, so—"

"All right! All right!" The carnivore's fur turned slightly purple as he blushed, raising his paws to halt the explanation. The others laughed at how easily he was embarrassed, but stopped laughing when someone else entered.

It was a familiar green buck, his ears low behind him while he dragged his foot-paws and ground his teeth VERY loudly, so loud that the others thought he was going to break off an incisor. Nolan blinked in surprise, startled at his friend's condition. "Tex, m'lad, what happened to you?" he asked, padding to him. "You look like the carrot crop's been cancelled and all the eggs have been spoilt." Bekki turned to him, nearly saying "sheesh" at a typical reaction of a son of a rat raised by rabbits _and_ a vegetarian cat who loved egg salad.

Her brother replied quietly, "It's—it's over."

"Over?" asked the feline-rodent.

"Oi'm clueless, here," added his cousin.

Bekki then took a wild guess, "You finally broke it off with that little (CENSORED)?"

A very weak "Yes" was all her brother could say, barely looking up at her.

"(CENSORED), I had the feeling something suddenly (CENSORED) stopped today—so you—you finally let Dakota go?"

A.J. turned to his cousin, "From what Oi've heard, that would have to be pretty monumental. She had to have stooped pretty low for him to do it."

"Oi'll say. Even after that time travel debacle, he still stuck by her. Now, though," he turned to the heartbroken buck, "Tex, m'lad, what did she do?"

He shuddered for a moment, ground his teeth in grief, and explained. "You all know the story of 'A Christmas Carol', right?"

"Of course," replied the felid-murid. "Bit of a tradition for Mum and Dad to read it to us at Christmas time. Sometimes Aunt Miranda and Uncle Leo get into the act and do parts."

"Oi hear Talleen's doing Tiny Tim this year," added the canid-leporid.

The older rabbit looked blankly at all of them, then he resumed his teeth grinding. "Well—with what Dee did today—she—she made Scrooge look like Mother Teresa."

The band stood still at that, while Dakota just crossed her arms. "And it took years to perfect that," she commented, heard only by herself and the ghost.

"Oi take it this is the _before-visitation_ Scrooge, and not the after—man, how greedy can she get?" asked A.J.

"Or cold, for that matter," added his cousin.

The green buck continued, now with bloodshot eyes, "It wasn't just greed: it was her hatred for us all, and most of all to you, J." The carnivore's tail stiffened at that. "She shut herself off from her uncle as well, despite his good nature." There was also the issue of the donation, but Tex didn't dare mention that in front of Nolan and A.J. "And—and—she called Christmas something that would even make Bekki blush."

"Now THAT is a FEAT," quipped Nolan.

"HEY!"

The canine-lagomorph padded up, "From the sound of it, you're better off without her, Tex. She'll hoist her own petard, eventually."

"Aye, bad ones like her always come to a bad end. You're well away, old sport."

Tex looked at the two hybrid cousins and replied, voice cracking, "But that's not what I wanted! I wanted her to see the Light! I wanted her to be set free! I don't want her to end up in anything terrible!" He broke down in sobs now, and fell on the floor, "I—just—wanted her—to turn to the Light—because I—love—her—so much——————" His body shook with every sob, his head under his arms in inexplicable grief.

The brunette just watched in shock as the buck crumbled in front of her.

"Tex is the only toon on this planet who loves you like that, Dakota, despite what you are, how much money you have, and who your father is," boomed the apparition.

She was about to reply to that when the youngest doe stomped toward her brother, ears stiff behind her, and grunted, "You pathetic WIMP! I TOLD you that loving Dakota would only bring you to THIS! Look at all it took to FINALLY make you let go!"

Her boyfriend pulled her back and added, though slightly more softly, "Anni's right, Tex. It only took one request to do fraud to make _me_ let go of her. You were just harming yourself! You didn't have to go through all of this in order to let her go!"

"It wasn't her curse that made me let go," sniffed the downed buck.

"Huh?" asked his blue sister.

"I—I finally confronted her with all she had done. I gave her the chance to make amends and turn to the Light. I—gave her my ultimatum."

"And she (CENSORED) it, I take it?"

Dakota chuckled at Bekki's method of describing her actions.

He looked up. "Y-yes. When I left her estate, I received a Word that she was no longer my responsibility."

Double take. "His WHAT?" blurted the humanmaid to the ghost.

He explained, "In other words, you severed your only lifeline, Dee. That's another reason why you needed this experience."

Tex's head fell again. "But—it's—just—so—hard—to let go—!" His muffled cries filled the room for a moment.

The elder hybrid kneeled and gently gripped his friend's shoulder, "The phrase is: 'where there's life there's hope.' Other than that, Oi don't really know what to say. The sad thing is that—well—love hurts sometimes. She _may_ see the error of her ways, and she may not. Only time will tell, Oi suppose. If she chooses the Light, she'll come to you, Tex."

"This from somebody in love with someone ten years his senior."

"Hey, Oi can be sensitive!" he protested, turning to his cousin. "Anyway, Roberta _did_ let me down easy. Oi suppose—Tex probably tried to do the same for Dakota—and she wouldn't allow it. Very possessive, that one, or so Oi've heard." There were more muffled sobs from the buck after that. The rest didn't know what else to do or say, so they just sat next to him, holding his paws, a paw on a shoulder on his back or head, just letting him know that they were there for him.

After a while, Tex sat up, spent. The carnivore-rodent then had an idea, "Well, hopefully now, Tex can stand to hear this as-yet unnamed band rehearse a bit more before Bekki and Anni help him home, ay wot? Moight take his mind off troubles for a wee bit. Won't help, long term, Oi know, but for right now—?"

The green lagomorph looked at his friends again and sighed, "I—I guess I could use whatever help you can give. Go ahead, guys. I'm listening." He turned to the band as A.J. padded to the keyboard, and began playing the piano introduction to Rufus Wainwright's version of "Hallelujah". Then, he stopped and asked, "Oi don't suppose you'd want to sing, would you? Maybe vent a little?"

"I—I guess. I feel so empty now, maybe this will help," replied Tex as he stood.

"Try this."

As Tex examined the sheet music The J handed to him, Dakota just chuckled, "Heh. Typical male reaction to vent feelings, especially for someone with ART for a hobby: Either break out into a song or write a poem. As IF I would ever fall for someone like Tex!"

The ghost, on his part, just looked sadly at her, and then sprinkled gold dust all over the band members, but even more on the black feline and the green lagomorph.

Tex took the music, read a bit, and nodded to the carnivore-lagomorph, cueing him to begin. When the introduction finished, he began:

_"I've heard there was a secret chord _

_That David played, and it pleased the Lord."_ Dakota paled.

_"But you don't really care for music, do you?"_ Was he looking at HER?

_"It goes like this:_

_The fourth, the fifth,_

_The minor fall, the major lift._

_The baffled king composing 'Hallelujah'."_ The ghost grinned in silent agreement.

_"Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Halleluuuuuuuujaaah."_ For some reason, that word made Dakota's insides cringe.

_"Your faith was strong but you needed proof._

_You saw her bathing on the roof."_ Though he never peeked on Dakota, actually.

_"Her beauty in the moonlight overthrew you."_ Moonlight? Did Tex think she was beautiful?

_"She tied you to a kitchen chair,_

_She broke your throne! She cut your hair!_

_And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah—"_ Tex was crying again, the metaphors clearly portraying what he felt Dakota had done to him.

_"Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Halleluuuuuuuujaaah."_

_"Maybe I have been here before._

_I know this room; I've walked this floor._

_I used to live alone before I knew you."_ Despite living in a large warren.

_"I've seen your flag on the marble arch._

_Love is not a victory march!_

_It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah!"_ For some reason, it seemed as if Tex was singing directly to her, not just himself.

_"Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Halleluuuuuuuujaaah."_

_"There was a time you'd let me know_

_What's real and going on below._

_But now you never show it to me, do you?"_ True. She trusted him with her evil plans, but those times were gone now.

_"And remember when I moved (with) you?_

_The holy dark was moving too!_

_And every breath we drew was Hallelujah!"_ He _wanted_ to be with her, despite her evil, he _needed_ her.

_"Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Halleluuuuuuuujaaah."_ And perhaps, Dakota was beginning to see what he _really_ felt for her.

_"(I know) there's a God above,_

_And all I ever learned from love_

_Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you."_ Tex glared at J now, making him lower his ears.

_"And it's not a cry you can hear at night,_

_It's not somebody who's seen the Light!_

_It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah!"_ The cry of someone lost, perchance, forever.

_"Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Halleluuuuuuuujaaah."_

There was no clapping, no cheering, just a lonely buck weeping for a lost soul. The ghost took hold of Dakota and said, "Come. Let's find a livelier place." They left the basement and flew away, not without the ghost first sprinkling the whole house with gold. As they flew off, he commented, "You know, this bag should not be full. I should be able to empty it every single Christmas."

"And why don't you? I could put the gold to good use," she grinned greedily.

"I only give to those who give out of love. Many places have not seen so much as a speck of this gold in centuries. In fact, your mansion has not received one grain since it was built!" She looked at him defensively, but he added, "That can be changed, but it is not in _my_ power to change it. It's a decision _you_ or your father must make." The teenager didn't reply to that, so she just crossed her arms and huffed to herself. And when they landed, she huffed even more.

"Oh, no, not Uncle Duncan's house!"

"Oh yes. Come, there are things you must see and hear!" They stepped off the sleigh and entered a large two-story cream-coloured house. There were Christmas Carols playing in the stereo, but low enough to avoid being annoying. Inside, Dakota saw that the living room was filled with relatives she had not seen since she returned from England, all clad in cozy sweaters and colourful slacks. There was her Uncle Duncan and his Asian wife, and his young son and two younger daughters, all with black hair; her Aunt Amanda (her purple hair long gone and replaced with the original red) and her balding Caucasian husband, their two tall teenage sons and three tall teenage daughters, all with red hair; her youngest uncle—with a complete set of red hair—and his brunette fiancée; her grandparents, Mac and Emily, and even her mother was there!

"What's Mom doing here?"

"Her brother invited her, remember? Naturally, he invited your dad as well, but he had work to do, as you."

The teenager said nothing, but kept looking at the family. They were all in the living room sitting on the couch, chairs, and floor, looking at one of Duncan's daughters, who was standing next to a large whiteboard on a tripod. Behind her was a tall Christmas tree, filled with ornaments and apparently _planted_ on presents.

Dakota's cousin read a small card, pressed a button on a stopwatch, and began drawing.

"Tree!"

"Smoke!"

"Cloud!"

"Monster!"

"Blob!"

"The Creature From The Black Lagoon!"

"A red tide!"

"Godzilla?"

On and on they guessed, until a buzz from the stopwatch stopped them, and finally the "artist" declared, "No! It's Cousin Dee!"

That response brought laughs from everyone, including Elmyra, but a snarl and clenched fists from Dakota, "WHAT?"

No one could hear her, of course, but much to her surprise, Duncan stepped up in her defence. "Now stop that! Christmas isn't a time for being mean!"

One of Amanda's sons replied, "Aw, come on, Uncle Duncan. You know Dee doesn't care to know what happens here or what we say about her!"

"Maybe, but she's _still_ your cousin. You should be concerned that she _doesn't_ want any part of this, or any of us. That only shows that there is something definitely wrong that needs correcting."

Dakota told the ghost, "Oh, please. As IF I'd want any part of this. I'm sure that the moment I step into this house every single one of them will be asking me for money!"

The "artist" sat down, "Yeah, right. She thinks that the moment she steps into this house every single one of us will be asking her for money."

Dakota did a double take at her cousin.

"Yeah," added Amanda's youngest daughter. "It's not as if we're homeless that we'd all be _begging_ her for money."

The "artist's" sister added, "Well, if she were here, I wouldn't ask her for a dime. And I _know_ she wouldn't give it if I _did_ ask!"

Duncan's son turned to his father and asked, "Dad, why doesn't Cousin Dee like us? Was it something we did, or does she just not want to have fun?"

The cousin in question was about to reply with something unspeakably rude, but was interrupted by her own mother. "Well, my best guess is that she just takes after her father. I was hoping that she wouldn't be _every single way_ like him, but that's the choice she made."

"(CENSORED)!" blurted the observer. "Even my own mother's against me!"

"Against?" questioned the ghost. "I'd say more like 'concerned', Dee. Concerned about you—because you're _family_."

Meanwhile, Duncan sighed and turned to his sister, "Well, that's a very sad choice she made. She's just cheating herself out of good family fun. And, since I suppose she's not coming tonight, I think it's safe—and sad—for me to assume that she has missed good family fun for another year, AND, she has cheated herself out of another present."

"Present?" asked Dakota. She watched as her uncle stood and walked to the Christmas tree. He picked up a red-wrapped present, and took it to a closet. When he opened it, Dakota leaned a bit closer and saw that the closet was full of presents of many sizes.

She heard another cousin ask, "Dad, why don't you just _send_ the presents to her?"

"Because," he replied, shutting the closet and locking it, "she _knows_ her presents are here. All she has to do to receive them is come here and ask for them. When she does, I'll be more than happy to give her all the stuff she's missed over the years."

The greedy teenager could not believe her ears. The ghost stood behind her, "You have caused much unnecessary grief in these times of joy, Dee."

Something swelled up within her that caused her to grunt, "Maybe they wouldn't HAVE grief if they'd stop asking me to come here! And I don't NEED their pity OR their pathetic gifts!" Her whole body stiffened with anger.

The ghost walked past her, "I wasn't just talking about _them_, Dee." He proceeded to give generous sprinklings of gold all over the remaining presents, on the family members, and the dinner that was on the table. Glancing sadly at his charge, he also threw a few sprinkles at the closet. Dakota was about to ask him just how the sprinkles managed to float through the door, but the ghost was already on his way out, so she reluctantly followed.

The next trip took them outside the city and into Acme Forest. When the sleigh landed, an incredible repulsion nearly made Dakota lurch her dinner. "RABBITS!" she yelped, looking at the tree stump with a mailbox beside it.

"Oh, yes, Dee. Rabbits, and plenty of them."

Grumbling, she stepped off the sleigh and followed the ghost down the hole. Inside, there were rabbits of every size and colour combination known to toonkind, and so many that she didn't bother counting. "Ack! Is the entire rabbit population here?"

"They're all family, one way or another."

This she verified when she saw none other than her school principal: Bugs Bunny. Next to him was his wife, Honey Bunny. She saw Buster and Babs, and their children, The Fourteen, scattered about. There were other adult rabbits around, apparently part of Babs' original warren, and their kits as well. They were having fun talking and jumping around, some were sitting in front of Bugs to hear crazy tales, and some were adding their own decorations to the Christmas tree. Carefully, the ghost manoeuvred around the lagomorphs, and walked down a long hall, followed by Dakota. Both came to a door, and stepped inside, finding one buck lying face down on his bed, ears to his sides, and all alone.

"Tex?" asked the humanmaid.

He didn't hear her, of course, but she did hear what he was saying, despite it being muffled, and filled with light sobs and very loud tooth grinding: "Oh dear God—I know that I've done what You said and I let Dee go—but—it's just so painful—especially at this time of the year—" Dakota was shocked once more. "—she has made her choice and moved on—but—I only ask—that You'd have mercy on her—You know where she came from—how she was raised—and who her parents are—oh God—if it's possible—don't take into account—all she's done against us—and J—"

(CLANG!)

The brunette's jaw hit the ground one more time.

"—and please—just take away all the love I still have for her—all of this is just—just——consuming me—"

"Looks like he's taking the order of 'love your enemies' to its fullest dimension, don't you think?" asked the giant behind the humanmaid.

Before she could put her jaw back in place and reply, a swift kick suddenly burst open the door, causing Dakota to jump and nearly hit her head on the roof. "Are you still here bawling for that would-be-murderer!" grunted Anni, stomping over to the bed, ears stiff behind her again. "Get over it already!"

Her brother didn't bother to look up. "You don't know how I feel right now, Barbara!" The doe grunted and stomped in place. "J would NEVER turn evil, reject you, or try to kill ANYONE! Your heart wouldn't be broken like this!"

She just flipped him over, grabbed him by his shirt, pulled him close, and grunted, "Well, yours is, bro, and I honestly doubt that it's my fault that you're paying the consequences despite ALL THE WARNINGS I gave you!" She pulled her left fist back, "Maybe I should just give a good POUND—"

"BARBARA ANNE."

Sheepishly, the young doe released her brother, patted down his shirt, and turned to face her mother at the door, giving her an award-winning grin. "Barbara Anne, what have I told you about fighting your brothers?"

"(Sigh) No fighting outside the ring."

As this exchange was happening, Dakota saw Buster enter and pad to the bed, where he sat next to his son. "Tex?"

"(sniff) Hi, dad."

The blue buck put his arm around his offspring, "Tex, I know that what happened with Dakota is horribly devastating for you, and you're sort of—well—mourning for her now, but _please_ understand that it's Christmas right now, and all your family is here. Do you think that maybe you can hold the tears, just for tonight, and have some fun? And if you need to, tomorrow your mother and I will cry with you."

"I—I don't know—"

Babs padded up, "Please, son. Nolan, A.J. and The J are here—"

"J IS HERE!" squealed the doe, (WARP!) warping out of the room in that instant.

Everyone looked at the door for a moment, then Babs continued, "—and they want to have fun with you and all your brothers and sisters. Could you do this little sacrifice for them, perhaps, as your Christmas present for them?"

The young buck looked at his parents and sighed, "O—okay. I'll try to raise my ears, too." He stood and slowly padded out, his ears undecided as to whether stay up or down. When they left, Dakota and the ghost followed.

Back in the living room, the humanmaid looked up and saw the two hybrid cousins and the black panther standing near the entry ladder in their winter gear, with Anni standing _very_ close to her boyfriend. And despite all the noise, she clearly heard A.J. singing, "…his party, and he'll cry if he wants to, cry if he wants—" His interpretation was cut short by The J giving him a _very_ carnivorous glare. "Sorry," he said subdued.

The onça cub then turned to his girlfriend, "Thanks for the invite, Anni! But I can't stay long. My uncles and aunts are warping over from Mexico and my dad will be bringing them to the lair in a bit."

"Hey, no problem! You can stay here for a bit, and then I can go over to your lair and see all your relatives again!"

"Sounds to me like you're just going to challenge Cousin E.M.M.Y. to the bazillionth game of chess!"

"Hey, it just MIGHT be the one where I finally beat her! Besides, I _would_ like to see more toons today than just several hundred bunnies."

The brunette saw this exchange with disgust. "Ugh, more furry toons. As if this place didn't have enough with all these rabbits!" The ghost seemed to ignore her, as he stepped near the entrance.

Meanwhile, A.J.'s face twisted into a grimace as a grey, brown, and purple does approached: Alexi, June, and Hunni; their eyes glinting with romance. He turned to Bekki and gave her _his_ most carnivorous Stare of Doom as he could muster. "Thanks for inviting me to your party, _Bekki_," he growled. The three does were approaching fast, when suddenly a white LED lit above him, and he barked, "Hey, kids! Let's go outside and make an ARMY of snowmen!"

"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" What followed Dakota could only describe as a multi-coloured rabbit stampede. As the lagomorphs exited, the ghost held up his bag so that gold dust fell on every single rabbit. When the dust cleared, a thoroughly flattened A.J. lay near the hole of the Bunny Burrow.

Smugly, the humanmaid walked over to the flattened rabbit-fox and boasted, "Looks like _I'm_ not the only one whose plans backfire, FREAK."

The ghost, meanwhile, went on to put gold dust on the adult rabbits that remained, on the Christmas tree and the presents under it, and on the banquet table. While the jaguar and rat-cat helped their friend return to his normal shape, the spirit said, "Tex has suffered greatly because of you, but he still has family and friends to help him with his sufferings. He _will_ enjoy this party, thanks to everyone here. Unfortunately, he isn't the only one who's suffering because of you, if not directly, then _indirectly_."

"What do you mean 'indirectly'?"

At this point, a cell phone rang. The carnivore-lagomorph had just popped back into his original shape when he realised whose phone it was. "Hello?" Dakota thought she could hear the caller, but she couldn't distinguish what was being said. "Aye, dad, Oi'm here at the Bunny's—huh? Oh—wait, is she all right?" His friends stood still as the atmosphere turned uncharacteristically serious. "Oh—um, no, dad—! Oi'll be there too. Same hospital, roight—?——Okay—okay—yeah, Oi'll be right there—right—okay, dad. Oi love you. See you in a bit." A.J. hung up, and his cousin was about to ask him what was happening, but the rabbit-fox beat him to it. "Something happened to Aunt Miranda in the hospital. Uncle Leo and the rest of the family are getting _very_ worried now." A.J. re-did his red winter jacket and scarf, "Dad called to let us know they'll spend the night with her again, but Oi think it's best if we were there as well, maybe not for the night, but—"

"Well, then, what are we waiting for? Let's get out of here!" Nolan had picked up enough of the urgency of the matter to forget the present party and express concern about his relatives, and climbed up the ladder.

"Do you guys need anything?" asked J, also quite worried now.

Both cousins looked at him, and then A.J. looked at him in the eye. "Prayer, my friend. Lots and LOTS of prayer," and he too scrambled up the ladder.

As the teenagers left the burrow, the ghost told Dakota. "You'll be surprised just how far-reaching your actions can be, Dee." She, naturally, said nothing, as if a freak family she had no relations with could in some way be affected by her actions. They, too, left the burrow and flew off, this time leaving the forest and going back into the city. The humanmaid had a slight hunch of where their next stop would be, and her suspicions were confirmed when she saw the huge building in front of her.

Acme Acres General Medical Centre

They landed on the roof, near the rampart so as not to obstruct the heliport, and took an elevator to the maternity ward. They walked several hallways, again, ignored by the patients and staff, and entered a room. Inside, sitting up on the bed, was a brown mink with brown headfur, wearing a hospital gown, looking _very_ worried, and occasionally wincing in pain. Sitting on her left, next to the glucose bag, was her husband, a tall brown rabbit with blonde headfur, wearing a green and red sweater with black pants. After her experience in the burrow, naturally, Dakota noticed something was amiss. "Hah! Some family! Where are THEIR relatives to help them now?" she scoffed, hands on her hips.

"In the waiting room, of course," whispered the ghost, making her wince with defeat.

The mink held the rabbit's paw, "Leo—why is the doctor taking so long?"

"Shhhhh, my darlin'." More British accents. "The doc is probably just checking his golf scorecard. There's nothing to worry about!"

"Th-then why are your ears down?"

The teenager chuckled. "Heh, some support HE'S being! She should have stuck to her own species!"

Here, a tall meerkat in a white lab coat entered the room. The couple looked at him expectantly, so he held up his clipboard and began, "Well, Mrs. Carrotte, I got the results here, and they don't look very promising." The couple's spirits sank. "I was expecting _some_ complications due to your species difference, but I didn't expect them so soon."

"B-but what about the baby?" blurted the mink lady. "Is the baby all right?"

The meerkat sighed. "No. But I wouldn't worry _that_ much. The cat-scans revealed that she's a fighter, and a stubborn one at that. She wants to live, so I'm sure she will. Now, we managed to stabilise your condition, but we'll have to keep you under observation to make sure that you and the baby remain stable, and are able to reach at _least_ your seventh month. However, you _might_ want to be prepared in case we need to speed things up and schedule a Cæsarean."

"CÆSAREAN?" chorused the parents.

Dakota just shook her head at how irrelevant this all seemed to her.

"It's a standard procedure," he replied with professional detachment. "However, there is _another_ procedure that can be done in your case that won't require something so traumatic. I'll go back to my office and get all the data you need—but I _do_ have to warn you that it's barely in its initial research. Then again, chances are that you just might fit the profile needed to carry it through. If you are, then I'll say that my prognosis for a full recovery are—quite high."

The doctor went to retrieve the information, while Lionel shot his ears up and beamed, "See? Everything is working out! There's no need to worry! And even if we _can't_ try something new, Cæsareans aren't that big a deal!"

Miranda couldn't calm down, for some reason. "Oh—oh Leo!" she sobbed. "I just wanted everything to be perfect for us and the baby! I just wanted to go through a normal pregnancy! Why———_why_ is this happening?"

Her husband was speechless for a moment, but then he brushed back some of his wife's headfur from her face, "Luv, maybe—maybe there are couples worse off than we are—and—and maybe if we go through with this, the research will be completed, and they will be able to see their babies grow healthy, like _ours_ will. And you heard the doc: our baby is a fighter! Took after _both_ of our families, ey wot!" He kissed her forehead.

She huffed with exhaustion, and suddenly opened her eyes wide and put a paw on her abdomen. "Whoa!" she looked at the bulge under the sheets and said, "Aw, baby. I'm so sorry that you're having your first fight so early in life. But you have to be strong, baby!" she sniffed. "Mommy will be strong, and Daddy will be strong! And come next spring, you'll see what a beautiful world we have here in Acme Acres!"

"Pathetic mink," gagged the humanmaid, arms crossed. "NOTHING is worth that much trouble, OR a hospital expense, geez! If they knew what was good for them, they'd just end this whole ordeal right now!"

The ghost boomed, "If everyone thought like that, Dee, then YOU wouldn't be here causing trouble!" The teenager did a double take at him. "Your mother had a pregnancy MUCH worse than Miranda's. Despite your father's objections, she carried you to FULL TERM. And she didn't do it because she was an idiot. She was in pain for _ten_ months, Dee, and at any moment of her choosing she could have ended it _all_."

The Daughter said nothing at that piece of information so suddenly revealed. She just slowly turned, and looked at the pained couple in front of her. After a while, she asked, "So, the baby dies, then?"

"'If these shadows remain unchanged'," he proclaimed solemnly, "I see a new nursery, new baby furniture, new baby clothes, and new baby toys, all new—" Dakota sighed in relief, "—and unused, carefully preserved, yet gathering dust. If these shadows remain unaltered in the Future, the baby will die." Dakota gasped slightly. "But," added the ghost, business-like, "Perhaps you're right. 'Why don't they let evolution take its course and eliminate that freak before it's born, geez'!" She whirled at him, as if she had just been slapped in the face. Then, with a sternness never seen on someone so jovial, he leaned down to her face and scolded, "Child! _'If a child you be in heart, not adamant, forbear that wicked cant until you have discovered who the Freaks are, **what** they are, and **where** they are. Will YOU decide what toons shall live, and what toons shall die? It may be that in the sight of Heaven, you are more **worthless** and **less fit to live** than millions like this couple's baby! Oh God! To hear the insect on the leaf pronouncing on the too much life among his hungry brothers in the dust!'_"

Something tore at Dakota, something she had never felt before.

Remorse.

Conviction.

Pain.

Pity.

Repentance?

NO! She fought it with all her logic, and shot back with furious fists, "NO! I never told them to marry! I didn't marry them! I never told them to get pregnant! THEY knew they were a mixed couple! THEY knew the risks! THEY made the decision! They're not my employees! Why should **_I_** be held responsible for that freak's life!" She stood back and hollered at the ceiling, "I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM! I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THAT FREAK! I DISALLOW ANY RESPONSIBILITY FOR WHAT MAY HAPPEN TO THEM! _THEY_ ARE RESPONSIBLE, NOT ME!" She stomped toward him and pointed to his face, "Don't you try to pull a Bob Cratchit on ME!"

"Rest for a bit, luv. Oi'll go outside and tell the rest of the gang about this. We'll need all the prayer we can get!" Lionel stood and left.

The ghost leaned down to her. "You aren't worthy to have an employee like Bob Cratchit! If he HAD worked for you, he would have frozen to death before his first Christmas with you! You weren't worthy to have TEX as an employee, either! And you know perfectly well _why_ you're responsible, Dee, and why you _will_ be held responsible. You did a lot of medical research to prepare yourself for your time trips, AND to prepare the way for the children you hoped to have with The J. If you submit your research to this hospital, you _will_ save the baby's life." She whirled away from him, arms crossed. Tenderness returned to the ghost, and he spoke softly to her, "Dee, you have the power to save not only this life, but millions of others, and not just furries, but humans as well. All the credit would go to _you_, not the doctors, nor the hospital. So, will you change the shadows of the future, so that others of my race may find the baby here?" She still said nothing. "Or must everyone who isn't productive die? Will you continue to do the works of your father, and prove that you are indeed Jacob Marley's Daughter?"

She whirled and pointed to his face. "DON'T—YOU—CALL—ME—THAT—AGAIN!"

"You are just proving to everyone who you _really_ are, and whose path you walk. Now, come! You may think that you have a huge net worth, but you must now see just how much you have devalued your own life—and to a DANGEROUSLY low point, I might add!" With that, he held her by her pyjama shirt, and stopped for a moment to sprinkle gold on Miranda and her baby. Then he dragged her outside, despite her protests, and took her to the waiting room, where he proceeded to sprinkle gold on Lionel, Nigel, RuBarb, Lizbeth, Adam, Lillian, Rupert, Lola, Viktor, Amanda, A.J., Nolan, Talleen, and all of Miranda's and Lionel's relatives. He then dragged her back to the roof, despite her protests again, threw her up on the sleigh, and took off again.

This time, they left the city, and flew south at an incredible speed. As they were flying, the ghost pressed a few buttons on the console, and a narrow piece of paper emerged from the bottom of one screen. "If you think you can escape being held responsible for the baby, then you should read another segment of The Book that you missed."

He gave her the tiny printout, which she snatched and read:

"Whoever knows how to do good, and doesn't do it, to him it is wrongdoing—"

Again, Dakota threw away the note as if it was fire, and with all the wind that was blowing, it was immediately lost. For a while, she said nothing, perhaps trying to convince herself that her research couldn't possibly have anything that could save anyone's life, much less a rabbit-mink hybrid. Some time later, she saw that they were still travelling south. "So where are we going now?"

"We're going to see how your actions nearly ended your _own_ life, Dee."

Confusion crept on her once again, "Ended?" she turned to him. "Was the time machine about to explode or something?"

The ghost whipped the reins, giving the sleigh another kick of speed. "Oh, no. The time machine worked fine every time. We're going to see something else." Dakota did a double take when they appeared to be flying over a huge body of water. "Now, I _am_ the ghost of Christmas Present, but in your particular case, I will need to make an exception and travel to a point in time in the Past."

"The Past? Why?"

"Because of all the time travelling you did, Dee. I'm sure you remember a particular January morning you decided to visit?"

Fear slowly crept on the humanmaid again, as she remembered her actions, in fact, her _last_ time trip. "Uh—Santa—n—nothing happened to me in that last trip—unless those stupid rabbits _did_ almost mess everything up and we were _all_ nearly sent to oblivion?"

They were flying over land again, zooming over tall mountains. "No. Your position in the time machine guaranteed your own safety, even though Calamity's transporter caused you to be sidetracked. Nolan, Anni, and Tex put _themselves_ in danger trying to stop you. And yes, they _did_ nearly get blown to oblivion, but that is not the place where you were nearly cut off, Dee."

On and on they flew, now over a plateau, and a heavily populated area. They slowed down, and landed on a particular street in a particular neighbourhood. Familiarity hit the brunette like a train. "Wh—huh?" she blurted, looking everywhere, and recognising everything, and everyone. "This is The J.A.M.'s old neighbourhood! What are we doing here? I was never in any danger here!"

"That is what you think, Child."

The scene played out in front of them, and Dakota identified herself hiding behind the hedge, while The J.A.M. was on his brother's tricycle, and The R.I.C.K. was standing behind him, both of their backs toward the Caucasian behind the hedge.

"Mewr growl gr gr yowl hiss growl!" repeated the firstborn.

"Yowl-yowl growl-growl _yowl yowl_!" mocked the thirdborn. Enraged, the elder cub's fur turned red, just as the younger cub wheeled the tricycle around and began pedalling away.

The R.I.C.K. scanned the ground for a moment and snatched the first weapon he saw.

Both Dakota Dees leaned closer.

(WHACK!)

It was here that the Dakota on the sleigh noticed something was amiss. The "fishing hook" didn't pierce the cub's left eye, but instead, just made a gash near the corner. Naturally, that didn't stop him from giving a gut-wrenching yowl, making his older brother stand back in shock and turn pale with fright.

The dripping branch fell from his paw.

(UNWARPUNWARP!)

Seconds later, two adult jaguars clad in brown bathrobes, and one with long headfur and apparently pregnant, suddenly appeared outside the house.

"GASP!"

Now it was the mother's turn to pale and flatten her ears when she saw the damage. She quickly exchanged Feline words with the father and then (WARP!) commanded The R.I.C.K. something. The cub hastily ran to the orange car, opened the passenger door, and held it open while the mother carefully picked up the injured one. The father was no longer there, but then he suddenly re-emerged from the front door holding two younger cubs, one male and one female, while a slightly older female cub padded out by herself. He then locked the door and stuffed the cubs into the car, and sped off.

The Dakota at the hedge watched with scrutiny the entire scene, and emerged from her spot with her hands on her hips, and with the most gruesomely smug expression on her face.

_Smiling._

And with her job well done, she turned and walked away.

The pyjama-clad Dakota turned to the apparition, "I don't see any danger to me here. Just what was supposed to happen here? Was the jaguar family supposed to find me and eat me or something?"

"No, but if you look at the other side of the street, you'll see what I'm talking about."

She did so, and gasped when she saw Professor Mary Melody hiding behind a car.

_And pull out a pistol._

As Mary followed the brunette, hiding behind cars and poles again, the ghost explained, "Mary tried to throw you off the time machine, but since she jumped with you at the last moment, she ended up in the alternate timeline you created, where The J.A.M. had lost his eye. She found him, and all her friends, and got Calamity to build _another_ time machine to send her here to stop you. She switched branches on you, Dee, and nearly stopped you once and for all."

Dakota could only watch mutely as she saw Professor Melody—no, (CENSORED) it! Just _plain Mary Melody_ follow her counterpart, who walked with total calmness back to the small park in front of the school. The reindeer pulled the sleigh slowly as they, too, followed the females.

_It was **her**..._ she thought.

The Questor knelt behind a rampart and drew a bead on the toon's head, as she walked into the park.

Her hands weren't trembling.

"All of Heaven was watching, and all of Heaven was demanding that your soul be forfeited right here," said the ghost. "In fact, all of Heaven was rooting for Mary, pleading for her to pull the trigger."

Dakota looked at Mary and at herself, and saw that for nearly one minute, the African-American had a clear shot of her counterpart's head. "But—but—why _didn't_ she?" she asked him.

"I'll let you listen, and you'll know."

Suddenly, the Caucasian thought she heard the African-American speaking, but her lips weren't moving. She then realised she was listening to her thoughts:

_Who knows what more evil this corrupted girl could do to other children in the future?_ Dakota saw her hesitate, but the thoughts resumed:

_No, this is for justice. I will destroy evil, remove whatever device the evil toon has to control the time machine, and scene-change myself to Acme Acres._

_This look-alike will __not harm my boyfriend again._

But then, another Voice boomed out of nowhere. The brunette couldn't identify the source, as there was no one else around.

_**Don't do it.**_

_Huh?_ Dakota saw confusion on Mary's face, but she didn't lower her gun or lose sight of her counterpart.

_No, I **have** to do it! Isn't this what lovers do to defend each other? Destroy the sources of attack? Destroy the attackers? Destroy the enemy? Destroy—_

_**Don't do it.**_

_But—but—true, I'm **not** a villain, and true, this was also something that **villains** do, but didn't good guys **also** have situations like this? Like in a war—?_

_**Are you in a war?**_

_That's a good question. Am I in an open conflagration against someone who is bent on destroying everything I know is good? Does that justify my own intentions?_

_**Don't do it.**_

_Yes. I have to destroy evil. This evil teenager will go unpunished if I do nothing, and worse, she will very likely continue hurting others: other cubs._

Once again, the Carrotte baby stood out in Dakota's memory.

**_Don't do it._**

She saw Mary reaffirm her stance and grip the pistol tighter.

**_Don't do it._**

_But if I kill her now, will the brunette be dead in the other timeline as well, or just here? And if no one knows about this except me, will this action be effective in deterring others from doing something like this?_

**_Don't do it._**

_Or, am I doing this out of hate for the female toon?_

**_Don't do it._**

_Hate is what drives villains forward. I'm not allowed to hate a villain, just the evil within the villain. Can I destroy evil without harming the villain, so that the villain will no longer be one?_

**_Don't do it._**

_Have **I** talked to the evil toon, as deeply as I did with the evil jaguar?_

"Evil jaguar?" asked Dakota. "Did my plan work _that_ well?"

**_Don't do it._**

_Have I found out what drives this villain forward, and what had caused her to turn to the Dark Side, just as I found out with the evil jaguar?_

**_Someone waits for her._**

"WHAT?"

_And could someone love the villain despite her being evil, as much as I loved the Anathema?_

The teenager on the sleigh froze. Someone told Mary not to kill her, not for _Dakota's_ sake, but for TEX'S!

**_Learn._**

_Do I want to be a Terminator, like that wolf?_

**_I have judgment ready for her. I will do this. I will avenge. The J.A.M. is safe. It's time to go._**

Quietly sobbing, she lowered her gun, just as the brunette pulled out a remote. Mary hung her head and put her gun away, (WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPP!) not noticing the blue flash. She remained in the edge of the park for a few minutes, just crying to herself, and thanking God that today was Saturday and no toons were crowding the school.

"So as you can see, The Boss had different plans."

Dakota turned to the ghost, shocked like never before. After a few moments, she tried to speak, "She—she could—she could have _killed_ me—"

"And she didn't. She had already stopped your plan, without you knowing it. And if she _had_ killed you, no one would have known that it was her. There would be no way that Ballistics would have been able to trace the bullet back to its owner because the pistol model hasn't been designed yet. Mary could have taken your identification and all your equipment before leaving, scene-changed herself back to Acme Acres, and return to her original timeline, and you would have died here as a complete unknown. You would have been buried in a common grave in a foreign country twenty years before you were born."

"It was her…" was all the humanmaid could say.

"Yes, and now you _know_ just how much your actions have devalued your life in front of others, _and_ in front of Heaven! Deliberately changing the destiny of a soul to make him NOT become a Waiting One nearly caused YOUR soul to be forfeited right HERE! And just so you know, the only ones who would have missed you would have been Tex and your mother, and it was because of THEM that Mary didn't kill you! But even so, in judgment, there is mercy. If there were no mercy, you would have been killed here, but now you've been given this final warning. I hope you heed it."

"It was her…"

"You also heard the Voice that stopped her. There is judgment ready for you, if you don't make amends and change your ways. Now, come on!" He whipped the reins again, and the sleigh was airborne once more. "We'll go back to your own time now, because you must see how the rest of the 'Unproductive' and the 'Freaks' spend Christmas!"

"It was her…"

They flew back to their own time, and back to California, and from there began a trip around the world the likes of which Dakota had never seen.

Dakota Dee saw a world of toons that she never knew existed. They stopped at a homeless shelter, and saw Furrball happily serving turkey to everyone. They stopped at countless hospitals, churches, temples, and even synagogues, that were celebrating the _original_ meaning of the holiday. But they didn't stop there. They went on to thousands of homes, of all races, nationalities, languages, and economic levels, meeting toons who, by the look of their faces, were joyous in celebrating the holiday, presents or no presents. They even stopped at an oil platform in the middle of a raging ocean. On the bridge there were several humans, a camel, a jackal, and a fennec, who were sitting at a table; the camel serving a meagre chicken dinner, while the fennec was operating his laptop, making it play Christmas carols it had stored on mp3's. And all were singing "Joy To The World" apparently in Arabic, and quite happily at that. The ghost poured gold on all of them, and continued. Another stop was at a prison, where a group of visitors had organised a celebration for the inmates, and all were singing "God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen" in what sounded like Romanian. Another stop at another prison, where there were two inmates in a dark cell, suddenly brightened by the ghost's presence. Both were kneeling on their bunks, and speaking very quietly. Then, they both looked up, and the brunette saw that they were Oriental. They turned to each other, and hugged, saying something in what sounded like Chinese.

The teenager was surprised when a subtitle appeared below their faces: "Merry Christmas, brother."

On and on they flew again, this time in a _very_ crowded basement. A teenage boy was standing in the front, speaking quietly, and apparently in Spanish, because Dakota heard the word "Navidad" in his speech. And despite the nearly inhuman conditions, everyone in the room seemed happy. Gold was sprinkled there, and they moved on.

Dakota didn't know for how long they travelled, dropping gold on whoever was giving out of love, whoever was telling others the Message of the season, and whoever was making sacrifices out of the goodness of their heart.

At last, they returned to California, and with a crunch of gravel and sand, landed in what appeared to be an old western ghost town. This she deduced because there was a decayed sign at the entrance of the town that proclaimed:

OLD WESTERN GHOST TOWN

There was no snow, just a mist all throughout. "Why are we stopping here and not the North—" Her question was truncated when she turned and saw the ghost's appearance.

His hair and beard were now extremely silvery and brittle, his eyes had lost their spark, his face was _very_ wrinkled, his suit was thin and faded, and his gloves were cracked. Even the now exhausted and panting reindeer seemed to have aged 50 years in one night, with their thin fur, trembling legs, and crumbling antlers. Rudolph's nose was barely brighter than a candle. "What—what happened to you? And why aren't we at the North Pole?"

His voice was ancient as well. "We—can't fly any more. As I told you before, Dee, I'm not physical—I'm an attitude—a general atmosphere of the time. Very few know how to maintain the spirit of Christmas all year long. That is why I age like this. _There is no home base waiting for me in the Arctic Ocean_."

"But—still, aren't you supposed to be all jolly and giving all that 'ho-ho-ho' business?"

"There is more to me, a Spirit of Christmas, than joy and giving. There's also truth, sternness, and self-defence if necessary. A brother of mine had to give some children _weapons_ during one Christmas in Narnia—"

"Brother?"

"Yes, I have some 2,000 of them right now."

"Wow, that's a big—AAAAAHHHH! THERE'S SOMEONE ON THE BACK OF THE SLEIGH!" The teenager shrieked, jumping out of it.

The ghost turned stiffly and saw that the red bag, which was barely half-empty, was being moved by something under it. He eyed Dakota for a moment, and without hesitation threw back the top of the bag, revealing—

A boy and girl, who, had they received proper nourishment, would have passed for Dakota's younger sister and brother, if she had them. However, they were so thin, so pale, their eyes were sunken, their skin was scaly, their hair was crumbling, their clothes were putrid, and their stench was so repulsive that any monster from any horror movie would have been scared to death. Dakota labelled them as zombies, but even zombies had some sort of life in their eyes, which these two didn't have.

She staggered away from the sleigh, and would have run away, but she couldn't take her eyes off the children. Suppressing another scream, she managed to stutter, "W—who—wh—wh—(CENSORED), I hope they're not YOUR kids!"

Feebly, the ghost replied, "They are humanity's children. They hang on to me, as many others try to hang on to the purely material and temporary, because, yes, they are slaves to commercialism and marketing and society in general. The boy's name is Ignorance; the girl is Want. Be on your guard against these two, in all the forms that they come, but especially the boy. On his forehead is the word DOOM, unless it is erased. And now," he leaned toward the teenager, "I dare you to deny that. I dare you to slander me, and all who tell that to you! _'Admit it for your factious purposes, and make it worse. And bide the end!'_"

Dakota could only watch in horror at the zombies, almost seeing her own distorted face in theirs. "But—don't they have any shelter or orphanage to go to?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Why, Dee, I'm surprised at you. I thought you hated charities even MORE! And would one actually _think_ that because it's Christmas that you're going to think differently?"

Once again, she was slapped in the face by her own words. Turning for a moment, and raising her arms in exasperation, she blurted, "But _I'm_ not the only one who has the power to give! Aren't there enough goody-two-shoes millionaires out there that can keep the charities running? I mean, we BOTH saw that there are plenty of toons out there who give! Why should _I_ be different? What difference would I make?" She stopped for a moment when she heard her watch sound the hourly chime, indicating that it was midnight, AGAIN. She turned to him, "Why am _I_ being singled out as the one responsible for the—demise—of—"

The children were gone.

The bag was gone.

The gold was gone.

The sleigh was gone.

The ghost was gone.

The reindeer were gone.

She looked about, but she was all alone in the Old Western Ghost Town.

"Spirit?"

Silence, not even a cricket chirped.

"Ghost?"

Silence.

"Spectre?"

More silence.

"Apparition? Phantasm?"

Still more silence.

"Santa? Santa Claus?"

Her heart beat horrendously fast, pounding at the insufferable silence.

"Nick? Saint Nicholas?"

Her voice wouldn't even echo.

"Ghost Of Christmas Present?"

She ran down the gravel-covered street, but she was all alone in the oppressive silence and darkness.

"Father Christmas? Nicholas of Bari? ANYONE!"

Suddenly, the silence was broken.

Despite the sound being infinitely hushed, lower than a whisper, the surrounding silence made it sound like a sonic boom that pounded in Dakota's brain and chest. It took her several seconds to identify the sound as the crunch of boots on gravel with an odd metallic counterpoint. If the teenager did not know any better, she would swear that she was hearing spurs. She whirled toward the source of the sound—

—and fading in from the mist, walking toward her with only the sound of his footfalls, was The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come.


	8. Stave 5: The Last of the Spirits

STAVE FIVE - THE LAST OF THE SPIRITS

Dakota Dee had never been so scared in her life. The sight and sound of the ghost tore at her innermost recesses, ripping away all the presumption and pride and greed and hate that she had built for herself. As the ghost came closer, she began to distinguish him from the surrounding darkness. It wore a black cloak and hood, as was expected, but it only reached its waist—a _very_ low waist, she noticed. From the waist down it wore black pants, though its legs were somewhat too short in proportion for its body. It was shod with black boots fitted with spurs, hence the source of the infernal sound. Its oversized chest, torso, arms, and head were perfectly still, and the only movement from it was a rather odd walk that the legs were doing, almost lagging behind the torso above them. It had the right arm raised a bit, and in its hand, something pointed to the starless sky. As it came closer, she identified a black six-shooter in the hand. Closer still, and she saw that the hood didn't completely cover the face, in fact, she could _see_ the face—

"Hey, don't I know you?" Familiarity pushed away some of the terror: a wide face, low eyebrows, and a beard surrounding a jutting jaw. She had _seen_ this face before somewhere, and she _knew_ that, perhaps in a history book, or a documentary, or—

A Looney Toons Short?

Hundreds of faces flashed through her memory, until one suddenly stood out: a face that matched perfectly the character in front of her. Insolence returned with a vengeance, and she stood back, incredulous. "**_NASTY CANASTA!_** _YOU'RE_ the Ghost of Christmas Future?"

"Canasta" stopped in front of her. His skin was paler than what she remembered, but his scowl was still there. His unblinking gaze tore at her insolence, making her feel uneasy.

"No, but really, Canasta! How on Earth did you end up doing this gig? Are things that bad for all you 'Bit Players'?"

Canasta said nothing, but continued to gaze at her, unmoving, not even blinking.

His lack of response filled the brunette with dread. A sudden possibility flashed through her thoughts. "Or—do you just _look_ like Nasty Canasta, and are a ghost, for real?"

No movement, no response.

"But why would you want to look like HIM? I mean, Canasta was, and still is, a perfect unknown! He just showed up to help move a few cartoons along! Why would he be fitting to represent you?" She waited for an answer, and received none. That actually helped her think. "After all, you represent the Future, which no one knows, just—like—him————oh, I get it now. You chose a form I could identify with, while remaining completely unknown, and also have the ability to scare the (CENSORED) out of me, right?"

His glare tore at her so much that she had to turn away. Trying to drown out the infernal silence, and her own terror, she argued, "You know, I've heard of this _incredible_ invention that has revolutionised communication everywhere: it's called SPEECH. If you try that, you COULD get your message through to me much more efficiently."

The ghost showed no amusement nor surprise at her suggestion. She continued, "You're _really_ freaking me out, more than the other two, you know."

Silence.

"Please, you've got a mouth, just SAY SOMETHING!" She didn't know what would be more horrifying: a demonic voice, or the infernal silence that was consuming her, broken only by her own cries. Seeing that she wouldn't get any dialogue from him, she sighed with defeat. "Okay, okay, so you're the Ghost of Christmas Future. You're here to show me what _could_ happen later on. But how are you going to show me anything here? We're in the middle of nowhere!"

Finally, the ghost gestured. He waved his revolver toward a building on Dakota's left. It only took her a moment to deduce that he was telling her where to go. She turned—

—and saw that he was pointing to a saloon.

"You do realise," she explained, turning to him, "that I'm underage, and I can't go into bars for several years yet."

He insisted with his gun.

"Listen, dummy! I can't go in there! I may be evil, but I'm NOT an alcoholic!"

(BANGKAPWIIINNNG!)

Dakota jumped as the bullet ricocheted between her bare feet. Terror and solemn dread filled her again. "O—okay, okay. I'm going." She stumbled across the street and up the wooden sidewalk, not daring to take her eyes off him. The Caucasian pushed open the swinging doors, making them creak on rusted hinges. He followed, again with the clinking of spurs, filling the place with an infernal echo, compared to the silence from her own feet.

The saloon looked like any abandoned and decrepit western saloon, except that there were no tables, chairs, or barstools. There was a bar on the opposite side, but there was nothing behind it. A seemingly endless wall with countless windows completed the front side. Dust, dirt, and sand were everywhere.

"This place looks a lot bigger from the inside than from the outside." A squeaking of rusted hinges, followed by spurs and footfalls on wood, proclaimed that the ghost had entered behind her. She turned to him, "Okay, we're here, and I doubt you're going to buy me a drink. So now what?"

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

The girl slowly straightened from her cringe, her heart running the 100-metre dash. She screamed at him, "What the (CENSORED) was that for, dummy?" His only response was to wave in the direction of the shot. She turned and saw that the first window next to the door was broken—

—then she did a double take when she noticed light coming from outside, but only through _that_ window. Cautiously, she approached it, hoping not to cut herself on the debris, but for her benefit all the broken glass had fallen outside. She looked outside—

—and looked back inside with a raised eyebrow. She looked outside again to make sure that she was seeing what she was seeing. "Now this is decidedly strange," she said to herself, as she examined the scene "outside".

"Outside" was actually "inside".

Or, a window to another room, despite the fact that she knew that the window was in front of the saloon, hence, the window should give a view of the street, but that was not what she was looking at.

Instead, Dakota Dee was looking at the trading floor of the New York Stock Exchange.

Looking closer, she saw that the trading day had finished just a few minutes ago. Then, on the floor, she saw two male teenage human janitors sweeping the myriad of sheets off the floor, and she could hear them talking.

"…died yesterday. It was terrible!"

"I nearly barfed when I read it on the Net last night. Man, I get the creeps just _thinking_ of that type of death!"

"Did the Net say when the funeral is going to be?"

"Funeral? Don't be silly. If he's still as cheap as he is, he'll probably just throw the remains in a hole in a field so he'll only pay for gas and a shovel. In an unmarked grave, too."

The other one chuckled. "Anything to save money. But what about all the assets?"

"He assumes control, of course. I read that he might hold an auction to recover what he invested in that (CENSORED)!" She expected a defence, or even an additional insult at the deceased, but the next answer surprised her.

"An auction? Sounds interesting. I just might go and see if the rumours on the stereo are true. Just might buy it too, if the bids don't go over my savings!"

Dakota wondered why the person and the funeral seemed less important than an auction. She looked back at the ghost, "Who are they talking about? Why would anyone want to throw someone in an unmarked grave, if they can afford a decent funeral? Who were those two referring to?"

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

—was his response.

She straightened up from her sudden flinch again, and saw that he had shot down the second window, without a word. She walked to it, and looked at the next scene.

"AndherewehaveagenuinePanasonicMAX70000onehundredpercentdigitalhomeentertainmentcentrebiddingstartsatfivethousanddollarsdoIhearfivethousanddollarsfivethousanddollarsfiftyonehundreddollars—"

Hands, paws, talons, and wings went up and down as the bids increased. Dakota watched with confusion at the auction in a large white auditorium, wondering why anyone would bid on a stereo that anyone could get—customised—just———like——————hers—

She leaned out and squinted, trying to get a better look at the machine. "Odd," she squeaked, "that—looks a lot like _my_ stereo—" The bidding continued, and she looked at the bidders. Many were businesstoons she knew, and the previous teenage janitor was there, as were a few toon celebrities, even the Warner Brothers and the Warner Sister! She didn't see herself, though, much less an older version of herself. She looked back at the stage where the stereo was being displayed, but then caught sight of someone. Way over on stage right, just outside of the bidders' view, arms crossed, was her father, Montana Max.

Montana had obviously seen better days. His black business suit was well pressed, and his tie was neat, but still, there was a sense of defeat coming from him. His hair wasn't unkept, but it seemed dry and brittle, with a few premature silver strands. His eyes were cold and hard, sunken with weariness. He just stared at the auction, as if it were an IRS audit.

Dakota had never been close to him, but even she couldn't deny that he was in very deep grief. After all, why wouldn't _he_ be taking part of the auction—?

—unless—he had _organised_ the auction————

But why would he? Was he approaching bankruptcy and needed hard cash immediately? And if he did, why didn't he just ask _her_—

The teenager gasped when she saw the next items up for bid.

A computer.

A business desk.

A digital wall clock.

And a king size cedar canopy bed, with orange silk covers and orange curtains

All of which had a very creepy resemblance to HER computer, desk, clock, and bed.

"—SOLDtothegentlemanwiththeredcapthankyousir…"

Someone with a red cap and blue sweater stood from the audience to claim her stereo—no, (CENSORED) it, a stereo that LOOKED like hers! She did a double take and saw that the winner of the bid was none other than Wakko Warner, who was followed by his brother and sister. He leaned back and whispered something to them, but she heard him _very_ clearly, "Faboo, I never knew that someone's death could be such big business…"

The brunette had enough. She pulled away from the window and demanded, "ALL RIGHT, CANASTA! JUST _WHOSE_ STUFF ARE THEY AUCTIONING OFF!"

The ghost just stood there.

She raised angry fists. "(CENSORED) it, you just have to nod YES OR NO! WAS ALL THAT STUFF MINE!"

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

This time, the teenager flinched just in time before the gun went off. Scowling at the ghost, she went to the third window—

—that had completely collapsed, along with part of the wall, leaving enough space for her to walk through if she wished. The sound of boots and spurs against the wood told her that the ghost was following her for this scene.

She poked her head out, and saw a grey room with large cabinets along the walls. There was a large table in the middle of the room, and something cylindrical was in the middle, covered by a white sheet. Looking at a door, she saw on the windowpane the reverse of an eerie label:

MORGUE

"Um, what am I supposed to be looking at here?" she asked. Despite her being deathly afraid, confusion still reigned in her cold heart as well. The ghost waved his gun again, this time, at the sheet and the cylinder under it. The teenager eyed him with dread, and proceeded to the table.

"_Oh cold, cold, rigid, dreadful Death, set up thine altar here, and dress it with such terrors as thou hast at thy command: for this is thy dominion! But of the loved, revered, and honoured head, thou canst not turn one hair to thy dread purposes, or make one feature odious. It is not that the hand is heavy and will fall down when released; it is not that the heart and pulse are still; but that the hand was open, generous, and true; the heart brave, warm, and tender; and the pulse a toon's. Strike, Shadow, strike! And see the good deeds springing from the wound, to sow the world with life immortal!"_

She didn't know if the previous paragraph was spoken by the ghost, or if it just ran through her own mind. She was one second away from yanking the sheet off when a sudden realisation made her turn paler than ever before.

This was the _morgue_.

Morgues are where dead people are kept.

Except that here, in toonity, toons don't die.

That is, they _rarely_ die.

And the ways in which they died, documented so graphically back in 1988, could fill any toon with unspeakable horror.

If there was a dead toon on the table, then the sheet would have a shape of a body, which it presumably covered.

But here, there was no body under the sheet, as the shape proclaimed.

Under the sheet there was a CAN.

And with what she knew about toon anatomy, the only reason why a CAN would be in a morgue would be because it contained the dissolved aniplasm of a toon—

—destroyed by DIP.

She realised why the janitor was so creeped out by this type of toon death, so she staggered back into the drawers. Despite the fact that there was no dip in the can, she didn't dare look at its contents. And if this was a normal morgue, the name of the dead toon would be printed on the side of the can.

The ghost insisted.

"No," she hissed at him. "I do NOT have to look under there! And just who died that no one cares? Who died that not even the Warner Brothers respect?"

He stopped waving, but continued scowling at her.

"Death by dip is something every toon fears, my friend. Something so tragic would have brought along SOME emotion! Doesn't anyone respect or feel ANYTHING about a death as tragic as this?"

For a moment, the ghost twirled his gun, as if thinking something, and then backed out of the room. The girl followed him—

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

—just in time to cringe involuntarily at the gunshot and the crashing of glass. She looked out the next window, and saw that she was looking at a strange place, so strange, it reminded her of—

"Wackyland?"

It was indeed Wackyland, for all the crazy colours and shapes and characters in it proclaimed it so. Many strange characters were gathered, and apparently anxious, when suddenly a hole opened in mid-air above them, and Gogo Dodo jumped out with the hole closing behind him.

"Gogo!" shouted a giant pen. "Were you able to get her to agree to another extension?"

"No," he replied, somewhat sad. "But we may still be able to get out of this mess!"

"How? There's _no way_ she'll give us even a discount! She's worse than her father!"

"Well, actually, the extension sorta came by itself. She's dead." The reactions of the toons more than shocked her. For one second their expressions seemed to be of grief and sadness, but suddenly—

—they CHEERED.

And some actually knelt to thank God in Heaven.

Amidst the joy over someone's death, the Pen approached Gogo, "But—what happens to the loan now?"

"The bank will decide whether they take it or give it back to her father. But it will take _weeks_ to decide, so we have more time to raise the cash to pay off the loan!"

The additional cheering sickened the teenager to no end. She turned and hoisted herself up to the ghost's face, "NO, YOU IDJIT! Show me any kind of **_GRIEF_** over that toon's death!" The ghost's glare bore into her eyes as he twirled his gun again, thinking.

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

She let go of him and unstopped her ear. Looking out the next broken window, she saw that she was finally looking "outside" at a hill. It was a sunny day, but the air seemed filled with sadness and grief. In front of her was a large crowd composed of toons she knew. There were The Fourteen with their younger brothers, sisters, and their parents, slightly older; Nigel and RuBarb Carrotte, with Nolan and Talleen, slightly older as well; Adam and Lizbeth Fox, with A.J.; all the Tiny Toons, all the Looney Toons, The J.A.M. and his family, Erik and Jessimyn Wolf, with Jason, Jasmine, rabbit twins, and Lilly, a young wolf cub; Rupert and Lillian Carrotte, Viktor and Amanda Norka, and leading the crowd, were a very distressed Lionel and Miranda Carrotte.

All were dressed in black.

All were standing next to an open pit.

And all ears and tails were low.

Since there was a wolverine minister officiating the ceremony, Dakota deduced that this was none other than a funeral.

But whose? The casket was small, so it was obviously of someone who died young—

"…and bidding her farewell—" (CENSORED), she missed the name and species! Quickly looking around, she didn't see herself, just her mother, making her panic once again, "—even though many of us never even had a chance to say hello." Then he read from his Book, paraphrasing, "For now she should lie down and be quiet. She should sleep, and then she would be at rest with kings and counsellors of the earth, who built up waste places for themselves, or with princes who had gold, who filled their houses with silver, or as a hidden untimely birth—though not totally hidden, as she had been—now part of the infants who never saw light. There the wicked cease from troubling. There the weary are at rest. There the prisoners are at ease together. They don't hear the voice of the taskmaster. The small and the great are there. The servant is free from his master." He looked up, "And sadly, she did not see her parents, her relatives, nor this world. Still, she received love, and she will always be remembered as one who fought and did not quit, but though she did not achieve victory over her ailment, her death will be considered a sacrifice, because her condition and demise opened a huge realm of knowledge and hope, enabling doctors and scientists to see what went wrong, thus laying the groundwork—the seed—of the research that will help prevent this from happening to others, a process that would have taken much more time—and lives—than if this tragedy had not occurred. She will not be forgotten, and she will be considered a hero, and will live on in the legacy she left behind: The Norka-Carrotte Hybridisation Research Foundation. She died—so that others may live." Leo and Miranda's sobbing increased.

Dakota, meanwhile, felt as if something had been snatched from her, namely, the credit to all the research she did, which would now go to the Carrottes.

The minister turned to his Book again, "Behold, I tell you a mystery. We will not all die, but we will all be changed, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised incorruptible, and we will be changed. For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and this mortal must put on immortality. But when this corruptible puts on incorruption, and this mortal puts on immortality, then what is written will happen: 'Death is swallowed up in victory.' 'Death, where is your sting? Grave, where is your victory?'"

Dakota saw that his words of comfort didn't seem to have much effect on Lionel or Miranda, who were now sobbing almost uncontrollably.

And she _knew_ that they couldn't be crying for _her_.

"This is the funeral of the Carrotte's baby," she told the ghost, slightly awed by the grief caused by a "freak". "And I _know_ the baby wouldn't have been able to own that stereo or be a creditor to a loan. Who was everyone talking about at the Exchange? The auction? And Wackyland? Was it—was it—" She barely had enough strength to consider that possibility, but after seeking within herself, she asked, "—was it _me_?"

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

This time, she was looking at a snowfall, toward a window on a mansion—her mansion! And she was looking at the window that led to her office—

—and saw through the glass and translucent curtains, her father, sitting on the recliner, looking blankly at the burning fireplace. "D-Dad?" she asked weakly, rarely having addressed him directly with that term. Looking closer she saw someone on her desk busy typing away at the computer, but it wasn't her. Odd thing though, the worker looked like a chicken, a _giant_ ch—

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

Once again, she was looking outside, not at a graveyard, but at a large open field, several hundred metres from a highway. "What's supposed to be here? It's just the middle of nowhere!" As was expected, the ghost gave her no answer. "Boy, you really like to talk, don't you?" She turned back to the scene, and it appeared to be zooming in on someone, "Look, the night is about to end, but I _have_ to know something. I have the feeling all of the toons were talking about _me_, but tell me: are all these events set in stone?" The ghost said nothing. "Or—are they written on _paper with a pencil_? Can they be changed?" The scene zoomed closer. "I, more than anyone, know that one event can alter the course of history with huge repercussions. Can the same be said for all of what you've shown me? Or—is everything—" she shivered, "final?"

The ghost's only response was to wave his gun at the scene in front of her. She turned—

—and saw Tex, standing in the middle of the field, wearing sackcloth, with ashes on his head and drooped ears. "Tex? What is he doing here? And why is he wearing all that? What's wrong with him?"

She then saw the grieving buck pull out a rose out of nowhere, and lay it down in front of a very small headstone. She didn't know for how long he had been standing there, but his swollen eyes and worn incisors made her deduce that he had been there for quite a while. At last, he spoke with a choked voice, hindered by heavy sobs, "It—it didn't have to end this way! Not like this! He refused to put you in a decent plot—and gave you an unmarked grave! I—I didn't—mind—paying for the headstone—sorry it's so small—it's all I could afford—my brothers didn't want to lend me any money—for it—" He shook his head, and covered his eyes, "If you'd only listened—! Now—now _my_ payment for what I felt for you—will continue—for now—and until Kingdom come—I'm so sorry, Dee—!" At that, the green buck turned, and slowly padded away from the stone. The teenager saw him pad toward a tree in the distance, where a female toon was waiting, though she was too far away to identify her.

Now it was only Dakota and the tombstone. She knew she had to look at it, but she wouldn't dare. She turned to the ghost again—

—and saw that he was waving his gun at the stone, _very insistently_.

Finally, the girl grit her teeth, whirled, and looked at the tombstone.

DAKOTA DEE DUFF MAXIMILIAN

Loved by only one toon.

She staggered back into the saloon, the name on the stone burning into her heart.

She couldn't scream.

She couldn't cry.

She couldn't speak.

She couldn't think.

She struggled and struggled, staggering back to the broken window, blurting at last, "WHERE are my parents? My relatives? My GLORIOUS funeral? My mausoleum? Is this how it all ends? Is this what everything I've done leads to?" Pale, nearly white, including her pyjamas, she turned to the ghost, "Is—is this how it all ends?"

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

She was so frightened that she actually screamed and jumped at the gunshot. Trembling, she approached the next window.

She was now looking at the halls of Acme Looniversity. And by the lack of textiles on several furry toons, she deduced that it was International Nekkid Day. She saw Tex walking by, wearing nothing but his fur, and apparently showing off chest muscles she didn't know he had, especially now that he was taller. She was ogling him to the point that she didn't notice him padding past a young black female kitten with green eyes.

"Oh, wow," said Talleen, also ogling him—

(CLONG!)

—right before walking into a locker, startling both the humanmaid and herself. "Oooowww…"

The green buck suddenly turned back, and asked her with concern, "You okay, Tally?"

The dazed kitten replied with low ears, "Uh…yeah. Gotta watch where I'm going."

"Well, okay, you be careful there."

"Right." She gave him a toothy smile and went on her way, ears still laid back. As she did, she muttered, "Oh THANK you mixed up DNA! Half rat, so I find rodentia attractive!"

Tex looked back at the young hybrid, whose curves were just starting to come in through her thick fur, and thought, "She's going to end up a fine female."

Seeing the look in his eye, the brunette knew where all of this was headed. She fumed, "Brat! She's not even old enough to be in high school! What does he SEE in her?"

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

Her previous terror was now replaced with insane jealousy, to the point that the sudden noise didn't faze her at all. She just moved to the next window, where again she saw the cemetery. Lionel and Miranda were there again, just them and no one else this time, and the couple was placing a large bouquet of flowers next to the small headstone.

She turned away a bit as remorse and guilt came on Dakota once again—

She screamed and nearly wet herself again, as she jumped away from the sudden apparition beside her.

Standing beside the window was a very young female furry toon, no more than 5 years old, she seemed. At first, the teenager couldn't identify what species she was, but upon a closer look, the youngster's features revealed her taxonomic classification.

She had almond brown fur, with a sandy brown patch covering her muzzle and abdomen. Her shape was vaguely like a rabbit, but her ears were half their normal length, like a coney or pika. Her proportions, though being of a 5-year old, seemed larger than they should be. Her torso was somewhat cylindrical and long, or at least her arms seemed shorter than normal. Her legs and foot-paws, though rabbit-like, also seemed somewhat shorter and stubbier than they should be. Her tail was twice as long as a rabbit's, however, though it ended in a dovetail shape. Short rabbit incisors peeked lightly from her muzzle.

By all means, this toon—who had appeared out of nowhere—would have caused anyone to consider her cute and loveable, and perhaps attempt to hug her.

Dakota, however, was scared out of her wits. This was partially because the toon was transparent, and had a faint light-blue glow around her, indicating that she was a spirit. The humanmaid was also reeling at the look in that toon's blue eyes, and from her reactions, one would think that the little spirit was glaring daggers at the teenager.

Instead, the kit's eyes were radiating the most warm and innocent love and affection that few kits could muster. So much love and affection, in fact, that the Caucasian couldn't stand it; it was practically stripping her of every gram of contempt, pride, arrogance, greed, and hate, leaving her soul practically naked: a lonely little girl who only wanted attention, comfort, and love.

And then came the _coup d'grace_: the spirit of the kit smiled at her, multiplying her radiance of love and affection a hundredfold, and multiplied even more by her ethereal voice that echoed all over the saloon, and all over Dakota's mind and soul:

"I forgive you."

There was no mockery, no sarcasm, no hint of the vaguest form of deception. They were only three words, but they carried so much love and grace and mercy that they penetrated Dakota to the bone marrow, and to the darkest parts of her mind and soul.

If Dakota didn't know better, this kit spoke with a voice that sounded a bit like…like that girl from that Harry Potter movie.

If Dakota didn't know better, she swore she could see carnivore fangs beside the lagomorph incisors.

If Dakota didn't know better, she knew who the parents of this kit were.

If Dakota didn't know better, this kit looked as if she was going to hug her.

If Dakota didn't know better, this kit looked as if she was going to give her a kiss as well.

The spirit of the kit jumped and practically pounced on the teenager—

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

—meaning that Dakota jumped and screamed at the next gunshot and crash. She felt the kit grab her, and yet she didn't. The move was so sudden that the whole thing felt like a sudden warm breeze that ironically chilled her to the marrow, and as soon as the kit made contact, she disappeared. Still, Dakota could almost feel something damp on her left cheek.

Moving to the next window, she saw the field where her nearly unmarked grave was, and an older Tex was standing in front of it, ears down. "…Leo promised that he would wait until Miranda was ready to try again—but I don't think that's ever going to happen now, even with all the lives that their research foundation has saved up till now. She really _did_ die so that others may live. It's really amazing, you know: since their daughter died all the research just _snowballed_, and because of that the hybrid infant mortality rate has all but disappeared—and—and all the credit could have been yours—" he trailed off. He looked up and sighed, "Things—could have been different—so very different…" He just looked at the sky, not crying, or even grinding his teeth. Then, he took a deep breath, looked at the stone again, and declared, "I'm not going to be coming here anymore, Dee. I'm—I'm moving on, like Leo and Miranda will—hopefully—someday." He straightened up and sighed, "Farewell, Dee. I'll always remember you." With that last statement, he placed his last rose on the lonely grave, and left the field. Dakota saw him pad toward the same female toon as before: and now she knew that it was none other than Talleen, apparently thirteen years old now. They shared a sad smile, and padded away, holding paws.

Dakota blurted, "That's it? Even HE'S leaving me? But, how—HOW can he leave me, like that—? I'll be all alone…"

Alone…alone…alone…alone…alone…alone…alone…

Anger filled her again, and she hissed with clenched fists, "HOW can he go off with that little—that little—(CENSORED)!" she blurted, "What does he SEE in her?" Though Talleen's figure alerted her that if her present course remained unchanged, Dakota would not be able to physically develop any further. Slowly, she opened her hands and stared at them, remembering all she had seen, and all she had done. "W—what—what did he see in ME?" She looked up to the couple as they became smaller and smaller. "What—could have made him stay with me for so long—after what I did to his friends—what I did to his family———what I did to———him———"

At that moment, she remembered Tex's kiss.

The kiss that she blatantly ignored afterward, despite her being so stunned when it happened.

She mumbled, "It was—the first time—someone kissed me—like that—" Realising the present implications, she added, "And it might be the last—" Desperation now overcame her. "What—what made you stay with me, despite all I did? What made you be the only one at my funeral, and the only one to ever visit my grave?" she asked the shadow of Tex, as she placed a hand on the shattered glass. "Why am I still in your head? What did I do to deserve—"

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

She whirled back to the ghost. "Th-there's still more? What more can you possibly show me that is worse than this?"

He just waved his gun to the next broken window. Obediently now, the humanmaid walked over and looked out.

And what she saw made her, and her clothes, and her hair, turn completely white.

It was a dark alley, blanketed with dirty snow. A homeless grey dog was trying to warm himself next to a steel drum that had a very low fire inside.

And further inside the alley Dakota saw the white-blue ghost of herself.

She barely recognised herself, for though she was transparent, and wore a tattered business blouse and skirt, the entire figure of her ghost was wrapped with chains long and large enough to moor a cruise ship. Huge bags of gold ingots, bills, and coins were attached to the links. They were transparent as well, but barely enough for Dakota to identify the face of the tortured soul inside them. Eerie clanking rang with every step she took. "Howard Hughes wasn't kidding, was he?" Dee murmured, as she watched her ghost self through the window. "That—that's a _lot_ of chain..." The ghost above her said nothing, but just held up his gun as it continued to smoke. The teenager whispered, "…I don't want to be alone…" and saw her ghost trudge on, trying to get to the dog to give him a small piece of dry wood to help with the fire, but suddenly the ghost stumbled and fell with infernal clanking as one of the links snagged on something. Dakota looked closer, and saw that it got stuck on a dime that was on the ground. "What? How can chains get snagged on a dime?" she mused, mystified. The ghost tugged and tugged, and even tried backing up, but the dime acted like a spike that kept her from reaching her goal.

"This is—this is—this can't—"

(BANGCRASH!)

(…tinkletinkletinkle…)

She never knew that terror could reach the intensity that it had reached with her. Visibly shaking, with trembling legs, she approached the last window.

She was looking at a bedroom, a very elaborately furnished one, but there was no light save for the burning fireplace. The furniture seemed familiar—

The brunette gasped when she realised she was looking at her _father's_ bedroom. Standing next to the fireplace was not her aged father, but an adult yellow male lop rabbit with white headfur, clad in black silk boxers. For a moment, she thought she was looking at Tex's brother, Mel, but then she realised that this _couldn't_ be Mel. The yellow shade of his fur was somewhat darker, his ears lopped but seemed longer, and the face was similar, but not exactly like Mel's, even allowing for age progression.

The lagomorph appeared to be speaking to an empty chair, but slowly, the listener came into view.

The Caucasian gasped when she saw him speaking to _the ghost of herself_, still wrapped in chains.

"Please," he huffed, "you must be confused. Montana Max doesn't live here anymore because _I_ threw him out! Besides, you're a human; I'm a rabbit. How could I _possibly_ be your son?"

"You read my biography," Dakota's ghost's voice was very faint and nearly screechy. "You followed my example, you do the things I did, so then you're my son, Howard Hughes' son, _and_ Jacob Marley's son as well! And with every act of greed and corruption _you_ do **_I_** receive more and more punishment! But what I have is _nothing_ compared to what YOU will get if you don't heed the spirits' warnings!"

"Oh, come on. My father was greedy and nothing happened to him!"

"That's because he changed before it was too late!" she replied, looking at a portrait on the wall. Dakota, too, looked up, and saw that the buck's father was Tex's younger brother, Mel!

Dakota staggered back from the window.

History was repeating itself in the most horrifying way she had ever seen.

She never married, but she had children: those willing to follow the legacy she left behind.

She had wanted to lead, and now she was leading others.

Now, and _forever_.

And the dividends of her actions would continue to accumulate until the end of time: reaching returns of 3,000, 6,000, and 10,000 per cent.

"**_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"_** She flung herself at the apparition, hoisting herself up his tunic so she could look at him in the eye. "PLEASE! Can these events be altered in any way? Can I have another end if I do things differently?"

Silence.

"No," she sobbed, "it can't end like this...!" She wept into the ghost's tunic, who actually seemed to show some emotion as he tried to lean away, as if he was repulsed by the toon holding him. At that moment, he became transparent, allowing the girl to fall through him and hit the floor hard. She continued sobbing, as something else came to her mind. _"'If these shadows remain unaltered,'"_ Dakota quoted from Dickens. "If _I_ don't change, that's how it will end." She looked up at the ghost and pleaded, "What must I do to avoid this? What is it that I have to do to change this future?"

Silence.

"PLEASE! If you have ever talked, TALK NOW! I don't want to risk any misinterpretations here! Can I avoid this?"

The ghost twirled his gun again for a moment. Then, with his other hand, he reached into his tunic, pulled out a paper, and let it fall in front of her. She clutched it like she would grab a gold ingot, sat up, and read:

"…when I say to the evil man, 'You will die,' if he turns from his evil and does what is lawful and right, gives back what he stole, and is guided by the rules of life, doing no evil, he will certainly live, and will not die. None of the evil he did will be accounted against him: he has done what is lawful and right, he will certainly live..."

"…when the evil man, turning away from his evil-doing, does what is lawful and right, he will live…"

She re-read the passage.

"…he will certainly live, and will not die…"

And re-read it.

"…None of the evil that he did will be accounted against him…"

And read it one more time to make sure it said what she thought it said, but this time, she applied it to _her_.

"…None of the evil that _she_ did will be accounted against her…"

"Is this correct?" she asked him with urgency. "I can avoid this?"

And for the only time in this visit, the ghost nodded.

She turned away, her face unusually bright, "Yes! I can avoid this! It doesn't have to happen! I can stop all this! I can live! I can save myself! I can alter the future! I can—"

She turned to him again, but—

—He was gone.

She immediately ran outside, stumbling on the steps. She glanced everywhere, but she was completely alone.

And cold.

Trans-Siberian Orchestra

"The Lost Christmas Eve"

THE LOST CHRISTMAS EVE

© 2004 Lava Records

She just stood there now, as whatever light there was seemed to focus on her.

_"On a street in the night—in the cold winter's light_

_A child stands alone and she's waiting."_ She hugged herself, shivering.

_"And the light that's out there: it just hangs in the air_

_As if it was just—hesitating."_ She looked up at the light, and saw snowflakes floating down.

"_And the snow: it comes down, and it muffles the sound_

_Of dreams on their way to tomorrow."_ She shook her head in complete despair, all hope of redemption gone.

"_And when they appear this night will hold them near,_

_For where they will lead it will follow."_ She thought she saw another light in the distance, and walked toward it.

"_For here in this city of lights—!"_ Ghosts of cities faded around her.

"—_This evening awakens the dreams that it might!"_ She stumbled as ghosts of the visits she did faded in as well.

_"The winter it conjures the spells it will weave!"_ Gusts blew around her.

_"The snow gently covers the ground—"_ And she made tracks on the fresh snow.

"…_Christmas Eve…"_ But suddenly there was no more light. She turned and ran back to the saloon.

"_In this scene on this night—there's an ancient hotel_

_Where shadows they do tend to wander."_ Once inside, she gasped. The three ghosts were talking to each other!

"_And the ghosts that live here hold each moment so dear_

_For time's not a thing one should squander."_ Apparently a grim discussion, for they were shaking their heads.

"_And they recount their sand as it runs through their hand_

_And examine each moment for meaning."_ Shadows faded around them, and they commented on how Dakota had scoffed at them all.

_"It can be wished upon till the moment it's gone_

_Like day disappears into evening."_ They took one look at Dakota, and vanished again.

"_For here in this city of lights—!"_ She ran to where they had stood; Acme Acres now in one of the windows.

_"—This evening awakens the dreams that it might_!" There was no one to comfort her.

_"The winter it conjures; the moment is seized!"_ More gusts blew.

"_The snow gently covers the ground—"_ And she felt more and more chills. She thought she saw a scene of a Christmas tree, but it was too faint to be sure.

"…_Christmas Eve…"_ Just then, the rabbit-mink kit appeared in front of her again, and she was giving her the smile that somehow brought terror to her heart, a smile that showed that the cub didn't hold any grudges toward the humanmaid, a smile that declared—

**FORGIVENESS**

The kit then happily spoke two words that resonated through Dakota's head bringing her even more terror:

"…Merry Christmas…merry Christmas…merry Christmas…merry Christmas…"

She staggered back; the happiness and forgiveness the kit was radiating was somehow producing more terror than all the scenes she saw before. Suddenly more ghostly images appeared all around her, saying one word:

Junior, _"…Christmas…"_

Alexi, _"…Christmas…"_

Miriam, _"…Christmas…"_

Tex, _"…Christmas…"_

Friz, _"…Christmas…"_

Shotsy, _"…Christmas…"_

Morty, _"…Christmas…"_

Bekki, _"…Christmas…"_

June,_ "…Christmas…"_

Hunni, _"…Christmas…"_

Anni, _"…Christmas…"_

Mel, _"…Christmas…"_

Buck, _"…Christmas…"_

Chuck, _"…Christmas…"_

Talleen, _"…Christmas…"_

Nolan, _"…Christmas…"_

The J, _"…Christmas…"_

Jason, _"…Christmas…"_

Jasmine, _"…Christmas…"_

Lillian, _"…Christmas…"_

The M, _"…Christmas…"_

A.J., _"…Christmas…"_

Roberta, _"…Christmas…"_

Mary Melody, _"…Christmas…"_

_"Throuuugh…this night—the dream still wanders—"_ At last, they were gone.

_"As iiiit…was meaaaant…to beeee…"_ She was alone once again.

"_And eeeevery yeeeear this night grows fonder—"_ Tex's face remained in her memory, for some reason.

"_Of children and circumstance caught in this childhood dance!"_ She remembered her time in Soho.

_"As the world turns around keeping dreams on the ground!"_ And the sled landing here.

_"Windows of frosted ice, prisming candlelight!"_ (BANGCRASH!)

_"And somehow we start to believe—"_ Maybe—maybe there _was_ something to Tex's religion—

"_IN THE **NIGHT** AND THE **DREAM** AS IT **CUTS** THROUGH THE **NOISE**!"_ Suddenly everything was disappearing!

"_WITH THE **WHISPER** OF **SNOW** AS IT **STARTS** TO **DEPLOY**!"_ As if the gusts were taking apart the saloon, the whole town!

"_IN THE **DEPTHS** OF A **NIGHT** THAT'S **ABOUT** TO **BEGIN**!"_ Darkness surrounded her, broken only by the snow as it kept on piling up.

"_WITH THE **FEELING** OF **SNOW** AS IT **MELTS** ON YOUR **SKIN**!"_ She ran through the snow, but there was nowhere to go.

"_AND IT **COVERS** THE LAND WITH A **DREAM** SO INTENSE!"_ Just a blanket of snow everywhere, and darkness above.

"_THAT IT **RETURNS** US ALL TO A **CHILD'S** INNOCENCE!"_ She remembered her time with her family before Soho.

"_AND THEN **WHAT** YOU'D THOUGHT LOST AND COULD **NEVER** RETRIEVE!"_ And then at Acme Elementary.

"_IS SUDDENLY THERE TO BE FOUND—!"_ She looked up.

"_ON CHRISTMAS EEEEEEEVE!"_ One lone Star shone brightly in the sky, spotlighting her.

"_ON CHRISTMAS EEEEEEEVE!"_ She knew what the Star was representing.

The cold finally got to her, and she collapsed on her knees. Terror continued to hound her; the blatant forgiveness of that kit was still bringing unspeakable torture on her. She couldn't weep, she couldn't scream, she was just left all alone in an icy Hell. She could only shiver, and remember, but more than remember, the images of the visions replayed endlessly and mercilessly through her head: of Tex's pleadings, of the Warnings, of how she chose the Dark Side, of how she treated J and how she rejected him, of Miranda's baby, and now, of her future, and the decision that Tex would eventually make. The more she thought about Tex, the colder it got, and she _couldn't_ get him out of her mind, not even by closing her eyes. It had been _him_ who gave her the Warnings, after all. Thinking about it, she now pondered on all who had affected her plans. And just when she thought it couldn't get any colder—

Trans-Siberian Orchestra

"The Lost Christmas Eve"

THE LOST CHRISTMAS EVE

© 2004 Lava Records

—she opened her eyes and saw her bed curtains, and past them, the closed balcony doors

She gasped, her mind suddenly crashing to a halt. Jumping to her feet, she ran around the room, making sure everything was where it was last night: the balcony doors, the smouldering fireplace, her carpet, and the large main doors—

It had been real.

She glanced at the clock, incredulous that it proclaimed the time to be 6:00 am of Christmas Day, of that exact same year.

"It was all done in one night," she whispered to herself. Slowly, she walked to the balcony doors and pulled away the curtains, to see the new day, and the snow covered landscape.

She had never felt so relieved in her life. She had been warned of her actions, and shown the future that would happen if she didn't change. The last warnings kept repeating in her mind, that if she turned and corrected her ways, she would be safe from destruction, the same destruction that she had wanted for J and his father.

And then, another memory flashed through her mind:

"It was _her_…"

Remembering some more, she realised something else:

"It was **_them_**…"


	9. Stave 6: Aftershocks

STAVE SIX - AFTERSHOCKS

That night, a female teenage human rang the doorbell of a large two-story cream-coloured house. She could hear music and laughing inside, typical of a Christmas party.

An adult human answered the door, and was shocked to see who it was. "Dee?" he asked incredulously.

She managed a feeble smile. "Hi, Uncle Duncan—I—I changed my mind—can—can I come in, please?"

The elder smiled and gave her a big hug, nearly suffocating her. "Well, OF COURSE you can come in! Guys! Dee's here! She's going to celebrate with us!" The rest of her relatives stopped what they were doing, and turned to the door to see if they had heard correctly. When they saw Dakota, they gasped for a moment, but then cheered and clapped as she was brought in.

The Prodigal had come home.

"Say, Uncle, you—um—know I have lots of money—you didn't actually buy a present for me, did you?"

He patted her back, "Well, actually, I did. You may have everything you want, but even so, I know you may not have all you need. Come, I'll show you…"

That family had a very interesting celebration that night, and many were happy, thinking that the Prodigal had finally come home to reconcile herself with them.

But that was _not_ the end of it.


	10. Stave 7: The End of It

STAVE SEVEN - THE END OF IT

Christmas came and went, and so did New Years. The young toons soon returned to school, and everything proceeded normally. Valentine's Day passed, then spring break, then Passover, Memorial Day, and Mother's Day. School closed for the summer, allowing the young ones to relax and have fun. Many families were happy that summer, tough not all of them. Summer ended, and with it, vacation, and the toons returned to school for another academic year. Thus came September, then October, at the end of which many toons celebrated Halloween. And shortly after that came November, and with it, Thanksgiving.

Nearly a whole year had passed since Dakota's encounter with the three spirits. During all this time, she became distant, even to her parents. She rarely talked to anyone, much less The J, The M, The Fourteen, or their friends. Whatever time she didn't spend at school, she spent in her mansion, never going outside, but apparently engrossed in a very involving project. The Fourteen didn't know what to make of her: she never attacked them once throughout the year, never played a prank, or even hurled an insult at them, not a single unkind word. Some thought that she had decided to stop being a villain and turn from the Dark Side, but others weren't sure that was the reason. Even her father wasn't completely sure what was going on with his daughter.

During the summer, Dakota spent every day in her basement, working and working and working non-stop on whatever she was planning, and it was on a summer night that a small exchange took place. The girl was working at a table, testing chemicals and containers, repeatedly dipping one of her hairs in a liquid to watch it dissolve, when she heard the door behind her open, and then footsteps approach her.

"Hello, father," she said blankly, without turning to look at him.

"Hello, Dakota," he replied. His voice had deepened over the years. He looked at the lab coat that covered his daughter, in contrast to his charcoal business suit. "This is a big project you're working on, isn't it?"

"Oh, yes, very big. So big it just _might_ even surprise _you_."

"It might, it might," he pondered, looking at the project table, and all the notes and computers nearby. Many reminded him of his antics with Buster, Plucky, and all their friends, but the complexity of whatever she was doing went beyond anything he did.

"Is it time for dinner?" she asked.

"No, no, it isn't. I just came to tell you that I'll be going to Aruba this week with your mother. If you wish to come, you can. You look like you could use some sun."

For a while, she just kept working, but then replied, "Thanks for the offer, Dad. I might be taking a break soon."

With that, the older toon turned and left. Just before he shut the door, he stopped and turned. "Dakota?"

"Yes, father?"

"I don't know all that's going on with you and those you deal with, but I know plenty more than you think I know, and I have _some_ idea what you're doing now. And you will carry out what you're planning, and I will say that it just _might_ work." His daughter replied nothing at that. "But just remember this: toon villainy is something that's easy to dismiss in the courts. The best defence you have is that you're acting in character. _True evil_, though, usually involves evidence, forensics, alibis, and eye witnesses; you know, all the stuff that the _real_ world has to deal with." Still no response. "Just think about that as you carry out your plan."

At that, the teenager finally stopped, and slowly turned. "I'll keep that in mind, Dad," was all she said. She resumed her work, and Montana Max left.

Several weeks and many experiments later, she held up a flask of liquid, and scowled at it. Then she plucked out a hair from her head, and dipped it. Pulling it out, she saw that it remained intact.

She smiled, at last.

Finally, it was Christmas time again, and all students left school for two weeks. On the night of the final school day of the year, in a lair somewhere in Acme Forest, a black jaguar cub padded up to his father, a properly spotted jaguar in a black t-shirt, who was calculating some invoices on the living room table, with his wife, an African American human.

"Hey, Dad?"

"Yes, J?"

"The Bunnies invited us to a party!"

"A party?" he asked, both parents looking up. The cub handed his father the invitation, which he opened and read. "Well, what do you know? So we have! Hmm—I think we can make it, _our_ party won't be until next week. I wonder why they're having their party earlier—"

"Hey, Mom?" A tall female African-American human teenager, with jaguar-print hair and orange eyes, entered the living room. "I just got an e-mail from Buster and Babs! It seems they're holding a party and they're inviting us!"

Mary Melody M. turned to her. "Another? It wouldn't happen to be this one, would it?"

The M read J's invitation. "Well, what do you know? It is!"

The J.A.M. smiled, "Well, it looks like we're going to a party!"

Several days later, the family climbed on their dark green pick-up truck, and drove to the city. They followed the address to a rather lone area of Acme Acres, one in the early stages of development. There were a few finished buildings around, and most were barely on their way up. Finally, they stopped at a large dark blue unit that proclaimed in its façade:

SALON DE FIESTAS

"A party salon?" asked Mary, translating the sign literally, from what Spanish she had acquired from her husband over the years.

"A party 'hall', actually, a building specially built for having parties, especially kids parties. Those are common in Mexico, but this is the first one I've seen here."

"Maybe Buster and Babs found it and wanted to be the first to hold a party here?" asked The M as they all stepped out.

"That sounds like something Babs would do," replied her mother. "She always did like breaking things in. And speaking of her, here she comes!" A line of dirt zigzagged between the sparse pavement and concrete, and stopped right at the corner where the hall was. The ground burst open and Buster and Babs hopped out, holding a baby carriage that held four squirming kits. Their fourteen older kits hopped out moments later, with Junior, Alexi, and Miriam holding the paws of three toddlers.

"Hey, you're here!" exclaimed the mother doe.

"Yes, we are," replied the jaguar father, as-a-matter-of-factly, and he ushered the lagomorphs inside. The hall was also light blue on the inside, it had a stage on the far wall, and the ceiling was rather high. There were balloons and streamers all around, but the place was empty.

As they entered, Anni quickly hopped over to The J to kiss him hello, but stopped at the last moment, wincing. "What?" he asked.

"Nolan," she replied. He raised an eyebrow and curled his tail, then turned to see that Nolan was indeed approaching the group.

"Hey, chaps!" he hollered. "Rather out-of-the-way place to have a party, ey wot?"

Bekki hopped over to receive him, happy, yet confused. "Nolan? How the (CENSORED) did you know The M's were going to have a party here?"

"The M's?" he asked, as he entered the hall. "Bekki, your _mom_ invited me."

"I did?" asked Babs.

"Yes", replied Mary. "You invited us as well."

"Huh? Wait—I thought _you_ invited _us_!" said the father buck, bewildered. All the rabbits were wincing in confusion.

"Say what?" Babs checked their invitations, then Nolan's. "Strange, all of these invitations are from each other!"

"But at different times," noted Mary. "We were invited at 5, you at 4:30, and Nolan at 5:15."

"Uh—if we were all invited at different times, how is it that we all arrived at the same time?" asked Buck, slowly.

(SLAMSLAMSLAMSLAMSLAMSLAMSLAM!) Every toon jumped when every door and window slammed shut with steel. Many of them screamed as the interior structures folded up on themselves, pulling the decorations in, and leaving them standing on a concrete rectangle next to a steel floor. Then, the steel floor opened, revealing a huge pit of a green foul smelling liquid.

At this, every toon screamed, **_"DIIIIIIIIPP!" _**Some tried to whack open the doors, but they were too thick. Flamethrowers didn't work on them, either. Jackhammers didn't work. Not even machine guns worked.

Then, as a panicked lull came over the toons, a speaker high above them boomed, "Isn't it amazing what you can learn by just observing others? I knew all of you have different notions of punctuality, so I gave each of you a different time to arrive to make sure I had all of you here at the same time!"

"DAKOTA!" spat Anni at the speaker, ears stiff like never before. "GET IN HERE AND FIGHT, YOU COWARD!"

"Oh, no, Anni. Neither you nor your stupid brothers will make my plans fail again. J, you made the stupidest mistake of your life by choosing her." The cub bristled at that. "And now, you will die with your friends and family, and no time machine can help you! No one is coming from the past or future to help you!"

"HA!" replied Junior. "Do you actually think we're going to stay here?" He jumped, grabbed the scenery, and pulled down.

(CRASH!)

And the scenery snapped off its supports and came crashing down on him. Seeing that, The J.A.M. tensed and prepared to warp, hoping to reach the unusually high ceiling and then try to find a way out. Right then, a panel on the wall opened, and a mechanical hand shot out, holding a mallet—

(WHACK!)

—which suddenly smashed on the jaguar's hip, knocking him to a wall. He roared in pain, but before anyone could assist him, more panels opened from the wall, and with no time to dodge them, J, M, Mary, and the Fourteen were also whacked, and essentially rendered warpless. "You know, it's amazing what you can do with a screwdriver and a few well placed blows, don't you think?" Nolan yanked out a cell phone and tried to call for help, but all he heard was static.

They were truly trapped.

"You don't have any escape left, Nolan, so just enjoy your last moments on this planet."

A green buck painfully sat up and cried, "DEE! Don't do this! If you destroy us with dip, the police will know it was you! Everyone KNOWS you hated us!"

"Oh, no, my dear Tex. I already have a plan of neutralising and breaking apart the dip—once all of you dissolve in it—and whatever's left will quietly be dumped in the ocean. And IF someone finds out about this, the paper trail I left behind won't point to me, but to my _father_. Everyone _also_ knows he hates Buster and Babs, AND The J.A.M. and his family…maybe even more than I hated YOU! He will go to jail, and I will take over his businesses, and his estate. I'll _finally_ be able to put my factories where the Looniversity is! And the best thing of all—" she paused, "—is that absolutely none of this will go into my, hee hee, 'permanent record'."

"Huh? What permanent record?" asked Shotsy.

"Oh, I thought you knew about that, rabbit! You see, about a year ago, I had a _very_ interesting—'dream', if you wish to call it that. There, I learned some very interesting things about your religion. Basically, I learned this:" They heard some shuffling, as Dakota pulled out some notes. "I learned that 'if the evil one turns from his evil and does what is lawful and right, gives back what he stole, and is guided by the rules of life, doing no evil, he will certainly live, and will not die. None of the evil that he did will be accounted against him: he has done what is lawful and right, he will certainly live'. Therefore, once I get rid of all of you, and acquire my holdings, I'll join your religion, and essentially start with a clean slate. Nothing I did before will count against me! Isn't that wonderful?"

"YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" screamed Anni, unable to stand.

"THAT'S MANIPULATION!" added Mary. "YOU CAN'T MANIPULATE GRACE OR MERCY!"

"Hey, _I_ didn't make the rules, 'Mary', and by the way, I _know_ that it was you, AND those rabbits, who spoiled my plans. Don't ask me how I know, let's just say that—a little birdie told me, hee hee hee." The African-American and 14 lagomorphs paled and shivered at the Elmyra-like giggle, which dripped with evil. "This time, Mary, there's nothing you can do to stop me, because everything has been set into motion. Once I watch you all die, I'll go cash in on some stock I bought last year. I'll have to thank whoever sent me that 'dream' for letting me see the stock market holdings one year ahead of everyone else! So, like it or not, I _can_ have it both ways. I _can_ have my cake and eat it too. And now, I will watch you all DIE!"

The dip slowly began to rise. In a few minutes, it would overflow and reach the concrete ledge. Quickly, Buster and Babs huddled their youngest seven kits in a corner. Tex painfully stood, and cried, "But Dee! What about our youngest brothers? They haven't done anything to you! The youngest four can't even talk yet! Please, let them go!"

"Now, now, Tex, I thought you were smarter than that. I can't leave anyone behind, no matter how young, to take revenge later on!"

"THEY WON'T!" screamed Buster. "You can have them! You can raise them and make them your employees, servants, sidekicks, ANYTHING! But they don't deserve to die here!"

"Interesting offer, Mister Bunny, but I have a better one. Tex! J!"

"W-what, Dee?"

"Tex, J, I have a proposition for you two: renounce your religion, surrender all your assets, holdings, and properties, whatever they may be, to me, sign a contract to be my exclusive employees, and I'll let you two live. You two are very good business toons, so I'm giving you one last chance to use your talents for me. Do it, and you will live. Refuse, and you will die."

J bristled, laid his ears back, bared his teeth, and puffed up his tail. "I'D RATHER _DIE_ BEFORE RENOUNCING MY BELIEFS!"

"Too bad, J. You had such promise. And what about you, Tex? You're much more of a cream puff than any of the rest. What do you say?"

The green buck lowered his head, and sighed, "I—I'm sorry, Dee. I can't do what you ask. You can ask me for anything you want—but I can't betray Him Who I Wait For, either."

"Too bad. Well, I may have failed twice, but third time's a charm, don't you think? Oh, one more thing: J, since you're going to die, it's a bit irrelevant that you should still keep your real name a secret from me. Do you and your family think you can stop being blockheads for a moment and just tell me all of your real names?"

The cub growled, "I never forgot that oath you made, Dakota. You may curse our names and our beliefs, but we won't give you the satisfaction of getting our names from us!"

"Always the hot-head, just like your girlfriend. Too bad I won't be able to make a pyjama out of your hide now—"

"DAKOTA!"

"You roared, M?"

"Dakota, I don't know how, when, or why, but I can tell you without a doubt that your plan will fail! You can't manipulate your way into the Light! You have to be sincere, and your repentance has to be REAL, with EVIDENCE of it being real! No matter what you say later, or even if a church lets you in, it won't be real, because YOU know it isn't real! This plan of yours won't work! You have to make restitution once you join—how do you plan on making restitution to our families? Or will you lie to them and tell them that your dad did this? You're only deceiving yourself! You won't make it if you hide the truth!" Despite their doom, some still worried more for Dakota's soul than for their own destruction.

"Listen, you freak! I took EVERY precaution to make sure my plan works, AND I added plenty of safety nets for me as well! Did you notice that while I told you my plans, I wasn't actually there with you? No, I'm right outside the door watching you all. And even if by some freak accident or a last-moment rescue _I_ should fall into the dip, it won't affect me. I spent the last year creating my own special mix that will dissolve ANYTOON—unless they have my DNA and aniplasm! Education works wonders, doesn't it! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"

The dip was about to overflow the pit. In desperation, every toon started to empty their pockets, trying to find something to escape, or at least hold off the dip. Nolan tried to use plungers to climb up the wall, but it had a stucco finish, rendering the plungers useless. The M pulled out a grappling hook and threw it at a beam on the high ceiling, but well-placed lasers cut off the hook and shot down the rope. Anni pulled out pistols and lasers of her own, but the laser guns above her were mounted on a ledge, making it impossible to hit them from where she was standing. She could wear down the ledge, but there wasn't enough time to knock out all the lasers. Nothing they threw or shot could get past them. And the walls were too thick to smash a hole or blast them open before the dip reached them. With the dip flowing closer, they took all their pocket contents and formed a rickety barricade between them, trying to hold off the dip as long as they could. That didn't help at all, for when the dip reached the barricade, it slowly began dissolving the objects.

They were trapped.

Painfully, the two families huddled against the right corner; the adults hoisting the children on their shoulders, and the children lifting up the youngest seven as high as they could.

But all knew that it was futile.

At this, an obscure memory flashed through one of The Fourteen. "Oh, no!"

"I know, Buck! We're all going to die!

"Nooo, Chuck! Someone _else_ is going to die! Our other guest is going to be trapped in here as well!"

"What?" asked Babs. "What other guest? Only us, The M's, and Nolan knew about this!"

"Yeeeeeah, but since it was a party, I invited someone who really liked parties!"

Outside, Dakota, again in her lab coat, was standing in front of a podium, where she had a monitor and console that controlled the Hall. When she heard Buck's comment, she raised an eyebrow. "Someone else? Who?" She was so engrossed in the monitor in front of her, and in the screams of terror of her victims, that she didn't hear a rising tone coming from behind her—

—until it was too late.

"BLEPHBTTTBLARGHHTRLPPEPHBTTTBLARGH!"

She turned just in time to see a purple tornado pounce on her and smash her on the front doors. They didn't stop Dizzy, for he burst through the doors, steel and all, and finally wound down to a halt in the middle of the concrete platform. "BLEPHBTTTBLARGHHTRLPPTTPARTYYYYYYY!" The brunette didn't have a chance to scream, as his sudden stop flung her toward the far wall, right above the pit of dip. She smashed on the wall flat on her back, spread eagle, and stayed there for a moment, before starting to peel from the wall.

The families stood there in silent shock. All the ropes and poles they had were being dissolved, so no one could throw anything to save her. Dakota couldn't grab on to anything, and gravity kept peeling her from the wall more and more. But even in this moment, she kept her scowl, and her defiant glance. After all, this particular batch of dip had no effect on her. But just before she lost her hold on the wall, she screamed with all her might:

"YOU'RE A LOUSY KISSER, TEX!"

(SPLASH!)

It was as if she fell into the dip in slow motion, and no one could do anything to save her.

Painfully, they set all the youngsters back on the floor, and stood. Tex limped as near the pit as he dared, hoping against hope that Dakota had been right about the dip.

Then, he saw her hair emerge.

And that was all that emerged from the dip.


	11. Epilogue: Eternity

EPILOGUE - ETERNITY

Tex stood alone in the middle of a field, wearing sackcloth, with ashes on his head and drooped ears.

He felt tired, so _very_ tired.

"Dakota Dee chose the wide and meandering path, the path of darkness, despite multiple warnings, and she received the consequences. She left behind no friends, no descendants, and no one to carry on for her, unless her parents decide to have another child, who will never meet her in person. Dakota Dee has been judged, and sentenced accordingly. And now, no more can be done." The grieving buck pulled out a rose out of nowhere, and laid it in front of a very small headstone. His swollen eyes and worn incisors indicated that he had been there for quite a while. He spoke again, with a choked voice, hindered by heavy sobs, "Dee, it—it didn't have to end this way! Not like this! He refused to put you in a decent plot—and gave you an unmarked grave! I—I didn't—mind—paying for the headstone—sorry it's so small—it's all I could afford—my brothers didn't want to lend me any money—for it—" He shook his head, and covered his eyes, "If you'd only listened—! Now—now _my_ payment for what I felt for you—will continue—for now—and until Kingdom come—I'm so sorry, Dee—!" At that, the green buck turned, and slowly padded away from the stone, with a slight limp. In the distance, under a tree, a young female toon was waiting.

"Will you be okay now, Tex?"

"I—I hope so, Tally, I—I hope I can recover—I have to move on—I hope I have the strength."

She held his arm, "You have your family and friends to help you—and me, too. I'll do what I can, Tex. I don't know what I can do just yet, but I'll figure it out."

With that, both youngsters left the scene, leaving a small headstone proclaim to no one:

DAKOTA DEE DUFF MAXIMILIAN

Loved by only one toon.

1999-2013

They were about to leave, but the green lagomorph stopped: his sensitive ears were picking up an odd sound.

"What?" asked the black feline.

"Um—nothing—I thought I heard a chain just now—I thought someone was repairing a car around here." A silver flash caught his eye, and he saw a dime on the ground. He thought about picking it up, but decided not to, because he didn't need it. With that, the two toons left.

The spirit tugged and tugged, but was unable to free herself. She cursed the buck for being so generous that he left the dime where it was. Her only hope for release from that accursed coin was that somebody, anybody, would travel on this rarely used road, see the dime she had snagged herself on, and pick it up.

That was her punishment, for now, and for eternity: the same punishment for those whose works she did and whose paths she followed…

…proving to Heaven and Hell that she was truly Jacob Marley's Daughter.

THE END / DAS ENDE / DIE EINDE / EINDE / EL FIN / O FIN / LE FIN / IL FINE / SFIRSIT / KONIEC / KONEC / BEIGAS / LOPPU / TELOS / SOF / TAMAT / LIAU LIAU / DANEH O' / WAN-LE / OWARIMASU / SLUTT / SLUT / UXUL


	12. Encore: I Weep for the Souls

ENCORE - I WEEP FOR THE SOULS…

The J stood before the microphone, and Anni was on drums with a microphone in front of her. A.J. stood behind a keyboard rack, Nolan on guitar, and Bekki on bass. Anni marked the time, and the band began a fast rock song, yet it was mellow and sad. After the introduction, J began,

_"Somewhere in the darkest night_

_A stranger has lost the way."_ Dakota walked into a dark alley.

He shivered, _"Cold wind and a distant light_

_Has carried her heart away."_ She looked at him with total hatred.

_"Some say she was one of us."_ A toon? A friend? A Waiting One?

_"A prodigal gone astray_." Due to parental neglect?

J and Anni, _"But inside she's as cold as ice—!"_ More shivers.

J, _"To the truth that she won't obey!"_ Dakota threw the Book into the fire.

_"She won't discern—"_ And watched it burn.

_"The point of no return—in the—"_

All, _"Last daze, the final haze!"_

J, _"There was—strong delusion to believe a lie! In the—"_

All, _"Last daze before the blaze."_

J, _"She couldn't see beyond her misty trance."_ Dakota smiled as she looked at her monitor.

_"To grab the truth and have a fighting chance!"_ Tex knelt before her, weeping.

J looked up, _"In the last daze…"_

All sighed, _"Last daze…"_ She walked away, toward the darkness.

Everyone shuddered, _"**Cold chills** when the Spirit speaks_

J, _"That some shall depart from the Faith."_ Dakota eyed the ghost with contempt.

_"All ends in calamity—!"_ She fell into the pit.

_"Just when she thought it was safe."_ And all looked at her helplessly.

_"She followed the lies."_ She read the biography, and gave an evil smile.

_"The fables men devised—in the—" _

_"Last daze, the final haze!"_ Dakota smiled in her laboratory.

_"There was—strong delusion to believe a lie! In the—"_

_"Last daze before the blaze." _

J looked down, almost weeping. _"She couldn't see beyond their misty trance."_

He clenched his fists in frustration, _"To grab the truth and have a fighting chance!_

_In the last dazeeeeeeee…" _

A.J. and Nolan played a sad solo for a while, as they saw scenes of Dakota rejecting every warning, scoffing at the ghosts, rejecting J, rejecting Tex, rejecting her uncle, rejecting Granny, rejecting her cousins, rejecting Leo and Miranda, and rejecting Montana. She smiled as the Book slowly turned to ashes. After a while, J and Anni shrugged,

_"Some say it's a certainty." _

He opened _his_ Book, _"'A sign of the times', I am told."_

But the others wept, _"Wo——!"_

And he did, too: _"But I weep for the souls of those who will never return to the fold—"_ The ghost trudged on.

The rest echoed in despair, _"Never return to the fold—!"_

J, _"In the—"_

All, _"Last daze, the final haze."_

_"There was—strong delusion to believe a lie! In the—"_

_"Last daze before the blaze."_

_"She couldn't see beyond her misty trance._

_To grab the truth and have a fighting chance! _

_In the last daze…" _

The others replied, _"Last daze…"_

J, _"Last daze!"_

All, _"Last daze…"_

J, _"It's the last daze!"_

All, _"Last daze…"_

J, _"Wo—wo—yeah! Na-na-na-na-na-na-yeah!"_

_"Last daze…"_

_J,"Last daze—! Na-na-na-yeah!"_ The rest echoed as the song and light faded to oblivion,

All, _"Last daze…_

_Last daze…_

_Last daze…"

* * *

_

What, you thought I was going to end it right here? This is a story about choices, and their consequences. What was presented here was the result of one choice. Now, here are the consequences of _another_ choice.


	13. Alt Stave 5: The Last of the Spirits

ALTERNATE STAVE FIVE - THE LAST OF THE SPIRITS (ENDING)

"Is this correct?" she asked him, her eyes now shining with hope, the oppression finally lifting from her heart. "I can start new and help others?"

And for the only time in this visit, the ghost nodded.

For the first time in the entire ordeal, Dakota felt peace, and let out a relieved sigh. She turned once again to him—

But he was gone.

Then, slowly, whatever light there was around her began fading.

Silent terror filled her once again. She screamed, "WAIT! I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all year long! I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future! All three Spirits will be within me! I won't ignore the lessons that they taught me! Is it—is it too late?"

No one was there to listen.

Had it been too late to turn from evil? Should she have acted instead of asking so many questions?

Dakota fell on her hands and knees. The ghost of Christmas Future had left her there, but her thoughts were in total turmoil.

No light.

No sound.

No companion.

Alone.

Not only that, but there was such an oppression over her, such an incredible fear, it reached right to her heart. And she felt it, too: shortness of breath, a horrible pain right in the centre of her chest, unable to cry for help, feeling like she was dying…

Dying…

Alone.

Slowly, she got used to the oppression, but she still felt like she was at the brink of death. She didn't know how long she stayed there, unable to move. Some time later, she turned her head.

Everything in the saloon was still the same.

All this reminded her of a song, and perhaps it was her own mind bringing up the memory to counter the torment of the silence, but in the background, the low strains of a cello sounded, enhanced a light the strumming on a guitar. Dee sighed and stood, feeling the words well up inside her, remembering the song.

It seemed so _right_.

She didn't dare look up, though.

_"I'm standing on a bridge; I'm waiting in the dark._

_I thought that you'd be here—by now."_ Tex always seemed to follow her, even through time.

"_There's nothing but the rain, no footsteps on the ground."_ She remembered the rain of the earlier night…

"_I'm listening but there's no sound."_ Just silence filled with terror.

_"Isn't anyone trying to find me?"_ Her parents?

_"Won't someone come take me home?"_ Her aunts and uncles? Her cousins?

"_It's a **(darn)-cold** night—!"_ She hugged herself, her pyjamas suddenly losing their ability to warm her.

_"Trying to figure **out-this** life!_

_Won't you—take me by the hand—_

_Take me somewhere new?"_ She walked outside.

_"I don't know who you are but I—"_ She realised she really didn't know Tex that well.

_"I'm with you._

_I'm with you, mmmm…"_ She walked the streets of the dilapidated town, shivering in the December wind.

_"I'm looking for a place; I'm searching for a face."_ A green buck's face, actually.

_"Is there anybody here—I know?_

_Cause nothing's going right, and everything's a mess."_ She looked at the saloon, and its broken windows, and the shadows replayed in her mind.

"_And no one likes to be alone."_

_"Isn't anyone trying to find me?_

_Won't someone come take me home?"_ Not even Tex?

_"It's a **(darn)-cold** night—!"_ She yelled at the night.

_"Trying to figure **out-this** life!_

_Won't you—take me by the hand—"_ She reached out to a shadow of Tex, but it faded away.

"_Take me somewhere new?"_ Confusion and terror filled her as the entire town faded away, leaving her alone in the sand and gravel…

_"I don't know who you are but I—"_ Pleading, hoping…

_"I'm with you._

_I'm with you, yeah-yeah."_ Completely alone, Dakota seemed to plead with the very air.

_"Oh! Why is everything so confusing!"_ She glanced around at the dark emptiness.

_"Maybe I'm just out of my mind!"_ And nearly pulled out her own hair in desperation.

"_Yeah yeah-yeah! Yeah-yeah! Yeah-**yeah**! Yeah-**yeah**! YEAAAAAAAAAAAHAA!"_ Finally, she calmed, kneeled, and sang softly.

_"It's a **(darn)-cold** night,_

_Trying to figure **out-this** life._

_Won't you—take me by the hand—"_ Slow tears fell.

_"Take me somewhere new?"_ Suddenly a bright light seemed to shine down on Dakota.

_"I don't know Who You are but I—"_ She looked up, and screamed.

"_I'M WITH YOUUUUUUU! I'M WITH YOUUUUUUU_!" Maybe she wasn't seeking her family.

"_Take me by the hand—take me somewhere new!"_ Or Tex.

"_I don't know Who You are but I—"_ But Someone much more powerful, Who could change all of this.

"_I'M WITH YOUUUUUUU! I'M WITH YOUUUUUUU!"_ The One Who had orchestrated this whole warning.

"_Take me by the hand—take me somewhere new!"_ And she had heeded the warning.

"_I don't know Who You are but I—"_ As the light brightened, Dee sensed a presence, and reached toward it. The human felt the Presence take her hand, and a flood of peace filled her heart.

_"I'm with you,"_ The hand seemed to have a puncture wound in it.

_"I'm with you,"_ She knew perfectly well Who It was.

_"I'm with you,"_ She whispered, as the Light brightened, and faded the scene into whiteness.

"I'm with _you_..." she heard.


	14. Alt Stave 6: Aftershocks

ALTERNATE STAVE SIX - AFTERSHOCKS

The next thing she knew was that the hand that she was holding had turned into her bed curtain, and that she was kneeling in front of one of the bedposts. Glancing around, she saw that her stereo was still there, the bed was intact, the balcony doors were shut, and the fireplace was smouldering slightly. "YES!" she squealed. "It was all real! Everything's still here! I still have time to change things!" Still kneeling, she repeated to the ceiling, "I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all year long! I won't ignore the lessons that they taught me! AND I WON'T DIE! YAY!" Then, like the proper toon she was, she began bouncing all over the room a-la Daffy Duck, with the required, "WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO!" that normally accompanied such celebration. She twirled around a bedpost, squealing, "Whoo! I'm light as a feather! I have no idea what to do now!" She crawled under the covers just for the fun of it, "I have no idea what I'm doing! I'm as giddy as a schoolgirl—!" Suddenly she popped out of the covers, "What am I saying? I AM a schoolgirl!"

She jumped out of the bed and continued bouncing in the morning light. As she did, she took a closer look at the various parts of her room. The floor from where Howard Hughes entered, the fireplace, the recliner, the balcony doors, the clock on top of the door—

She did a double take, and stared at the date. That couldn't be right! Well, she didn't actually care if it was correct or not, because today was the first day of the rest of her life, and she intended to use it to start making up for all the wrongs she had committed. But she HAD to know. With a swift kick, the balcony doors burst open and she stepped out into the sunlight—the _sunlight_! Not the cold night or bitter darkness of a desert! THE DAYTIME! But still, she couldn't bring herself to trust her clock. Then, something in the distance caught her eye. There was someone walking in front of the mansion, perhaps a morning jogger—

With a very toony zoom, she dashed out of her room, down the hall, down the stairs, out the main doors, through the front yard, burst through the main gate, and stopped only to grab the toon from the front of his Hound's-tooth trench coat while planting her feet on his torso. "YOU!"

The adult male albino rat was scared out of his depression by this young pyjama-clad humanmaid suddenly grabbing him. "Wha—?"

"What day is it!" demanded the crazy teenager.

The rat just looked at her, grinding his teeth in confusion. "Wot? What'ya mean what day is it?" And to top it all off, he had a British accent!

"Yes! I need to know what day is today!"

"Whoi, it's Christmas Day, lass. And Oi'd like to add, that's hardly a way to treat an adult, don't you know?"

Suddenly she realised just how she was holding him. "Oh, right." With a sheepish grin, she released him and dropped to the snow. Her bare feet, in contrast to the rat's Wellingtons, stiffened under the chill of the snow, sending shivers all over her, but they were _good_ shivers, because they told the teenager that the snow was real. She shifted around rather sheepishly. "Sorry, but you wouldn't believe the night I had!" She hugged herself, partly because of her joy, and partly because the low temperature was starting to get to her.

The male adjusted his blue scarf, "Say, lass, shouldn't you have a sweater on, at least?" He was getting concerned more for this child's mental status, though.

"NO!" she blurted, smiling, frolicking about, "The cold—the cold is REAL! I can feel it, at last! The snow is real! It's not a dream or a vision or a shadow! I've never felt like this before! I finally feel the world!" Her own modesty prevented her from frolicking naked in a world she seemed to step into for the first time in her life. Suddenly she stopped frolicking and turned to the rodent, "Wait, did you say it's Christmas Day?"

"Aye."

"It's Christmas Day—for real!"

"Aye, it is. Whoi do you ask?"

She shivered, and her voice trembled a trifle, "Bad night, like I said…" Then, she realised something, "Wow…they did it in one night…"

"Huh? Who did what?"

Suddenly the brunette grabbed his paw and proceeded to dance around the sidewalk, with the bewildered albino rat in tow. "They did it in one night! They did it in one night! THEY DID IT IN ONE NIGHT! I HAVEN'T MISSED IT!" Bouncing again, she repeated, "I'm lighter than air! I have no idea what I'm doing! I'm as giddy as a schoolgirl—!" Suddenly she stopped and did a face palm, "Ugh, I said it again! I AM a schoolgirl! BUT WHO CARES! WOO HOO!"

"Yes, and I'm married with a very jealous wife, so please unhand me!" demanded the adult.

"Sorry!" she yelped as she released him. "I'll buy you a car for your trouble! MERRY CHRISTMAS TO THE WORLD!"

Now the rodent was pondering seriously that there was something wrong with the child. But first thing was first, "Uh, that's all well and good, lass, but you're going to get frostbit if you keep goin' like you are presently."

The humanmaid stopped and saw that she was still clad in her silk pyjamas. "Oh, silly me, I forgot to get dressed just now—" It was here where she noticed that something _else_ was amiss. "Hold it—we're in California. Why are you talking with a British accent?"

"Because Oi'm from Britain, wot. Oi moved here with my family a whoile back."

Here, something clicked. "You're—British—British—British—" She shuffled in the snow, shivering and trying to remember. "British—I remember Daddy talking about a British family that moved here a while back—they were—they were—" She looked up at him, "Say, your last name wouldn't happen to be C-C-C-C-Carrotte?" Her jaw was now twitching involuntarily.

Now seriously concerned, he picked her up and held her close, brushing the snow off her feet. "Yes, it is, whoi do you ask?"

"C-C-C-C-Carrotte—say, isn't there someone in your family who's having p-p-p-problems with a baby or something?"

He rubbed warmth into her shoulders, "Yes, my soon-to-be niece is having problems. There's been a charity drive, but it hasn't helped much. Oi don't know how much money we've thrown at this thing, but it looks like all the bloody money in the bloody world won't help with so bloody little information there is to work with." He sighed as the brunette suddenly felt the bite of the cold, though she appeared to be deep in thought. "It was a real blow to all of the family that so many problems started out so soon, blast it that it had to happen at Christmas time! We all love Leo and Miranda; we stayed with them in the hospital for so long that none of us had the time to prepare a proper Christmas dinner, wot—and we're chefs, of all people! Blast it, Oi would gladly give up dinner for the rest of my life if it would help Miranda and her baby. The hospital got a bit gloomy so Oi had to get out and walk even for a mmmmMMMPHH—!"

"I c-c-c-can help her!" she stuttered, clamping his jaw shut.

"Hhhwhh?"

"I c-c-c-can help her!" she repeated. "I c-c-c-can help them—and YOU! Gosh, no wonder you had a face as long as a horse just now! Come! I n-n-n-need you to come inside!" She squirmed out of his grasp, jumped down, and grabbed his paw again, dragging him back into the mansion as quickly as she could.

"But—lass! My family's waitin' for me!"

"Call them and tell them you'll be there in a bit! I need to give you something!"

Here, the rat noticed something, "Hey, wait! Isn't this Montana's mansion? Oi don't think Oi'm allowed in here!"

"YOU HAVE _MY_ PERMISSION! NOW COME ON!"

Once back inside, the cold slowly lost its grip on the humanmaid. Dakota dragged the adult up to her office, and she ran to her desk. There, he looked in wonder as she pulled out several file chips (they replaced the DVD-ROM a while back) as well as some stacks of folders, notebooks, and note pads. Not knowing how to present them to him, she grabbed the first thing she found: an expensive suitcase, stuffed the information in it, and handed it to the murid.

"That will help your niece—wait, I forgot something." She was giggling, for some reason. Taking another briefcase, she ran to her closet, opened a safe, and began stuffing it with money, not bothering to count it. "All of this—hee hee!—is for all the doctors to use the info as best as they can—hee hee!" She shoved the suitcase at him as well. Both suitcases were huge and bulky, and the male was barely able to hold them steady. "Oh, but wait, you can't carry all this by yourself all the way back to the hospital!"

"Well, no Oi can't, but—"

She jumped to her desk and turned on the intercom. "Get my helicopter ready to leave for Acme General NOW! This is an emergency—hee hee!—AND I'M SERIOUS!" The rat stiffened when he realised that the youngster's giggling sounded eerily similar to Elmyra's. "Oh, by the way—hee hee!—I'm handing the deed of ownership to the hospital as well—hee hee!—they can put the helicopter to better use than I can—hee hee hee hee!—if you want to work for them, it's fine with me! I'll give you the best severance package you've ever laid your eyes on! HA HA HA HA HA HA!" She turned to the adult, pushing him away, "The heliport is on the roof—just take the elevator down the hall—HA HA HA!—wait, did you say you didn't prepare dinner? Don't worry—HA HA HA HA HA!—I'll take care of that, too! NOW GO! YOUR NIECE NEEDS YOU! AND YOU CAN KEEP THE SUITCASES!" She practically shoved him out the door, slammed it shut, and bounced back to her desk to order the best and biggest dinner from the most exclusive—

No.

But then, she proceeded anyway, and dialled a number. "Hello? Club Swank? I call now because I was _about_ to place an order for the BIGGEST Christmas dinner you could come up with, with money being no object, BUT I'M NOT GOING TO ORDER IT ANYMORE! HA! And do you know why? BECAUSE YOU DON'T NEED THE MONEY! No, I'm going to give someone else the chance to do something much BIGGER than you could ever come up with! MERRY CHRISTMAS!" She slammed her phone down, and grabbed the phone book. There, she looked up the name of the grocery store that she saw with Christmas Present, looked up all the delis and diners in that area, and made a few phone calls. Acme General was going to have a feast it would never forget! She had quite a problem getting people to take her seriously because she was giggling so much, and then the giggling turned to an uncontrollable guffaw, so uncontrollable that after she made the last phone call she dropped to the floor, rolling, sweating, and laughing like never before in her life.

She didn't know for how long she laughed, but at last, she got up, needing to do more. She dashed out of her room, but stopped when she came up to the portraits. For some reason, they looked brighter, more handsome even, especially one in particular. "Thank you, Mister Hughes, for the warning. I'll never forget you—and I hope a bit of your punishment has been removed, as it happened with Ebenezer Scrooge and Jacob Marley." She blew the portrait a kiss, and went on her way.

* * *

Elmyra was wearing her blue nightgown and was sitting in front of the vanity mirror in the master bedroom, brushing her hair—

"OOF!"

—and then she was on the floor with her daughter hugging her like never before.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS, MOM!"

"Wh-what? Dee? What's going on?" She wondered why her daughter was practically matted with sweat.

"I'M HAPPY, THAT'S WHAT'S GOING ON!" Dakota looked around, and suddenly asked worriedly, "Where's Dad?"

The adult sighed, "I'm afraid your father decided to go to Aspen after all. He said it was business, but now I'm starting to doubt that."

Dakota helped her mother get up. "Um, Mom?"

"Yes, Dee?"

"Are you still going to Uncle Duncan's party tonight?"

"Why, of course I am, Dee! Your Uncle Duncan always prepares the best parties ever!"

Sheepishly, and even slightly ashamed, the youngster asked, "Um—can I come too?"

For a moment, Elmyra wondered if this was her real daughter. "You—you want to come?"

"Y-yes. I—I know I've been very rude to all your—our—relatives—I think it's time I changed that—too bad Daddy won't be there."

Elmyra caressed her daughter's real sweat-drenched hair. "I'm glad you changed your mind, Dee. It will be a big surprise for your Uncle Duncan!"

Dakota smiled, her face shining—and now, tears glistened. "Mom?"

"Yes?"

"Th—thanks for having me—and not giving up on me—" Her voice choked up as she hugged her mother like never before, weeping with joy and repentance, making Elmyra happily confused.

* * *

Later, Dakota Dee was now properly dressed for winter, almost. She had a long light blue coat, but donned blue jeans and white sneakers. She ran from her mansion, needing to find several people immediately. As she looked for them, she couldn't help but take in the beauty of the snow in the city. Even the dirty sloshes on the street seemed beautiful to her; it was as if she was looking at everything for the first time—

She suddenly jumped from the sidewalk onto the driver side door of a blue 1958 Nash Metropolitan. "GRANNY!"

The ancient toon yelped and slammed the brakes, making the car skid to a stop on the crunched snow below it. Gasping and holding her chest, she scolded, "CHILD! What are you trying to do? Give me a heart attack and finish off what you started last night?"

Sheepishly again, the repentant toon replied, "Oh, yeah, about that, Granny—please consider yesterday's outburst—as a horrible thing for me to say about this day—and please forgive the actions of a spoiled girl."

Granny didn't know what to make of that, but the child seemed sincere to her. "This is—very sudden, Dee, considering what you said—and did—last night. Why the sudden change of heart?"

The child shook her head. "It's—a long story—a VERY long story—and I had a VERY long night—are you still taking donations for the fund of the Carrotte's baby?"

"Yes, I am," she replied suspiciously, adjusting her glasses.

"Oh, good! I'm glad you didn't give up. The baby's uncle will soon contact you about a donation that was made this morning—I hope it's enough—and if it isn't—" She didn't know what else to do except pull out bags and bags of money and throw them in the back seat.

"Dee? What—?"

She was giggling again. "I—hee hee!—hope this helps out—hee hee!—and I'm throwing in for what I—and my dad—didn't give before—hee hee!—you know the charities better than I do, Granny—hee hee!—I know you'll know how to handle all this!"

"Dee, are you serious? Do your parents know about this?" The elder looked worriedly as bag after bag kept piling in.

"Yes! And it's MY money! I can do whatever I want with it! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" She threw the last bag in, and reached inside to hug Granny as best as she could. "Merry Christmas, Granny! And happy new year!"

She kissed the elder's cheek, and with that, the teenager jumped to the street and ran, slipping a bit on the packed snow, powered by her new joy. "Uh—Merry Christmas, Dee!" was all that Granny could say now.

* * *

Tex, with his thick black coat, emerged from the tree stump, and looked up. It was a sunny morning, with the forest glowing with light reflected from the snow. He slowly trudged away from the stump, head and ears down, and teeth grinding loudly. His puffy and bloodshot eyes indicated that he had a long night of weeping. Tonight there would be a bazillion rabbits here for the Christmas party, and he needed some time alone to recover before his relatives arrived. He shuddered suddenly, partly because of the cold, and partly because of unspeakable grief. It was as if Dakota had died—

"TEX BUNNY!"

The shout made him jump ten metres into the air. When he came back down, he saw Dakota Dee standing in front of him, with the most fearsome scowl he had ever seen on her. "D-Dee?"

"Tex, WHAT is the meaning of you NOT showing up for work today!" she growled, fists at her sides.

With his ears diagonally down in fright, he chattered, "Wh-what? Dee—you know perfectly well why, _two_ reasons, actually! One: it's Christmas, an _official_ holiday, and two: I—I quit, remember?"

"Oh? And did you think I was just going to STAND there and watch your tail leave my office?"

"Uh—didn't you?"

"I'm not going to stand for this anymore, Tex. With or without you, I'm going to make changes around here! And I'm talking RADICAL CHANGES!"

She was leaning into his face, making him lean back. Slowly, he reached behind him, preparing to brandish a mallet. "D-Dee, what are you talking about? I can't help you anymore!"

"'HELP'?" she blurted, as if she had been asked for a weasel. "Oh, my dear Tex, help me YOU WILL! And do you know WHY!"

He firmly held the mallet handle. "W-why?"

"Because you're RE-HIRED!"

Both stood there, completely still, despite the uncomfortable position they were in. Something didn't seem to register with Tex. "I'm _what_?"

"You heard me! You're hired again! Complete with vacation, bonuses, back pay, and a raise! And what's more, I'm making you my PARTNER! I may have lost The J, but I'm NOT going to lose YOU!" She poked his chest, "Is—that—CLEAR!" The buck was about to ask her something, but she couldn't keep her scowl any longer and she just clung to him, laughing like never before. He didn't know what else to do but embrace her too, though soon he had to hold her tight to keep her upright because she was laughing incredibly hard—

—a _genuine_ laugh, caused by happiness, not evil.

After a while, she calmed down, and the lagomorph was finally able to ask, "Dee—are you all right?" She only nodded, smiling at him. "Are—are you serious? What's going on? Why are you acting like this?"

"S-sorry, Tex! But now I know why Scrooge did that to Bob Cratchit! The look on your face was _priceless_!"

He winced, but raised his ears. "What? Scrooge? Bob Cratchit? Dee, what are you talking about?"

The brunette held him closer, "Tex—something—incredible happened to me last night—I don't know how to explain this—or maybe—this will sound familiar." She stood back, sighed, and sang softly,

_"And it's not a cry you can hear at night,_

_It's not somebody who's seen the Light!_

_It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah!"_ Tex's jaw thudded on the snow.

"_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Hallelujah,_

_Halleluuuuuuuujaaah."_

Dakota chuckled at the dumbfounded look on Tex's face. "It's _quite_ the long story, Texie—"

_Texie?_

"—If you've ever read Dickens you'd have an _inkling_ of what happened to me, in the space of one night." She sighed, exhausted, and repeated, "I promise, dear Tex, to honour Christmas, and East—erm—Passover—and why not, Hanukkah—in my heart. Not just during the season but throughout the year. I won't forget the lessons given to me by the past, present, and future I've been shown."

Dickens? Past? Present? Future? "W—wha—you mean—all that—happened to you—?"

She nodded. "Yes, Texie, I was Scrooged. And—I chose the path you're walking. I chose to follow, not to lead. I—I chose the Light, Texie." The green lapine in front of him didn't know what to think.

"That—that—explains last night—"

"I know. It was the longest night I've ever—"

"No," he held her arm. "Last night, we said our prayers before bed, but for some reason, I kept at it. My brothers went to bed right then, but I couldn't stop. I didn't know what was going on, but I prayed like never before—I thought it was because of the Carrotte's baby—but everything kept coming back to _you_. I didn't know what was the deal with you, but everything just flowed out of me— I was fighting a battle I didn't know—I never felt such urgency or despair—I nearly ground my teeth to nothing! When everything finally stopped at 6 a.m.—I felt—as if you had died."

"It was you…" she whispered. She caressed some of his matted facial fur, "It was _you_ who kept it up! Texie, thank you!" She hugged him _very_ tightly now, nearly squeezing the wind out of him. She had inherited her mother's arms, he deduced. "Just so you know—yes, I felt like I died—but then—I felt alive again, Texie. I've never felt like this before, though. Everything just looks so—so new! Even you! I feel like I'm a newborn baby! And—and because everything _is_ sorta new for me—I need help. My straight and narrow path seems to have quite a few bumps and potholes—due to my neglect. I—I need you to help me." She let go of him and held her hands behind her, blushing furiously now, and fidgeting on the snow. "Well—actually—I just, sorta, need _you_, period. I—I've realized how you feel—about me—and—and—I—I think I feel the same."

Suddenly, it all came down to the male. "Huh? You mean—you—you———?"

The female took a deep breath, gently held his paws, and looked earnestly at him, "I—I love you, Tex."

For a long moment, the leporid looked into her eyes, searching for any hint of deception, because during his time as her sidekick he had trained himself to spot them.

After a while, he realised he was finding none.

And finally, it hit him that she was telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

Therefore, he reacted accordingly:

The buck smiled like never before, and suddenly began jumping randomly all around his beloved, screaming, "YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY! WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO!"

The humanmaid laughed again, "Texie, you look like a superball!"

"AND I FEEL LIKE ONE TOO! MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ME!"

She giggled, "Merry Christmas to Texie!"

Suddenly, he stopped in front of her, and put his arms around her. "And—merry Christmas to you, my love."

She smiled and returned the embrace. She had hugged others before, but this time, it was quite different. "I could get used to this," she commented about this new feeling.

Happy tears flowed from him. "Dee—you—you don't know—how long—I've—I've—————asked————————for—————————" Softly, human and rabbit connected at the lips.

_Oh, I could DEFINITELY get used to this,_ thought the female, now getting quite thoroughly lost in the kiss as it deepened. After a while, the brunette pulled back, and took a few steps back. She just stood there, gazing at him for the longest.

"Dee?" he asked, wincing a bit.

She seemed to have problems speaking, though she looked like she had something very important to say. "There—there was a future—" she began. The humanmaid took a deep breath, "There was a shadow of the future—that—that I saw."

The male then caught her sense of dread. "What—what did you see?"

The female looked at the distance. "I saw the Carrottes in mourning, because their baby was lost—also—my father in mourning, but auctioning off all my stuff—I don't know how it happened—but—but it was—" She whispered so only he could hear, "Dip."

The buck paled when he heard that word. "Oh—my—but—but—you stopped it, didn't you? You changed the future now, right? Since you changed your ways, you—you changed everything else that will happen, right?"

"I—I hope so—you see—I—I saw you, too."

His right ear fell. "Oh—I—I wasn't dead—was I?"

The Caucasian wrapped her arms around herself, gazing off into the distance, as she remembered, "No, Tex. You were in mourning, too."

"I certainly would be—if I lost _you_," he smiled weakly.

She turned to him, "That was something I kept asking myself, Texie. _Why_ did you mourn me, when the world did not? _What_ had I done to deserve your tears? Even after you had chosen to move on, and found—somebody else—I was still in your head."

The blue buck pondered on that, then he held her hands and gave his answer, "Because—maybe I was the only one who saw a bit of good in you, or at least a _potential_ of good—even when everyone else gave up hope—maybe what I did last night was keep that dying ember of good from extinguishing forever—and maybe—because I love you for no reason at all."

The female freed a hand to rub her eyes. Her voice was starting to choke, "You must have some super powered eyes, Texie, I guess it comes from all those carrots you eat, because I had that bit hidden pretty deep, you know."

Leaning his ears toward her, he wiped her eyes, "And you opened up and let it rise to a flame. Now everyone will see it too."

The girl whispered, "I didn't want to be alone—I guess nobody does—but—I finally saw you for what you are. Your kindness, consideration, and goodness—" she gently caressed Tex's cheek fur. "I was such a fool..."

"But now you've changed. You won't be a fool anymore. You won't be alone anymore. We'll be together, now and forever." He rubbed his chin on her hand, and then he embraced her.

As they moved closer, she whispered, "Forever…" and kissed again.

Both were so lost that they didn't notice another toon approach the stump and ring the doorbell. An orange doe with a black jacket and black pants emerged to greet her boyfriend, a rat-cat hybrid, who wore a red jacket with matching pants. Bekki kissed Nolan, "Good morning, love. How's your aunt?"

He helped her out of the stump. The kiss had made him smile briefly, but his face, whiskers, ears, and tail lowered as he replied, "No changes, but at least she's not getting worse than she was last night. Oi'll be going to the hospital later today."

Her ears lowered too. "(CENSORED), I can't imagine how things must be for your family right now. But do you (CENSORED) think that maybe later on you and A.J. will join the rest of us? We're (CENSORED) going sledding, all my brothers and sisters, and J's cousins, too."

The carnivore-rodent smiled slightly, showing his canines and incisors. "Oi think Oi can make it—huh?" Something in the distance caught his eye, making him grind his teeth in confusion. He looked behind her and asked, "Say, ain't that Dakota and Tex?"

The lagomorph turned, and looked at the couple in question, wincing. "Well, either it's them—or someone just (CENSORED) broke the record of the most (CENSORED) lawn ornament—" She took a closer look, ears stiffening behind her. "—OR THAT (CENSORED) IS EATING MY BROTHER ALIVE!"

Now Nolan took a closer look, and couldn't help but ask, "What the (CENSORED)?" Then, with a chuckle, he added, "Heh, looks rather mutual to me, luv." Bekki just tensed and was about to warp—

—when the felid-murid grabbed her arm, stopping her. Before she could launch a barrage of curses at him, he asked, "Wait a mo. Why isn't Tex struggling to get away, if she was eating him? Actually the whole scene looks strangely—mutual."

The irate leporid spat, "MUTUAL? Please, it's (CENSORED) not as if the both of them are—" looks closer, wincing, "—hugging—and—Tex is (CENSORED) leaning her over? What the (CENSORED) is going on?"

"Oi don't know, but it _looks_ like Tex got his wish from last night—but how?"

"That's what _I_ would (CENSORED) like to know!"

Thinking a bit more, her boyfriend suggested, "Well, it _looks_ like she 'ad a change o' heart, maybe."

"That, or a (CENSORED) lobotomy, complete with a (CENSORED) tonsil exam!"

"Do you think we should investigate?"

She spat, ears stiff behind her. "Don't see why the (CENSORED) not, after all, he _is_ my brother, and she just happens to be a (CENSORED) who wants to kill us all." She stomped toward the kissing couple.

Her boyfriend padded beside her, curious about the whole thing, but then feeling bemused, "Is it just me, or is the snow below them melting?"

Tex was completely lost in the sensation of the kiss, now that it was being returned. Dakota, meanwhile, had never felt like this in her life. For a moment, she forgot all about the snow, the cold, the visitation, and could only feel his fur pressed against her face, and his furry body against her own, and the warm glow of pure joy that was coming from her heart. Bekki, however, was determined to put a stop to all that, knowing what her boyfriend had gone through because of the humanmaid. Nolan, on the other paw, was in a fix. He was unsure if he should stop his girlfriend.

Tex and Dakota were suddenly yanked out of their romantic trance when a furious orange doe yanked them apart. "WHAT THE (CENSORED) IS GOING ON? TEX, HAVE YOU GONE (CENSORED)?"

Dakota stumbled backward, falling into the snow. She looked up to find a very irate Rebecca Bunny staring down at her. "Oh shrimp…"

The green buck suddenly blocked the brunette's view of his sister, also with stiff ears. "It's called True Love, sis! And believe it or not, it found its way to Dee! She repented! She's no longer a villain!"

The hybrid beside the doe ground his teeth, "No longer a villain? True love? Dakota experiencing true love? Tex, that sounds rather the oxymoron to me."

The buck glared at his sister and her boyfriend, but his sister spat first, "And you actually (CENSORED) believe her? Please, Tex, what the (CENSORED) did she do to your brain? Did you forget every (CENSORED) thing she's done to J, to us, and to YOU!"

"Hey, you don't know what happened to her last night, Bekki!" he spat back

"Nor do you, Texie," said the humanmaid, sadly. "I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't believe me. Many didn't believe me just now, before I got here."

"'Texie'?" Nolan asked, curling his tail and grinding his teeth again.

Dakota stood, with Tex's help. "What?" she laughed. "You don't use a pet name with Bekki?"

"Not if Oi wish to live a long and healthy life," replied the hybrid. "Bekki can call me 'Lan', though, but she's about as bad as Auntie Miranda."

She flashed a grin at Bekki. "I prefer to be called 'Dee'."

"Very well. So what the (CENSORED) _did_ happen to you?"

The Caucasian lowered her head, "It's a long story, guys—ever read 'A Christmas Carol'? The same story your family plays out, and where your sister might be playing Tiny Tim this year?"

Nolan stood back at that. Before he could ask how she got that information, his girlfriend eyed the humanmaid incredulously and asked, "So, you're (CENSORED) saying that you got the Scrooge treatment last night?"

She sighed, and nodded. "Yes, I did. It's not something I'd recommend to anybody, by the way. What I went through last night—was the scariest—most horrible—flashbacks—and flash-forwards—I've ever got———Bekki—I know this is hard for you to believe, but I saw the Light—and I received it."

Here, the rat-cat became sceptical, especially after what she said about Talleen. "Oh? What are you going to do to prove it, ay wot? Donate to Uncle Leo and Aunt Miranda's health fund?"

"Well, sure, but could you pick something I haven't done already?" Now it was Nolan's turn to have his jaw thud on the snow.

Tex winced, "What? Did you give the hospital all the info of the research you did?"

"Yes, every last bit of it. And my personal helicopter, too. The hospital needs it more than I do." The two rabbits' jaws thudded on the snow now. "Heh, I guess that would be surprising for all of you, considering what I've done before."

Suddenly, Bekki's jaw reset itself. She stomped in front of Dakota and leaned into her face, poking her chest, "Okay, so maybe you've done a few (CENSORED) publicity stunts—"

"PUBLICITY STUNTS!" Dee uttered in pure disbelief. "Bekki Bunny, if this was a publicity stunt, would I be here, instead of at a press conference? Where are the brass bands, the paid-to-be adoring crowds, the news media, and ticker tape?" Now _she_ spoke with a slight English accent, brought about by her formative years spent in England. "Why am I not on television and demonstrating my 'benevolence' to the multitudes?" The four toons stood silent for a while. "Do you want to know why, Bekki?" she asked, still with that slight British accent. "It is because I intend to eschew fame, not seek it. It is one thing to be a philanthropist, it's quite another to use philanthropy to bolster one's ego, and image."

"Oh really?" Bekki shot back, unwilling to let this little (CENSORED) get the best of her. "What would you (CENSORED) say if I got ANNI and THE J here to do a (CENSORED) cross-examination on you? What if I (CENSORED) get the rest of my brothers and sisters, A.J. and The M here as well, (CENSORED) it?"

With her anger spent, she lowered her head, "I—I'd submit to whatever Anni and J would want to do to me—I—I know I probably deserve it ten times over—J—J would be justified if he mauled me from now till Kingdom come." She sighed, and shoved her hands into her coat pockets. It was then that Bekki realized that Dakota was not in her usual attire. There was no fur, or even faux fur, on the coat. It was a higher end coat, but not exactly a status symbol. It also looked like the human was wearing jeans and plain old sneakers as well, as she had apparently dressed hastily this morning. And knowing her, the evil toon would not be caught dead without fashion clothes that even made Shotsy jealous. She was about to throw another inquisition, but there was something about Dakota that Bekki could not deny. Despite her rather run-down appearance, Dakota's face—

Appeared _brighter_.

Gone was her father's inherited scowl. Gone was the sneer that usually graced her lips when talking to them. Her face showed concern, and that expression did not look the slightest bit foreign. And perhaps it was Bekki's imagination, but there was the slightest hint of loving dopiness that obviously came from Elmyra.

Finally, it hit her. "Whoa—you mean—this is (CENSORED) real?"

"I came by to tell Texie about my conversion—and to ask him where I could get another copy of a certain Book," she replied with a slight bit of self-depreciation.

"Another?"

"Y—yes—the one you gave me—um—I kinda—got rid of it."

"Oh, okay! No problem, Dee, here, I have another cop—" He was about to pull out another Book, but she stopped him.

"No, Texie. This time—I—I need to _buy_ it. I won't take something that doesn't cost me anything now, especially not when I destroyed the Book."

He took out another Book anyway. "All the bookstores are closed today, luv, so you can have this one until tomorrow."

"Thanks, Texie," replied the humanmaid with a smile, taking the Book and clutching it like plush doll.

At this, the British-American asked his girlfriend, "Well, luv, does Dakota's conversion seem real enough for you now?"

The toon in question flashed a grin at them, "Please, I'd—I'd like to be called 'Dee' now."

"That's going to be a (CENSORED) problem for most of us, Dak—erm—Dee. We're a bit (CENSORED) used to calling you by your first name."

The brunette shrugged. "I'm sure it'll catch on eventually. It sounds better than 'Dakota', to be honest. Say, Bekki? Would you and your sibs like to help me clean out my room? I'm going to be donating a lot of stuff to charity, and I really don't want to interfere with the domestics' Christmas vacation. I might be able to get my cousins, too—"

(TRIPLE THUD)

"WHAT?" she asked perplexed.

Her new boyfriend reset his jaw, "Um—let's just say that you're pulling off one miracle after another, luv, but I doubt your dad will let us in the mansion."

She lowered her head again, "Daddy's off in Aspen, and by the time he gets back he's going to know all that I'm doing—and I know his reactions are going to be—less than pleasant. I might have to hang out at my own place for a while."

Bekki finally straightened her ears, convinced that the humanmaid was telling the truth. "Um—well—you certainly (CENSORED) surprised us, and proved to us that this is real, and it's (CENSORED) possible the rest of the teams will believe you as well—but considering all that's (CENSORED) happened, you're going to have a (CENSORED) of a time getting J and his family to (CENSORED) believe you."

The "new" humanmaid sighed again, and looked at the sky. "I know. I don't think Anni will believe me, or _want_ to believe me, either. But extend the invite anyway, okay, Bekki? Daddy will be away until after New Years, so we don't have to get rid of everything in one night—hee hee—I may even end up donating to Shotsy's wardrobe!"

The green buck held her shoulders, and soothed, "We'll tie Anni down if we need to, Dee. And if you need more help, perhaps we can get A.J., too."

She held his paws, "That's great, Texie." They stood like this for a moment, and then she straightened up and gave a deep sigh. "Okay, I patched things up here, almost. Now to work up the courage to apologise to J and his family." She was about to walk away, toward the M Lair, but her boyfriend stopped her.

"Um, I don't think it's a good idea to do that today, luv. His whole family is visiting from Mexico, and I don't think you want to surround yourself with jaguars who know that you've tried to kill one of their own."

For the first time since last night, the Caucasian paled and gulped. "Uh, yeah. Very good point, Texie. I guess I still need to work on my timing."

"That's why I'm here to help you, luv," he replied, gently grinding his teeth and leaning his ears toward her.

His sister thought for a moment, and decided, "We'll sort of try to (CENSORED) break the news to them first, and then give you the (CENSORED) green light when they're ready to receive you."

"I just hope they believe you," shuddered the humanmaid.

"They're more likely to believe us than you, luv. If we can get Anni to accept you, J will be a lot easier."

"It'll be a start." She sighed again, looking contentedly at the three furries. "It will be nice to have actual friends…"

Tex held her shoulders, "And a _boyfriend_." She grinned at him, remembering that _kiss_.

That look in their eyes signalled the other couple to make a strategic retreat. "Well, I (CENSORED) guess we'll leave you two alone. Come on, Lan, let's go tell the (CENSORED) news to Anni and the teams."

However, Dakota explained, "I'd better leave, actually. I've got some other things to take care of, before I can go home and start packing. I really shouldn't take Texie away from his family."

Nolan chuckled, "Oh boy. This is going to be a lot of fun, to be honest!"

The green buck smiled, "You do what you need to do, luv," he kissed her cheek, "and we'll be waiting for you later. Merry Christmas." Dakota hugged Tex, and then waved to Nolan and Bekki, before she skipped off to do whatever other good deeds she had planned for the day.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!"

* * *

"Dee, come on! You said you wanted to come!" scolded Elmyra.

The teenager in question was dragged back to the door for the _nth_ time. "Oh, Mom, I'm so nervous! I—I don't know if I should be here! I mean—I _want_ to be here—but do _they_ want me here?"

"Young lady, if _they_ say they don't want you here, we'll fly to Aspen and celebrate with your father, okay?"

"O—okay."

"Now, I didn't tell your uncle you were coming, but he _did_ invite you, so I'm sure he'll have a HUGE surprise!" She rang the doorbell, but to Dakota it sounded like a funeral dirge.

Duncan opened the door. "Ah, glad you could make it, sis! Please, com—" His jaw would have dropped to the ground if he had received more toony training. "Dee?" he asked incredulously.

At the sound of her name, all chatting and music and every single noise within his house suddenly ceased. Slowly, all of her relatives walked to the door to see if the Prodigal Daughter/Granddaughter/Niece/Cousin had actually returned.

"Hi, Uncle Duncan," she said sheepishly, almost trying to hide behind her mother. "I—I changed my mind—and decided to accept your offer this year—I—I hope you have room in there for me—and I hope—that you can forgive this spoiled girl for insulting you and Christmas like I did last night—I—I'm sorry for what I said, Uncle Duncan—please forgive me—and the rest of you, please forgive me—for neglecting—WHOA!"

She didn't get to finish her request, because suddenly her uncle picked her up and carried her on his shoulders, parading her all over the living room. All her relatives cheered and clapped, all wanting to hug her, mess her hair, and even give her a noogy. When at last he put her down, one of Duncan's daughters asked, "So, Cousin, what brings you to this neck of the woods to spend time with the peasants?"

The brunette replied, "Oh, I don't know, maybe I decided I've been—a brat—long enough—maybe because I finally saw the light—maybe because I need to appreciate family more—and maybe because if you want to draw a sketch of me you MIGHT want to see me so you can know what you're doing!" Naturally, the "Artist" didn't know what Dakota was talking about, and didn't care, either, because both were caught up in an embrace a moment later.

It was a Christmas celebration that family would not forget, because their Prodigal finally came home, naturally, but this Prodigal didn't return empty-handed. That night, a WE-haul truck stopped by the Duff house to drop quite a few Christmas gifts.

There was a twinge of regret, though, right when Duncan finally gave Dakota the gifts that had backed up over the years. There were many she didn't need anymore, like a tricycle, but she assured him that it would be put to good use.

And yes, they did play Pictionary®™ that night.

Also that night, they received a visit from a few furry friends, and it was a good thing, too. Dakota needed to tell them a story, and it was a bit long so she didn't want to repeat it unnecessarily, so she told it to all of them, now when they were all in one place.

That story began with a vault…


	15. Alt Epilogue: Fathers

ALTERNATE EPILOGUE - FATHERS

Meanwhile…

The waiting room was practically full, so most of the Carrotte's extended family was in the hallway that led to Miranda's room, with every one of them concerned for the little mink that had come into their lives, and the child that said mink was currently carrying. Nigel hoped the information that the odd girl he met this morning would be of some use in helping his sister-in-law's condition. The money and helicopter were already being put to good use, and the pilot was only too happy to help. The rat had caused quite a scene arriving at the hospital by helicopter, carrying what appeared to be the key to saving Miranda's baby. He was barraged by questions from everyone, but he himself didn't have the answers. It took a while to settle everyone down, sort out the data, and contact Granny to help them distribute the donations correctly. The doctors were working furiously, trying to catch up with the wealth of information, and treating Miranda accordingly, so Nigel and the family waited, but this time with a renewed sense of hope. Sometime later, Nigel's son, Nolan, arrived. Before anyone could tell him what his father had gone through, everyone suddenly heard the clatter of things being set up, and it was coming from the lounge area. The albino rat got up, motioning everybody to stay, just in case, and he padded to the lounge. Once there, it took all his will to keep his jaw from dropping. There was a sumptuous feast being laid out by several furry and human toons, with the help of the nurses, and a few other visitors as well.

"Here, now, wot's all this?" Nigel asked, suddenly reeling with the scent of the most delicious cheese he could remember.

"This is for the Carrotte-Mink-Purrestein-Norka family," said a canine, padding up to him and pulling out a note. "Is your name Carrotte?"

"Aye, but none of us ordered any of this! Oi doubt we could even _afford_ it, much less eat it all!"

"Oh, don't worry, it's all been paid for." Some of the family also padded up, curious about the whole thing.

"Wot wot?"

"Yes, all you see here was donated," the clerk added with a smile. "The benefactor called this morning, and set it all up. Spared no expense." The dog gave the rat the bill, which had "PAID IN FULL" stamped on it. "Merry Christmas."

Nolan came in at the end of the conversation, and looked around, puzzled. "Whoa, who set this up, dad?" he asked curiously.

"The benefactor wished to remain anonymous," replied the clerk.

"Wow," Nolan uttered, suddenly thinking he knew the answer.

"Indeed. Most people who spare no expense on a donation usually wish to be named and thanked," Nigel observed. "This must be one special benefactor."

The hybrid looked up at his father. "A _very_ special one, that's for sure," he smiled, knowing the answer.

The clerk just shrugged and continued setting up. "Well, son," Nigel uttered, still somewhat amazed, "let's go and fetch the others. And make sure your Auntie Miranda gets a plate too. Though from the looks of it, we'll be able to share it with everyone in the hospital and STILL have plenty left over!" The rat-cat and his father walked back to the rest to tell them of this interesting turn of events.

Dakota kept the promise she made, and did all she said she would, and much more. She even volunteered to baby sit Leo and Miranda's newborn daughter, who did _not_ die after all (nor did hundreds of hybrid children, thanks to the CPNM² (Carrote-Purrenstein-Norka-Mink-Maximilian) Hybridisation Research Foundation). In fact, she spent so much time with her she became like a little sister to her. She learned a lot about taking care of kids, enough to prepare her for those she knew she would have in the future with a certain close friend of hers. So profound was the change in her that many considered her a completely new toon. Many laughed at her new behaviour, but she didn't mind. If she could make others happy like that, then she would continue to look foolish in front of others. After all, not everyone knew what she went through. Her father, Montana, watched her from afar, sometimes with wonder, sometimes with disgust, sometimes with utter shock as she had practically changed into his polar opposite. She did her best to love him, and make him _see_ that she loved him. As to whether he accepted his "new daughter", that is another story, for another day. Dakota did her part, and that was the important matter. She wouldn't continue his greedy legacy, naturally, and he knew that, though she would always remain his loving daughter. What's more, Dakota gained even more than what she had in the past, not just in the material, but with friends and family as well. The more she gave, the more she received, and the more she laughed, too. Montana Max may have been her biological father, but now she had other fathers as well: Ebenezer Scrooge, Nicholas of Bari, Shaul of Tarshish, Zaccheus of Jericho, James Cash Penny, Milton Hershey, Adam Smith, but most importantly, she was now an adopted daughter of Abraham of Ur.

She never saw the spirits again, though she _did_ meet the _real_ Nasty Canasta once, nearly scaring the colour out of her. Though she had no more contact with the ghosts, her family, friends, and employees said that she knew how to celebrate Christmas—and Passover—and yes, even Hanukkah—better than anyone.

"May that be truly said of us, and all of us!"

And so, as Talleen said, in her role of Tiny Tim: "God bless us, every one!"

THE END / DAS ENDE / DIE EINDE / EINDE / EL FIN / O FIN / LE FIN / IL FINE / SFIRSIT / KONIEC / KONEC / BEIGAS / LOPPU / TELOS / SOF / TAMAT / LIAU LIAU / DANEH O' / WAN-LE / OWARIMASU / SLUTT / SLUT / UXUL


	16. Alt Encore: I Found a Reason

ALTERNATE ENCORE - I FOUND A REASON

Dakota, several of her cousins, and The Fourteen, were working in her room, packing her belongings, some of which were going to charity, and some to her villa. It appeared that they had accepted her story and believed her, but Anni and Mel weren't exactly calm, especially when they knew that someone else lurked in the mansion—

"Hello, bunnie-wunnies!"

"AAAHHH! ELMYRA!" screamed The Fourteen, and immediately hid—behind Dakota.

"MO-THER!" she groaned, blushing furiously. Leave it to parents to embarrass their kids in front of their friends. Her cousins, meanwhile, couldn't help but laugh. It didn't help that her mother was wearing her traditional Tiny Toons outfit, either.

Junior peeked out from behind his friend, ears low, and muttered, "Um—I mean—hello, Mrs. Maximilian."

The adult at the door giggled, "Hee hee hee—now what was that line that Babs always said? Oh, yeah. 'I just can't help myself!' Now, I just thought I'd come and see if you all would like a snack, before you head to the villa."

"Well, let me ask them." The brunette stepped to one side, revealing all the lagomorphs compacted into a nice Dakota-shape, though as soon as she stepped out of the way, they collapsed out of it. Shotsy grunted and gave her a dirty look, but Dakota just laughed, "Well, do you guys want a snack or not?"

"Well, we sure do," replied the "Artist". Timidly, the lapines stood and approached their parents' nemesis, unsure of what to make of this.

"I've got carrot cake."

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY!" Fourteen lagomorphs bounced/stampeded out of the room.

Dakota and her cousins barely managed to step out of the way. "Hey, I think they like the idea, Mom!"

To which, the adult simply replied, "Do I know bunnie-wunnies, or what?" The humans laughed and followed the rabbits down to the living room, where several large carrot cakes and flagons of carrot juice awaited them—as well as some lettuce, too.

The Fourteen, no longer afraid, hopped over to eat.

From somewhere, a piano began to play, accompanied by drums, then a guitar, and then a bass completed the ensemble.

The humanmaid sat among her new friends, eating cake.

"_I'm not a perfect person._

_There are many things I wish I didn't do."_

And she stuffed some down Tex's mouth, starting a food fight.

_"But I continue learning._

_I never meant to do those things to you."_

In the middle of the melee, she pulled him to the floor, and kissed him.

_"And so I have to say before I go:_

_That I just want you to know!"_

They picked up the boxes and suitcases, and walked out of the room to a waiting WE-haul truck, and a limousine.

_"I've found a reason for me!_

_To change who I used to be!"_

Through the window of her limousine, she sadly looked back at the mansion, even though she knew she would come back later today.

_"A reason to start over new!_

_And the reason is you…"_

But smiled again as she sat next to Tex.

_"I'm sorry that I hurt you._

_It's something I must live with everyday."_

She saw Tex handing several boxes to a homeless shelter, and she laughed again.

_"And all the pain I put you through—!_

_I wish that I could take it all away."_

All was forgiven, yes, but the pain would always be there.

_"And be the one who catches all your tears._

_That's why I need you to hear—!"_

As they drove on, she held his paw.

_"I've found a reason for me!_

_To change who I used to be!"_

The villa was a huge structure of Spanish colonial style, marked with earth tones, and dark highlights. Willows and azaleas were scattered about the estate.

_"A reason to start over new!_

_And the reason is **YOUUUU**!"_

The ostentatiousness of it made her feel shame again. Tex noticed, and he placed an arm on her shoulder.

"_And the reason is **YOUUUU**!"_

He kissed her cheek, leaning his ears toward her.

"_And the reason is **YOUUUU**!"_

She hugged him.

"_And the reason is **YOUUUU**!"_

Both walked inside.

Now came the unloading, but there wasn't much of that. Shotsy gave a few hints for redecorating, but there wasn't much that Dakota wanted to add. Her office was transferred there as well, practically the only place that actually seemed "lavish". Eventually, it got dark. Her cousins went home, and The Fourteen, one by one, burrowed away.

_"I'm not a perfect person._

_I never meant to do those things to you."_

Tex, however, remained at the main door.

"_And so I have to say before I go:_

_That I just want you to know!"_

He held her hands.

"_I've found a reason for me!"_

Placing an arm around her shoulder, both turned to face the California sunset.

"_To change who I used to be!"_

Her head found his shoulder, and he ground his teeth softly.

"_A reason to start over new!"._

She cried, both for joy, and regret for all the time lost.

"_And the reason is you…"_

He held her closer, rubbing his chin on her head.

"_I've found a reason to show—!"_

He looked at her eyes.

"_A side of me you didn't know!"_

They pulled closer.

"_A reason for all that I do!"_

Their lips met once again.

"_And the reason is you…"_

They remained like that as the sun sank on the ground, making room for the stars, planets, and galaxies, letting them glimpse at the new couple, the female formerly being Jacob Marley's Daughter.

Both stood, and then she smiled at her new boyfriend.

* * *

Cree Summer Franks and John Kassir (originally by Michael W. Smith) 

"Cry for Love"

I'LL LEAD YOU HOME

©1995 Reunion Records

She told him the story of how she flew on Santa's sleigh, _"My life is like a racing car—hurtling towards the wall—_

_At the speed of sound."_

Tex laughed and replied, twirling her like a top, _"My time has been so finely tuned but I've never seen a human being—_

_So tightly wound."_

She laughed too, sagging her arms, _"At times it seems beyond belief, I just need a bit of relief_

_Like a war-weary soldier."_

She took his paw and ran up a hill_, "Marching up and over the edge, take my hand and pull me up cause I'm falling too faaaast!"_ And she nearly falling down.

She looked at the night_, "Somehow I've lost my way—I'm cryin' 'Save me!'"_

Both clamoured to eternity, _"Can You hear meeee? I'm calling ouuuut!_

_I'm crying ouuuut—!—A cry for loooove…"_

Then they held hands/paws again, _"I can feel Youuuu—!—You're touching meeee!"_

They looked at each other, _"You healing meeee—!—My cry for loooove!"_ Then, she walked away.

She shook her head, _"I will be the first to admit: I don't have the strength to handle it—_

_Alone anymore."_ He followed, worried.

Then she looked up and smiled, _"I don't have to fret, don't have to explain, all my worryin' is in vain,_

_I'm not alone anymore!"_

Tex asked_, "Why is this so hard to believe? What is mine is mine to freely receive—_

_Like the changing of seasons."_ which passed before them.

He held up his Book, _"This is the beauty of the Word, and for all that I have seen and heard—_

_Oh, I want to come hoooome!"_

He hollered to the sky, _"Somehow I'll make my way—my way home to YouuuuUU!"_

Suddenly, Dakota was alone. She yelled, _"Can You hear meeee? I'm calling ouuuut!_

_I'm crying ouuuut—!—A cry for loooove…"_

Suddenly she felt Tex behind her, _"I can feel Youuuu—!—You're touching meeee!"_

She looked at his eyes, _"You healing meeee—!—My cry for loooove!"_

Once again, he called to the night, but softly, _"Oh, Father, hear my call—"_

She echoed, _"Oh, Father, hear my call."_

She threw herself back at him_, "I know You'll catch me when I fall…"_ And he caught her, too, smiling.

Then she stood again and cried, _"Oh, Father, hear my call! I know You'll catch me when I fall!_

_Oh, I pray that You'll hold me now—hold me!"_ He held her arm.

Tex, _"And take my fear awaaaay…"_ And as they asked, their fear of the future was gone. They both knew Who had brought them together, and what their purpose was. They had been healed, for their cry for love had been answered.

She looked at her new gold Cross and Star, _"I'm cryin', 'Save me!'" _Then, all the bucks of The Fourteen appeared behind them, chorusing on bass.

Looking at the sky, she hollered, _"Oh, I know that You can hear me!"_

_"Dooo—hee-oh—doombah—"_

She brought her fists close, _"Heeeear me crying out for love!"_

_"Dooo—hee-oh—doombah—"_

And smiled, _"Oh, I know that You can feel—my cry for looooooo—ooh!"_

_"Dooo—hee-oh—doombah—dooo—hee-oh—doombah—"_

A Light from both shone above them, and a Voice called out, ****

**_"I can feel youuuu—you're calling ouuuut._**

**_You're crying ouuuut: a cry for loooove."_**

Both knew their requests have been answered. They smiled at the Light, reaching up to touch It.

Tex, _"I can feel Youuuu—"_

Dakota, _"I can feel You!"_

Tex, _"You're touching meeee—"_

Dakota, _"Oh, You're touching me!"_

Tex, _"You're healing meeee—"_

Dakota, _"You're healing **MEEEE**!"_

Tex, _"My cry for loooove."_

Dakota, _"Oh, my cry for love!"_

The Reply came again,

**_"I can feel youuuu—"_**

Dakota, _"I know that You can hear me!"_

**_"You're calling ouuuut—"_**

Dakota, _"Heeeear me crying out for love."_

**_"You're crying ouuuut—"_**

Dakota_, "I know that you can feel— "_

**_"A cry for loooove."_**

Dakota, _"My cry for looooooo—ooooh!"_

Overwhelmed with joy, they continued singing to the Light throughout the night,

Tex, _"I can feel Youuuu—"_

Dakota, _"I can feel You!"_

Tex, _"You're touching meeee—"_

Dakota, _"Oh, You're touching me!"_

Tex, _"You're healing meeee—"_

Dakota_, "You're healing **MEE**!"_

Tex, _"My cry for loooove…"_

Dakota, _"—my—cryyyy…!"_

And the Light would be with them…

…forever.

Cree Summer Franks and John Kassir (originally by Michael W. Smith)

"Cry for Love"

I'LL LEAD YOU HOME

©1995 Reunion Records


	17. Credits and Bloopers and Deleted Scenes

CREDITS AND BLOOPERS AND DELETED SCENES

The Tiny Toons characters, Chicken Boo, The Warner Brothers (and the Warner Sister) were created by Tom Ruegger, Glen Kennedy, Dave Marshall, Ken Boyer, and Rich Arons, I think.

However, Duncan Duff, Amanda Duff, MacArthur 'Mac' Duff, Emily Duff, and Queegee Bananaho were created by Deanna Oliver, I think.

Nasty Canasta was created by Charles Mendelson "Chuck" Jones, I think.

Granny "Emma" and Yosemite Sam were created by Friz Freleng, I think.

The names of Santa Claus' reindeer were conceived by Clement Clarke Moore.

Rudoph, however, was created by Robert L. May.

Bugs Bunny was created by Tex Avery.

Honey Bunny was created by Robert McKimson

Lola Bunny was created by Leonardo Benvenuti, Timothy Harris, Steve Rudnick, and Herschel Weingrod, I think.

* * *

"No, Tex, it's NOT over. Not until J or J.A.M. are gone. I WILL win. I'm RICH. I HAVE to win. No (CENSORED) felines are going to get the best of me, EVER! I WILL DESTROY THE J, IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO!" 

With that, she threw him out of her way, and—

(KATHUD!)

—tripped over his footpaws, sending both to the floor.

"CUT!"

"Sorry there, Tex."

* * *

Suddenly a scowl replaced her smile. "J was a (CENSORED)! We could have made beautiful music—and profits—togeth—" Nothing. "Togeth—? Together?" 

"CUT!"

Dakota called out, "UNCLE! YOU MISSED YOUR CUE!"

The door creaked open, "Someone needs to cue me a bit louder, don't you think?"

* * *

She jumped back with a start. The raspberry had come from the wall! But there was no one there, either! Just the portraits— 

"PHHHLLLBBBTT!"

"PA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"

"CUT!"

"I'M—HA HA HA HA HA—SORRY, BUT I WOULDN'T LAUGH IF HE DIDN'T LOOK SO FUNNY!"

"Can we get another Scrooge here?" quipped the portrait.

* * *

(By Rottin Kid) 

The ghost loosened the bandage on his head, and much to Dakota's fright, that caused his jaw to swing down to his chest, allowing a horrifying shriek to explode from the apparition—

(WHAM!)

—Causing Dee to go flying into the wall of the set.

"CUT!"

"(groans) Could we turn down the wind machine, a wee tad?"

* * *

(SHOOF—WHEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…) 

Dakota dashed to the rampart, quite shocked at seeing the ghost fall off the balcony like Professor Wile did in his old shorts. As soon as she looked down, though, Hughes' ghost suddenly shot back up to her face—

(BONK!)

"CUT!"

Dakota staggered back, holding her nose, while Howard held his head, both in agony. "You leaned too far there, Dee!"

"(CENSORED)!" was all she could say.

* * *

All characters are © Warner Brothers/Amblin Entertainment (and used without permission, but it's doubtful that they mind) EXCEPT FOR: 

Nolan Carrotte, Talleen Carrotte, Lionel Carrotte, Nigel Carrotte, Lizbeth Fox, Adam Junior "A.J." Fox, Sir Rupert Carrotte, Lillian Carrotte, Viktor Norka, Amanda Norka, Soho Prep, and Jessimyn Wolf, who are © Jennifer Cleckley. Used with permission.

Adam Fox is © Eric Richardson. Used with permission.

Roberta Rat and RuBarb Carrotte, who are © Jerry D. Withers and Lee M. Withers. Used with permission.

Miranda Carrotte, who is © Jerry D. Withers and Zachary Zulkowski. Used with permission.

Erik Wolf, Jason Wolf, Jasmine Wolf, and Lillian Wolf, who are © Erik Ahlstedt. Used with permission.

The M, who is © The J.A.M./Jennifer Cleckley.

THE FOURTEEN: Team Aleph (first litter): Buster Junior Bunny, Alexandra "Alexi" Bunny, Miriam Bunny, Tex Bunny, Isidore "Crazy Friz" Bunny, and Shotsy Bunny. Team Beth (second litter): Mortimer "Morty" Bunny, Rebecca "Bekki" Bunny, June Bunny, and Hunni Bunny. Team Gimmel (third litter): Barbara Ann "Anni" Bunny, Melvin "Mel" Bunny, Buck Bunny, and Charles "Chuck" Bunny; who are © The J.A.M.

Dakota Dee, the _wives, husbands, fiancée, sons, and daughters_ of the Duff family, Beauregard, The J.A.M., The R.I.C.K., The T-M.A.N., The R.R.O.S.I.E., and The E.M.M.Y., who are also © The J.A.M.

I suppose that the representations of Christmas Past and Christmas Present are public domain.

* * *

(Also by Rottin Kid) 

Without a word, the Ghost grabbed Dakota by the back of her shirt and hoisted her off the bed.

(ri-i-i-i-ip!) Suddenly the pyjama top gave way.

(fwoomp!) And Dakota landed back on the bed, where she quickly wrapped the comforter around her torso. "What IS this? Torture Dee week?"

"…cut…"

* * *

"But what about all the dealings that I still have pending?" she protested. 

"Oh, don't worry. Your dad sent a chicken with me to deal with those. Trust me, he's the—no, wait—"

"CUT!"

"Buckawk!"

It took Dakota and the students a while to stop laughing.

* * *

"**_J_**! I _will_ find out your name, J! One way or another, I WILL know! AND ON THAT DAY, I WILL CURSE YOUR REAL NAME AND YOUR RELIGION!" By the time Dakota finished screaming, the young onça was out of sight. **_"I WILL TAKE YOUR HIDE AND USE IT FOR PYJAMAS!"_**

"…and…cut—"

"YOU WILL BOW DOWN BEFORE ME, JOR-EL! EVEN IF IT TAKES _AN ETERNITY_! _YOU_ _WILL_ _BOW_ _DOWN_ BEFORE ME! AND SOMEDAY—YOUR (CENSORED)!—I mean—'heirs'—ha ha ha ha!"

"That's enough, Dee, just get ready for the next shot."

* * *

"I—um—if you want to—well—I'd like—to continue the workouts—and—and all the competition. I know—I know now that you're—you're—(grunting)—better than me—but—but—that doesn't mean—well—that we can't—we can't—um—train—with each other." 

"Sounds fine to me. I never knew you could take so much, and I'll tell you, I—I—never knew you could—take so much—and make me forget the rest!—I—"

"CUT!"

* * *

Props by Acme Co. 

Bicycle furnished by Montero.

Soho Prep was established by Jennifer Cleckley.

Soho Junior Academy was established by The J.A.M.

Loony Elementary was also established by The J.A.M.

The CPNM² Hybridisation Research Foundation and The Norka-Carrotte Hybridisation Research Foundation were also established by The J.A.M.

Club Swank was established by Jennifer Cleckley and Jerry T. Withers.

Mary Melody's wardrobe furnished by Oscar de la Renta.

The J.A.M.'s wardrobe furnished by Yazbek and Casio.

Dakota Dee's wardrobe furnished by Pierre Cardin.

Elmyra's wardrobe furnished by Miss Take.

Soho Junior Academy's uniform designed by Jennifer Cleckley

Santa Claus' wardrobe (and his appearance in general) was designed by Thomas Nast. Additional designs by The J.A.M.

DIP was created by Gary K. Wolf.

The term "aniplasm" was coined by Abel DuSable.

International Nekkid Day was established by Pepe K.

Looney Toon consultant: Professor Nathaniel T. Freeman

* * *

"A waste?" asked the ghost. He reached into his bag, and pulled out—not a present—but a handful of gold dust. 

"GOLD!" screamed the teenager, lunging for the bag.

(WHUMP)

And grabbing it, making everybody laugh.

"CUT!"

"A bit slow there, grandpa," she giggled.

"Sorry."

* * *

"Well we certainly can't call it the (CENSORED) Band. Unless we only wished to play rough clubs," chuckled her boyfriend, and host, tuning his— 

(POINK!)

Nolan exhibited the guitar to the camera while everyone laughed.

"THESE ARE THE WORST STRINGS IN THE WORLD!"

"Oh, just cut already…"

* * *

The older rabbit looked blankly at all of them, then he resumed his teeth grinding. "Well—with what Dee did today—she—she made Scrooge look like Sister Teresa." 

The band stood still at that (but eyeing each other), while Dakota just crossed her arms. "What, she only made it to 'sister', Tex?"

"CUT!"

"Say what?"

"MOTHER Teresa!" screamed everyone, laughing.

* * *

"Because," he replied, shutting the closet and locking it, "she _knows_ her presents are here. All she has to do to receive them is (CREEEEAK) come here and—" he turned and tried again. "—and help me lock this stupid door!" 

"CUT!"

* * *

Before she could put her jaw back in place and reply, a swift kick suddenly burst open the door— 

(THUD!)

—and the door fell to the floor.

"CUT!"

Anni looked sheepishly at the fallen door while Tex laughed, "Tee-hee—I'd better go easy on the leg bench presses, don't you think?"

* * *

Both cousins looked at him, and then A.J. looked at him in the eye. "Prayer, my friend. Lots and LOTS of prayer," and he too scrambled up the ladder— 

(SLIP!)

A.J. barely managed to grab a rung, but he definitely slipped.

"CUT! You okay, Adam?"

"Just barely!"

* * *

"'_If these shadows remain unchanged',"_ he proclaimed solemnly, "I see a new nursery, new baby furniture, new baby clothes, and new baby toys, all new—" Dakota sighed in relief, "—and unused, carefully preserved, yet gathering dust. If these shadows remain unaltered in the Future, the baby will die." Dakota gasped slightly. "But," added the ghost, business-like, "Perhaps you're right. 'Why don't they let evolution take its course and eliminate that freak before it's born, geez'!" She whirled at him, as if she had just been slapped in the face. Then, with a sternness never seen on someone so jovial, he leaned down to her face and scolded, "Child! _'If a child you be in heart, not adamant, forbear that wicked cant until you have discovered who the Freaks are, **what** they are, and **where** they are. Will YOU decide what toons shall live, and what toons shall die? It may be that in the sight of Heaven, you are more **worthless** and less fit to live—_" 

"Cut…"

"What was wrong with that?"

"Nothing, Santa—it's just that the couple behind you can't stop smooching for a moment."

"We just can't help ourselves!" giggled Miranda.

* * *

Original casting by Steven Spielberg. 

Additional casting by Rottin Kid/The Incredible Werekitty and The J.A.M.

Voice direction by Andrea Romano.

Mary Melody is Cree Summer Franks  
Dakota Dee is also Cree Summer Franks  
Duncan Duff is Whitby Hertford  
Granny is June Foray

The Fourteen are:  
Team Aleph:  
Junior is Charles Adler  
Alexi is Tress MacNeille  
Miriam is Candi Milo  
Tex is John Kassir  
Friz is Frank Welker  
Shotsy is Sherry Lynn

Team Beth:  
Morty is Nathan Ruegger  
Bekki is Nancy Cartwright  
June is Russi Taylor  
Hunni is Kath Soucie

Team Gimmel:  
Anni is Francesca Marie Smith  
Mel is Luke Ruegger  
Buck is Richard Beals  
Chuck is also Richard Beals

The J is The N.I.M.H.  
The M is Keisha Knight-Pulliam  
A.J. Fox is Frankie Munez  
Roberta Rat is Alyson Court  
Nolan Carrotte is Daniel Radcliffe  
Talleen Carrotte is E.G. Daily  
Howard Hughes is Terry O'Quinn  
The ghost of Christmas Past is Dick Van Dyke  
Yosemite Sam is Noel Blanc  
The ghost of Christmas Present is Chuck McCann  
The Clerk is Casey Kasem  
Elmyra is also Cree Summer Franks  
Mac Duff is Matt Frewer  
Emily Duff is also Tress MacNeille  
Amanda Duff is Soleil-Moon Frye  
"Baby" Duff is James Earl Jones  
Cousin One "The Artist" is Yeardly Smith  
Cousin Two is Toran Caudell  
Cousin Three is Tara Strong  
Cousin Four is B.J. Ward  
Cousin Five is Luke Ruegger  
Cousin Six is also Pauline Renniee  
Babs Bunny is also Tress MacNeille  
Buster Bunny is also Charles Adler  
Miranda Carrotte is Laraine Newman  
Lionel "Leo" Carrotte is Rob Paulsen  
The J.A.M. (cub) is The N.I.M.H.  
The R.I.C.K. is also The N.I.M.H.  
The R.R.O.S.I.E. is Herself  
The T-M.A.N. is Himself  
Nasty Canasta is Himself  
Janitor One is Mike Myers  
Janitor Two is Hank Azaria  
The Auctioneer is John Moschitta  
Wakko Warner is Jess Harnell  
The Pen-pal is Phyllis Diller  
Gogo Dodo is Frank Welker  
The Minister is also James Earl Jones  
Montana Max is Danny Cooksey  
Dizzy Devil is Maurice Lamarche  
Mel's Son is Bill Murray  
Nigel Carrotte is Jeff Glenn Bennett  
Amanda Carrotte is Emma Watson

and

The J.A.M. as himself

Special appearances by:

Bill Cosby as The Doctor

* * *

(Yet another by Rottin Kid) 

She whirled toward the source of the sound—and immediately fell to hands and knees. "Okay...somebody stop the floor, I wanna get off!"

"Cut!"

* * *

"You do realise," she explained, turning to him, "that I'm underage, and I can't go into bars for several years yet."

He insisted with his gun.

"Listen, dummy! I can't go in there! I may be evil, but I'm NOT an alcoholic!"

Suddenly Canasta dropped his arm and chuckled.

"CUT!"

"This would be easier if you didn't make funny faces, Dakota!"

"ME?"

* * *

(Still another by Rottin Kid) 

The Caucasian pushed open the swinging doors, making them creak on rusted hinges—or at least TRIED to push open the swinging doors. She heaved and grunted for several moments before hanging off one of the doors, and panted a bit. "A little help here?" Dee asked with a grin.

"CUT!"

* * *

The brunette had enough. She pulled away from the window and demanded, "ALL RIGHT, CANASTA! JUST _WHOSE_ STUFF ARE THEY AUCTIONING OFF!"

The ghost just stood there.

She raised angry fists. "(CENSORED) it, you—hee hee—just have—HA HA HA HA HA HA!"

"CUT!"

"WHOSE MAKING THE FUNNY FACES NOW, CANASTA! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"

* * *

For a moment, the ghost twirled his gun, as if thinking something, and then backed out of the room. The girl followed him— 

(click-click-click-click)

Dakota rolled on the floor with laughter while Canasta chuckled, "Heh heh, forgot to reload between scenes—"

"Cut…"

* * *

Music directed by Steve Bernstein and John Van Tongren. 

"O Fortuna" ("Fortuna Imperatrix Mundi") from the album "Carmina Burana" is © Deutsche Grammaphon. Arranged by Carl Orff. Performed by the London Philharmonic Orchestra. Directed by Herbert Von Karajan. Used without permission.

"Red Letters" is © 1998 Achtober Songs / Out of Twisted Roots Music / Blind Theif Publishing / Fun Attic Music, from the album "Supernatural", © 1998 Forefront Records / Virgin Records America, Inc. Words and Music by Toby McKeehan, Michael Tait, Kevin Max and Mark Heimermann. Performed by Charles Adler, Tress MacNeille, Candi Milo, John Kassir, Frank Welker, Sherry Lynn, Nathan Ruegger, Nancy Cartwright, Russi Taylor, Kath Soucie, Francesca Marie Smith, Luke Ruegger, Richard Beals, Keisha Knight-Pulliam, The N.I.M.H., Alyson Court, Daniel Radcliffe, and E.G. Daily. Used without permission.

"Hallelujah" is © 2001 Dreamworks Records. Written by Leonard Cohen. Performed by John Kassir. Used without permission.

"War" is © 1985 Scotti Bros. Records. Written by Vince di Cola. Performed by the London Philharmonic Orchestra. Used without permission.

"It's My Party" is © 1986 Broken Records. Written by Dave Stewart and Barbara Gaskin. Performed by Frankie Munez. Adapted lyrics by The J.A.M. Used without permission.

"The Lost Christmas Eve" is © 2004 Lava Records, from the album "The Lost Christmas Eve". Written by Paul O'Neill. Performed by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Used without permission.

"Last Daze" is © 1990 Dayspring (Word) Records, from the album "Beyond Belief". Words and music by Bob Hartman. Adapted lyrics by The J.A.M. Performed by The N.I.M.H., Francesca Marie Smith, Frankie Munez, and Daniel Radcliffe. Used without permission.

"I'm with you" is © 2002 Arista Records, from the album "Let Go". Written by Avril Lavigne. Adapted lyrics by Jennifer Cleckley. Performed by Cree Summer Franks. Used without permission.

"The Reason" is © 2003 Universal Records, from the album "The Reason". Written by Douglas Robb. Performed by Hoobastank. Used without permission.

"Cry For Love" is © 1995 Reunion Records, from the album "I'll Lead You Home". Written by Michael W. Smith and Brent Bourgeois. Performed by Cree Summer Franks and John Kassir. Used without permission.

* * *

"Hello, Dakota," he replied. His voice had deepened over the years. He looked at the lab coat that covered his daughter, in contrast to his charcoal business suit. "This is a big project you're working on, isn't it?" 

"…………that's a good question, Dad."

"CUT!"

"Sorry, I got spaced out there. What was my next line?"

* * *

"Uh—if we were all invited at different times, how is it that we all arrived at the same time?" asked Buck, slowly. Everyone looked around, and stood still. 

For quite a while.

"CUT! Who didn't cue the doors?"

* * *

"THEY WON'T!" screamed Buster. "You can have them! You can raise them and make them your employees, servants, sidekicks, ANYTHING! But—but—it seems that #19 needs a change!" 

"CUT!"

* * *

(Hey, another one by Rottin Kid!) 

Then, like the proper toon she was, she began bouncing all over the room a-la Daffy Duck, with the required, "WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO! WOO-HOO!" that normally accompanied such celebration—

(WHAM!)

And promptly slammed into a wall. "Dang, what's the deal with these walls?"

"CUT!"

* * *

(What do you know, here's another one by Rottin Kid!) 

Her bare feet, in contrast to the rat's Wellingtons, stiffened under the chill of the snow, sending shivers all over her —"(CENSORED), that's COLD!"

"CUT!"

* * *

(Oh dear, one more by Rottin Kid!) 

Suddenly the brunette grabbed his paw and proceeded to dance around the sidewalk, with the bewildered albino rat in tow—until they tripped each other and landed in the snow, with both Dee and Nigel laughing themselves silly. "Man, when did I become such a CLUTZ?"

"No clue, old girl, but it was rather funny."

"(sigh)…cut…"

* * *

The "Search your feelings" line was, of course, originally written by George Lucas and is © 1980 Lucasfilm. Used without permission. 

No copyright infringement is intended or implied. I did all this for the fun of it.

All of the characters, places, and events portrayed in this fanfic are fictitious. Any resemblance to any real persons, places, or events is unintentional and purely coincidental, except in cases of severe self-insertion, I suppose, but even then the similarities are controlled, hee hee.

SPECIAL THANKS

To WE-haul.

To Milton-Bradley, for Pictionary®™.

To Professor Nathaniel T. Freeman, Rottin Kid/The Incredible Werekitty, Jerry Withers, and Radar Foxbat, for providing vital character information.

To Abel DuSable for a few obscure references here.

EXTRA SPECIAL THANKS

To Charles Dickens.

To Rottin Kid/The Incredible Werekitty, for all your help and suggestions, especially on Stave Four.

To Chris Silva, for helping me get my data back. You're the best.

* * *

"The heliport is on the roof—just take the elevator down the hall—HA HA HA!—wait, did you say you didn't prepare dinner? Don't worry—HA HA HA HA HA!—I'll take care of that, too! NOW GO! YOUR NIECE NEEDS YOU! AND YOU CAN KEEP THE SUITCASES!" She practically shoved him out the door— 

(THUD!)

And he fell at the entrance.

"…(sigh)…cut…"

"Oi fell on moi tail, wot…" he groaned under the suitcases.

* * *

She was leaning into his face, making him lean back. Slowly, he reached behind him, preparing to brandish a mallet. "D-Dee, what are you talking about? I can't help you anymore!" 

"'HELP'?" she blurted, as if she had been asked for a weasel. And for no reason, both began dancing:

"Help! I need somebody—

Help! Not just anybody—

Help!"

"…cut…"

* * *

(Ack! One more by Rottin Kid!) 

_Oh, I could DEFINATELY get used to this,_ thought the female, now getting quite thoroughly lost in the kiss as it deepened. Tex leaned Dee back, and they were both suddenly interrupted by both Tex's and Dee's feet slipping in the snow (fwoomp!) and they both fell in.

"CUT!"

The humanmaid just laughed.

* * *

"PUBLICITY STUNTS!" Dee uttered in pure disbelief. "Bekki Bunny, if this was a publicity stunt, would I be here, instead of at a press conference, forgetting my lines and wondering why the cue card guy just went on a coffee break!" 

"CUT!"

* * *

She didn't get to finish her request, because suddenly her uncle picked her up and carried her on his shoulders—

(BONK!)

—bonking her head on the top door frame, making everyone laugh.

"CUT!"

"Uncle, you forgot to duck…!" she groaned, nearly falling off him.

* * *

(Don't panic, but there's one more by Rottin Kid!) 

"AAAHHH! ELMYRA!" screamed The Fourteen, and immediately hid—behind Dakota.

"MO—"

(KATHUMP!)

The fourteen rabbits were now on the floor, on top of Dakota.

"CUT!"

"All right! WHO didn't study their Toony Evasion and Hiding 101!" demanded Alexi.

"Hee hee, we dog piled Dakota!" giggled Buck.

A muffled Dakota groaned from the bottom "Who's wearing the 'Baby Loony Tunes' underoos? This was NOT a view I wanted!"

"PFFT! I had somebody's FOOT in my mouth!" hissed Shotsy. Elmyra, meanwhile, was holding onto the doorframe laughing herself silly.

From somewhere in the pile, Bekki cursed, "And it went so (CENSORED) well in rehearsal!"

* * *

(This is insane! Still another by Rottin Kid!) 

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY!" Fourteen lagomorphs bounced/stampeded out of the room.

Dakota and her cousins—were nowhere to be seen?

"CUT! What happened here?

From the floor, a flattened Dakota groaned, "Medic..."

* * *

Just in case you're wondering, the various ways of saying "The End" are written in English, German, Afrikaans, Dutch, Spanish, Portuguese, French, Italian, Romanian, Polish, Russian, Latvian, Finnish, Greek, Hebrew, Malay, Hokkien, Seneca, Chinese, Japanese, Norwegian, Swedish, and Mayan, respectively. 

END TAG:

Talleen comes out of the TTA rings and proclaims, "God bless us, everyone!"

Until next time, remember:

I AM THE J.A.M.

Good evening.

(WARP!)

* * *

DELETED SCENES 

_It could be said that from the ending of Stave Five to the conclusion of the first encore is a deleted segment in itself, as that was my original idea for ending this story. Rottin Kid had other ideas, of course, and after VERY long nights of discussion, I gave in and thusly prepared the second ending. There was one other idea that I had scrapped: I had originally intended for the Ghost of Christmas Future to be another character instead of Nasty Canasta. Basically, this is what the end of Stave Four and the beginning of Stave Five would have looked like if I had gone along with that first idea._

Suddenly, the silence was broken.

Despite the sound being infinitely hushed, lower than a whisper, the surrounding silence made it sound like a sonic boom that pounded in Dakota's brain and chest. It took her several seconds to identify the sound as a very soft crunch of gravel, almost _too_ soft, but as it increased in volume she also heard some very deep breathing, almost a growling. She whirled toward the source of the sound—

—and fading in from the mist, walking toward her with only the sound of his footfalls, was The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come.

STAVE FIVE - THE LAST OF THE SPIRITS

Dakota Dee had never been so scared in her life. The sight and sound of the ghost tore at her innermost recesses, ripping away all the presumption and pride and greed and hate that she had built for herself. As the ghost came closer, she began to distinguish him from the surrounding darkness. It was a monster black panther, 2 metres at the shoulder, with muscles rippling as it padded closer and closer to her. It wore no textile whatsoever. As it moved closer still, she saw that the face wasn't covered by anything, either, in fact, she could _see_ the face—

"I don't believe this," she commented with an involuntary crack in her voice. For a moment, she thought that J's, or even his father's face, was the same face of the panther in front of her, but a permanent scowl and baring of fangs indicated otherwise. Also, there was a faint red glow coming from the eyes. The breathing was _definitely_ mixed with growling, characteristic of non-toony feral panthers. "Now isn't this ironic?" she scoffed. "How fitting that the personification of the future just HAPPENS to be a blatant reminder of my nemeses, while remaining completely unknown, and also having the ability to scare the (CENSORED) out of me!"

The panther stood in front of her, his unblinking gaze tearing down the insolence of the humanmaid below. His glare tore at her so much that she had to turn away. Trying to drown out her own terror, she commented, "I suppose that you're not going to say anything?"

Breathing/growling.

"That's what I thought. You'd think that Whoever did this would just THINK of having you use an _incredible_ invention that has revolutionised communication everywhere: it's called SPEECH. If you try that, you could get your message through to me much more efficiently."

The ghost showed no amusement or surprise at her suggestion. She continued, "You're _really_ freaking me out, more than the other two, you know."

Silence.

She didn't know what would be more horrifying: a demonic voice, a mechanical breathing a-la Darth Vader, or the infernal breathing/growling that was consuming her, broken only by her own cries. Seeing that she wouldn't get any dialogue from him, she sighed with defeat. "Okay, okay, so you're the Ghost of Christmas Future. You're here to show me what _could_ happen later on. But how are you going to show me anything here? We're in the middle of nowhere!"

Finally, the ghost gestured. He turned his head toward a building on Dakota's left. It only took her a moment to deduce that he was telling her where to go. She turned—

—and saw that he was pointing to a saloon.

"You do realise," she explained, turning to him, "that I'm underage, and I can't go into bars for several years yet."

He insisted with his head.

"Listen, dummy! I can't go in there! I may be evil, but I'm NOT an alcoholic!"

Without saying a word, the ghost leaned over and picked up Dakota by her pyjama neck, and padded over to the saloon. "HEY! WHAT—! You know, that is getting reeeeealy old." The ghost's head pushed open the swinging doors, making them creak on rusted hinges, and unceremoniously dropped the Caucasian on the dusty wooden floor.

The saloon looked like any abandoned and decrepit western saloon, except that there were no tables, chairs, or barstools. There was a bar on the opposite side, but there was nothing behind it. A seemingly endless wall with countless windows completed the front side. Dust, dirt, and sand were everywhere.

"This place looks a lot bigger from the inside than from the outside." She stood and turned, "Okay, we're here, and I doubt you're going to buy me a drink. So now what?"

The ghost then did something odd. He padded to the first window next to the door, raised a paw, and slid it open. Dakota didn't think that to be anything special—

—then she did a double take when she noticed light coming from outside, but only through _that_ window. Cautiously, she approached it, and looked outside—

—and looked back inside with a raised eyebrow. She looked outside again to make sure that she was seeing what she was seeing. "Now this is decidedly strange," she said to herself, as she examined the scene "outside".

"Outside" was actually "inside"…

_That was basically it. I hope you enjoyed this story!_


End file.
